PEOPLE, I LOVING IF TO THE MOVIES.
AND FOR THOSE OF YOU WHO HAVEN'T BEEN TO THE MOVIES IN A WHILE,
BUT YOU CAN'T SKIP ANY OF THE ADS.
THE ONLY PROBLEM IS I NEVER KNOW WHICH MOVIES TO GO TO.
I MEAN, WILL I UNDERSTAND "ANGRY BIRDSY" IF I DON'T PLAY THE
GAME.
ONCE AGAIN IT'S TIME FOR "NOT AT THE MOVIES, WITH GIL PEACHES."
IS LIKE THE INTERNET, BUT YOU ( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )
HELLO HELLO, I'M GIL PEACHES.
I'M GIL PEACHES.
WELCOME TO "NOT AT THE MOVIES, WITH ME, GIL PEACHES."
HELLO, I'M GIL PEACHES.
HERE ARE THE MOVIES I SAW THIS WEEK.
"X-MEN: APOCALYPSE."
NOW, FOR THOSE OF YOU NOT FAMILIAR WITH ROMAN NUMERAL
NOW, FOR THOSE OF YOU NOT ES, THAT MEANS "10 MEN
APOCALYPSE."
AND MY FAVORITE OF THE 10 MEN WAS MAGNETO.
HIS SUPER POWER WAS RIGHT THERE IN HIS NAME, MAGNET.
PROFESSOR X.SPD SHOULD HAVE BEEN PROFESSOR READS YOUR MIND, AND
SICLOPS SHOULD HAVE BEEN JOHNNIE LASER EYES.
I CAN NOT CARE FOR THIS MOVIE UPON FOR ONE THING, I HAD
TROUBLE FOCUSING ON THE PLOT BECAUSE THE FLOOR WAS VERY
STICKY AND IT MADE ME WISH I'D WORN SHOES.
I GIVE "X-MEN: APOCALYPSE" FOUR BASKETBALLS AND ONE VOLLEYBALL
FOR CARTOON VIOLENCE.
NEXT UP, "FINDING DORY."
HELLO, I'M GIL PEACHES.
NBILITY LOU, OOULT NORMALLY, I'M EXCITED TO SEE A
SEE A PIXAR SEQUEL BECAUSE OF ALL THE CARS, ESPECIALLY WHEN
THEY'RE PLANES.
BUT I JUST DON'T RELATE TO FISH.
THEY SWIM IN THE SAME WATER AS THEIR POOP I HAVEN'T DONE THAT
SINCE I WAS KICKED OUT OF THE "Y."
PUT UP A SIGN, GUYS.
THEY ALSO LEFT OUT MY FAVORITE PIXAR CHARACTER, SHREK.
SO I HAD TO DRAW A PICTURE OF HIM ON MY POPCORN RECEIPT AND
HOLD IT IN FRONT OF THE SCREEN.
RIP OFF.
I GIVE "FINDING DORY" THREE THUMBS UP.
TWO WHITE, ONE AFRICAMERITHUMB.
NEITHER UP OR DOWN.
THEY DON'T WANT TO GET INVOLVED.
HELLO, I'M GIL PEACHES.
THE LAST MOVIE I SAW THIS WEEK WAS "MIKE AND DAVE NEED WEDDING
DATES."
NORMALLY I SEE MOVIES ALONE, BUT THIS TIME I BROUGHT MY COUSIN,
JILL PEACHESES, BECAUSE SHE'S VERY SMART, AND IT WAS MY
GRANDMOTHER'S DYING WISH.
>>NANA'S NOT DEAD YET BUT WE'RE GETTING THE WISHES OUT OF THE
WAY.
>> Stephen: HELLO, I'M GIL PEACHES. GIL
PEACHES.
>> HOW'S BRENDA,.
>> WE BROKE UP.
>> Stephen: I CALLED IT.
WHO GOT TO KEEP THE SAMURAI SWORDZ.
>> SHE DID >> SHE DID, BUT I KEPT THE
BAMBOO ARMOR.
>> Stephen: WELL PLAYED.
SO, WHAT DID YOU THINK OF "MIKE AND DAVE NEED WEDDING DATES?"
>> I'M ON THE FENCE.
>> Stephen: SIDE-SADDLE OR STRADDLING?
>> STRADDLING.
>> Stephen: OUCH.
>> ON ONE HAND, THE MOVIE HAD COMEDY, ROMANCE, AND HEART, AND
A RAPID SERIES OF STILL IMAGES THAT CREATED THE ILLUSION OF
MOTION.
THAT PART GAVE ME VERTIGO.
I HAD TO LIE DOWN IN THE AISLE.
>> Stephen: SOMETIMES THERE'S SNACKS DOWN THERE.
>> ALSO, NONE OF THE CHARACTERS WERE SAMURAI.
VERY DISAPPOINTING.
IF THEY GAVE AWARDS TO MOVIES, IT WOULD DEFINITELY LOSE.
BUT THE ONE STANDOUT WAS AUBREY PLAZA.
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ) IF I WERE A MOVIE PRODUCER, I'D
KEEP BOTH MY EYES ON THAT ONE?
>> Stephen: BECAUSE SHE'S SO GOOD?
>> NO, BECAUSE SHE LOOKS LIKE SHE STEALS.
Y( LAUGHTER ) >> Stephen: MY ONLY COMPLAINT
WAS AFTER THE CREDITS, WHEN MY CAR WOULDN'T START BECAUSE I'D
LEFT THE HEADLIGHTS ON.
>> SO PREDICTABLE.
I GIVE "MIKE AND DAVE NEED WEDDING DATES" FIVE THROWING
STARS.
SPEAKING OF WHICH, BRENDA, GIVE ME BACK MY THROWING STARS.
THERE'S A RENAISSANCE FAIRE THIS WEEKEND.
AND YOU KNEW THAT.
>> Stephen: JILL, YOU KNOW THROWING STARS ARE NOT
RENAISSANCE-ERA APPROPRIATE.
>> I'M GOING AS A TIME TRAVELER.
>> Stephen: TOUCHE.
( LAUGHTER ) WELL, THAT'S A WRAP FOR THIS
EPISODE OF "NOT AT THE MOVIES, WITH ME, GIL PEACHES."
>> AND ME, JILL PEACHES!
>> Stephen: UNTIL NEXT TIME, SEE YOU NOT AT THE MOVIES.
>> I MISS YOU, BRENDA.
>> Stephen: STAY STRONG, JILL.