- Good evening folks.
Baby's asleep, husband's out in the town, so it's time.
Want a glass? (glass clinking)
- What do your solo activities look like now
especially in motherhood?
I love going on my hikes.
This is when I can clear my mind, work on my body,
and in the evening, I love doing my skincare routine.
Also, thanks to Estee Lauder
for sponsoring this portion of the video.
This is their Advanced Night Repair.
It's also one of my most favorite serums
that I've ever had the pleasure
of applying to my face.
Every time this chocolate colored bottle comes out,
it's that sign.
It's that signal that the day is over,
and I've done well,
and it's time to treat myself and my skin.
I love that this performs like seven serums in one.
You're hitting all these key benefits
from hydration, even tone, firmness, and more.
It has power peptide technology that triggers your skin
to repair so that it looks smoother and firmer.
It is so silky,
and my skin feels instantly nourished, hydrated, smoother,
and overall more radiant.
As you can see, it only takes a minute,
and with one application you can see results.
Skincare is something that I will always invest in.
So if you guys on the market for a new serum
check out Estee Lauder's Advanced Night Repair.
I'm gonna leave a link to that
on the screen right over here,
but also in the description box.
Check it out.
Thanks again to Estee Lauder
for sponsoring this portion of the video.
Now let's get back to my Q&A.
Do you think that the parasocial relationships
between public figures and fans are positive or negative?
Mm, this is a good question.
I think before we move on,
we should probably define what a parasocial relationship is.
It's essentially one-sided love.
Oh, my God.
It's when one person spends a lot
of their time, effort, and energy to the other person
while the other persona doesn't even know that they exist.
Traditionally, celebrities didn't show any time
of day to their fans,
but I feel like this day and age
with content creators, influencers, public figures,
I think that's shifted,
especially because it's like an interaction now.
It's like a two-way street
because we're commenting, we're DMing.
It's more of this ecosystem where both parties benefit.
And since I'm trying to be more of an optimist these days,
I'm gonna focus on the positives.
The viewer is entertained and feels connected.
They get to be part of the creator's world,
and the creator feels some validation, affirmation
for the work that they are essentially producing.
I think awareness is key in this situation
where we should know that we're
in a parasocial relationship.
And I think it's so important
that this relationship does not replace
existing friendships, existing relationships.
This is all supplementary,
like it should be in addition to your life,
not a replacement.
Viewers need to know
that the content that they're seeing is just
a small portion, a small slice of the creator's life.
And the creators need to have a like a sense
of responsibility of what they're producing
what message that they're sending across.
And to take a big slice of humble pie.
Get an ego check.
Do you think that the future
of content creation will be predominantly short form?
We should define this.
Short form content is little bite size pieces
of images and videos that we see on Instagram, TikTok.
It's the short and sweet content.
Long form content is like podcasts, YouTube,
Et Cetera. (crickets chirping)
- I don't know why I'm struggling
to find another example of a long form platform.
Call me old fashioned.
But I feel like there's always going
to be a place and home and viewership
for long form content
because I feel like
that's where people find the most meaning and connection.
Maybe with the short form content,
it will just kind of tickle my interest
on a subject, and then I'll learn more
about it through a long form piece of content.
Short form content is similar to an appetizer.
Like it's something that happens at the beginning.
It's something that wets my appetite.
It's like a yummy little snack.
It keeps me intrigued.
But then long form content is the entree.
That's where I get the full complexities.
That's where I get immersed in the topic.
That's when I get to know that person a little bit better.
Like we're hanging out.
I feel like long form content is
where ideas and information transfer more clearly.
Like it's harder to bull an entire hour
or two hours rather than 60 seconds.
How do I divide my content consumption?
It would probably be around 80% long form
and 20% short form.
It really depends on what activity that I'm doing.
I consume long form content when I'm driving,
when I'm hiking as I've said.
For those types of activities,
I don't want to be like constantly flicking
through people's pages and stuff.
I just want to set it and forget it.
But let's say I only have 15 minutes to kill,
then 100% I'm gonna go on like Instagram or something.
What do you think is the future of the influencer?
Personally, I think the career
of influencing is not gonna go anywhere anytime soon.
I think eventually it will probably taper down
because of AI creating content that is more enjoyable
for us to watch than someone that is human.
And I think that's like another theory for later.
But overall, I feel like influencing
and content creation is just gonna be seen
as a job where people just try and take a stab at it
because it is really fun to express yourself
through this medium.
Also, it's a way to make money.
I think influencing has pretty much replaced
traditional advertising,
and I think it's because influencers have more pull
because it's like a person that you know talking
about a product.
So I think many people are gonna try and take a stab at it,
and they're going to continue for as long as they enjoy it.
And once they stop enjoying it
or when it stops making sense, then they'll stop.
Ultimately, what will separate those who just
have a viral moment to someone that persists
in your life is meaningful, earnest content.
Fame is going to be seen in a different light.
I think what I was trying
to say here was that fame has now been democratized.
Andy Warhol was completely right when he predicted
that everyone in the future is going
to have their 15 minutes of fame.
Isn't that what a viral moment is?
Isn't that what a year of influencing is?
I don't know why I always do this
when I say influencing.
Fame has almost lost its luster.
It's subjective now because who I find famous,
who I find interesting is different from you.
We're all in our own worlds right now because when we flick
on our YouTube subscription or our Instagram algorithm,
we're all seeing different things depending
on what captures our attention.
So thought leaders and philosophers
that I think are just so universal aren't actually known
to everyone else.
And the people that you watch on short form content,
like I don't know who these people are.
I don't even know what my closing thought on this.
It's just an observation really.
I think the most powerful thing
a content creator slash public figure has is perspective.
Because I think a lot of people are afraid
to say what they think because they're afraid
of being criticized, ridiculed, picked apart.
So those with an opinion are the ones that kind of rise
to the top.
Do you feel like motherhood has gotten easier
or harder with time as your baby is growing up?
It's gotten a lot easier now that I have a year
of motherhood underneath my belt.
Not gonna lie.
The first...
Yeah, I mean you guys saw like the first like six months.
I was a freaking mess guys.
It was one of those things where you wanna try
your hardest to be the best that you can be,
but you don't know how because you've never done it before.
And now I realize that even me putting effort on trying
to be the the best mother that I could, that was enough.
And I could only say this in hindsight,
and each day Lennon is becoming more and more independent.
He's having more agency with his body
like he can walk now, which is freaking crazy.
And I know that he understands what we're saying
Like when we say, "Turn off the light,"
or "Turn the page," he knows.
It's just been so incredibly rewarding
to see his personality emerge
and just consciousness form from the beginning.
Like every day he is absorbing so much.
It's insane.
And so it makes me want to become the most stable
and clamorous version of myself.
Motherhood is harder because just when you think
that you've gotta figure it out
or you've like mastered a phase, it shuts.
He's onto the next chapter.
And everything that you've learned
about that particular part of babyhood
like breastfeeding doesn't matter anymore.
Like you never have to do it again
because he's like eating solids now.
So it actually really parallels life where it's very fluid,
and it's ever changing and you've got to be flexible.
Like the only consistent thing
about life is that it's gonna change.
What concerns you about the future
especially now as a mother?
I mean, aside from the obvious,
my biggest hope is that he's able
to find purpose and connection
in a world that is seemingly getting
increasingly more and more chaotic.
There are some days where my anxiety
about the future literally cripples me.
Like it's hard to focus on anything,
but then I realize I have a choice.
I can either just worry,
be paralyzed in fear and not do anything and just complain.
Or I can be active in my community,
in the way I raise him,
in the values that I instill in him
to make him antifragile, solution-oriented,
and empathetic to the world.
And I mean, aside from me being the best parent
that I possibly could
I want to really just open my eyes
to everything that's going on
in the world right now and understanding the full diagnosis
of the issues that are happening.
I mean, obviously it takes time,
but I think awareness and looking
at the problem straight on is a lot more
than other people are doing.
The next generation is desperate for people like this.
And so hopefully the the little changes
that I'm making now are going to make ripples in the future.
Folks, this is a proper late night meal.
I finally finished my kimbap, which is my mom's recipe.
And of course you can't have kimbap without ion.
They kind of go hand in hand.
All right, let's give this a bite.
You gotta eat it pure first and then you dip it.
(whooshing)
- And the last question, maybe the juiciest one.
What was something you learned you didn't want
from your past relationship?
Every single relationship
that I've been in has taught me what I want
in a future relationship
and what I don't want in the next one.
So I'm gonna bring up a lesson in no particular order
of the exes.
But this ex was someone that I've had my eyes on for years.
I had a crush on him for the longest time.
He was objectively beautiful, like just so handsome.
He should have been sculpted
and immortalized by Auguste Rodin in marble.
Anyway, he became my boyfriend. Somehow.
That honeymoon phase ended.
He was a sweetheart,
but unfortunately our conversations did not lead to much.
I remember we were at a Chili's,
this was like our final year together.
We were together for three years
but we were at a Chili's, and we were just in silence.
It was so, so hard to have a long conversation with him.
It just didn't go anywhere.
And I just felt so bored, like utterly bored.
And I was just like, "I can't do this anymore."
It eventually ended, and that was a big lesson for me.
I feel like what I saw being attractive just shifted for me.
It became less about how that person looked
and more about their personality.
Just what they found interesting,
how they carried on a conversation,
their curiosity, passion, drive,
the way they can retain information and spew it back out.
There's just more layers to it.
Luckily, I married a man who I am wildly attracted to
physically and mentally, emotionally.
Like their mind has to be just as sexy.
If anything, I feel like the mind is sexier
than the their external shell.
And so I feel incredibly blessed
to be with a partner like Ben
where I really get the best of both worlds.
And seeing him as a father.
Whew.
Like it's made me even more attracted him.
That's like one thing that I didn't expect about parenthood
'cause a lot of times you hear
that parenthood just drives people apart and you know
that like, "Everything was fine until we had kids."
But I think having Lennon has just made me more sure
about my relationship with Ben, my partner,
my life partnership with him.
All right guys, t is getting late.
I'm gonna inhale this off camera,
but I just wanna let you know
that I really enjoyed our time together.
And if you've been online for a while now,
please turn this off and go outside or go to sleep.
All right, bye. (kissing)