- Finish your (bleep) drinks.
(gong)
(orchestral music)
Alcohol.
- Whoa.
I like getting drunk,
I hate hangovers.
- Everything hurts.
- Try Guys are gonna try different alcohols
and compare them.
- We wanna see how different alcohols affect us.
- Four weekends.
Four types of alcohol.
- Watch out.
- [Keith] This is science, ladies and gentlemen.
Barely science.
- There's a lot of myths about alcohol intake
and there are some tips that you could use to be safer
that are based on research.
- Chaos.
- How're we gonna measure the quality of our drunkenness?
- One: How turnt are you?
Did I say that right?
How turnt?
- Two: The hangover.
How (bleep) do you feel the next morning.
- And three: The personal factor.
- My third factor is how hungry I get.
- I notoriously get wild and crazy when I get drunk.
- When I go out drinking with my wife,
we go home early.
- How much I talk to girls.
(offscreen whooping)
Do I...
♫ Havin' fun with a bicycle ♫
- [Keith] My favorite thing is beer.
You can just sit back, drink beer,
have good conversations.
- [Voiceover] Oh come on.
- [Eugene] We decided to move our drinking to a brewery.
- Beer contains more carbohydrates and calories
than some of the other alcohols.
- It's a conversational drink.
- It's so nice.
- It's a drink to be had with friends.
- So silly.
- It's absorbed more slowly
because the other calories that're being worked on.
- I wanted to kick off a little steam,
but I wanted to take it easy.
- I was (bleep) bored out of my mind.
Let's just continue drinking
and see where the night takes us.
(yelling)
- [Zach] This is the thing that Eugene does
is that, when he's drunk he just (bleep) leaves.
- It's not that I'm bored,
it's just that people are boring.
- We're his friends.
- We're his friends and playing Jenga.
- (bleep) Jenga.
(bleeps)
- [Keith] Ned was barely drinking.
- [Ned] I'm turnt city.
- [Keith] He wasn't drunk,
but he was so like, drunk.
- I feel hammered.
- Keith's hunger factor was good.
- [Keith] I get hungry guys.
I love to eat.
- [Eugene] Zach had negative girl points.
I don't think Zach talked to one woman the entire night.
And I talked to maybe 50.
- [Zach] Beer night overall, it was okay for me.
I didn't get too drunk,
I wasn't too outgoing,
actually, now that I'm saying this out loud,
it was pretty awful for me.
But no hangover, hey.
- [Keith] Good beer night.
- Good beer night.
- So we're about to go meet
at Chris Reinacher's birthday party.
- [Ketih] Let's get crunkified.
- To really do the test to see which would cause
the worst hangover,
you've gotta make sure that you're giving the person
equal amounts of alcohol in that beverage.
- [Zach] That's definitely more than a shot.
Very scientific.
- [Keith] Vodka sucks.
It's just (bleep) rotten potato juice.
- [Eugene] But I always associate it with
a really hardcore college party.
There's a gong in this house.
- Vodka night got crazy.
Vodka night got too crazy.
- Everyone get in the tub with me.
- Binge drinking can be very dangerous
and that's where someone takes a large amount of alcohol
in one day, in one sitting, or in one evening.
(laughter)
- I don't actually know how many drinks I had.
- This is out of control.
- Are you guys doing a weird experiment
at my birthday party?
- Yes.
(gong rings)
- Everyone take a shot.
- Something went horribly wrong last night.
- Vodka, duh.
- [Dr.Keith] That's where accidents may happen,
people's judgement
and their physical coordination is impaired.
- Mango chutney.
- I ate four sandwiches.
I became activated immediately.
- How many girls have you talked to?
- [Zach] I have talked to a few.
By Eugene.
- Where did he go?
- [Zach] Where does he ever go?
- [Eugene] Goodbye try guys at house party.
- Do you wanna bring them?
- [Eugene] They are not gonna go to the strip club.
- Why?
I am going to a strip club, will you guys come?
- What, no, we can't go to a strip club.
- Oh God we went to a strip club.
- Well I woke up this morning
with all of my makeup still on.
And this in my purse.
On vodka, there's only one thing you can do.
And it's go to a mother (bleep) strip club.
- [Zach] Sure enough, Eugene and Kelsey disappear
within fifteen minutes.
- We're super (bleep) cool.
- Vodka makes you irresponsible.
I drank more than I expected to,
stayed out way later than I expected to.
Being in a party environment
encouraged me to rage more with my friends.
- Night phone.
- They took all of my covers.
Dogs, stop being dogs.
- Quite frankly we don't know
what the underlying cause of the hangover is.
(groans)
- I don't think I drank enough water.
- Your thinking and your judgement
and your motor skills are impaired.
- [Keith] The doggies keep running on my face
when I take my face out.
- I feel pretty great.
No hangover at all.
(groaning)
Headed to a workout.
- I myself was surprised to find out
that there's a fair number of automobile accidents
that occur when they're suffering from a bad hangover.
- [Eugene] Do you guys like sleeping with Keith?
- Yes we love to keep him awake.
(orchestral music)
- Wine makes me want to be fancy.
- It's our third Friday,
It's wine day.
- Something we actually do pretty often
is we start drinking at the office
before we go out.
So Zach and I went to the liquor store next door,
bought a couple bottles of red,
one bottle of white,
because (bleep) white wine.
You've gotta let it aerate.
- Cheers.
- Just hangin' out, let's relax,
destress with some wine.
- It's been a Friday.
- [Eugene] Got some wine at the office,
drank there, some wine at Quinta's wrap party,
we drank there.
- Teeth check.
And gotta do tongue check.
- [Eugene] Then of course we went to a restaurant.
And I felt that that was where it was most appropriate
to have wine.
Free bred is like when someone you meet
just shows you their privates.
- I've never thought that.
At this point I'm realizing,
Man, I'm spending way, way more money.
- I've just ordered about $100 worth of food and drinks
for myself.
Problem two with drinking wine all night.
- [Dr.Keith] Wine can make you sleepy.
All alcohol is sedating, it's a sedative.
- [Ned] When my wife get's sleepy,
that means it's time for me to get sleepy.
- [Keith] Then I got home and I think I ate some potatoes.
- [Zach] Eugene ditched us,
as he is want to do.
To be honest, I was pretty grateful
for a relatively tame night.
- The next morning.
- Red wine in susceptible people,
can cause a headache.
- I woke up with the worst wine headache ever.
- Chronic headaches like migraines,
they're susceptible to headaches
and the red wine triggers it.
- A relatively tame night.
Tame night.
- Tequila shots.
- [Eugene] The quickest way to go from point A to point
(makes noise)
- This is dumb.
- [Zach] This is the one that I feared the most.
It's a double.
- Watch out.
- From a biological perspective,
you're gonna get a faster effect
and a slightly greater effect
from a single shot of hard liquor
as compared to wine and beer.
- I have to go to the airport
and I think I'm still drunk, oh no.
- What a time.
- To mistakes that will be made.
- We had tequila shots
and put little dots on our hands.
- [Zach] We're dancing,
all in my living room with my dogs.
Four shots in a little over an hour.
I don't feel drunk yet, which is the problem.
- [Dr.Keith] It's easy to get in over your head
pretty quickly with shots.
- I didn't feel anything and now I feel a lot.
- [Keith] The more I think about it,
I think all we did was take shots and dance.
(upbeat electronic music)
- Maximum amount of alcohol intake
that's considered healthy,
no more than five drinks in a 24 hour period for men,
and no more than four drinks in a 24 hour period for women.
(inaudible yelling)
- If you feel like you drank so much
that you don't remember what happened,
or you've done things that you later regret,
those are some of the warning signs
that suggest you could have a problem.
- I realized that because of the way I party,
I didn't really know what happened
with the other three guys the other nights.
Hey guys, I'm gonna try something
for the first time in my life.
I'm gonna drink responsibly.
Tonight I'm gonna stay with you three
and I'm gonna help you all achieve your objectives.
- This was the first night that I've ever gone out
drinking with Eugene
that he actually was like,
"You know what, I'm gonna hang out with you guys."
- Don't drink so much, have a little water,
and you could help one of your best buds get some action.
- Zach is totally makin' out right now.
- She's got two cats.
Yo, my friend Zach likes cats.
- I'm not the kinda guy who's gonna kiss and tell.
- His tongue was just plunging in her throat.
- Ned is giving money to the go-go dancers
with his wife's support.
- [Ned] I'm not good at this.
- What happened by the end of the night?
- We're headed home, gonna catch a plane tomorrow.
- Then the best part of all.
I am so happy.
- Burger.
- But the objective to be there with your friends
and have a good time
really changed the type of drinking night for me.
- Eugene went home, we're the real partiers.
- We are the winners.
(inaudible yelling)
- I go and pee in Zach's house,
we have one last goodbye,
and then I take my uber home.
- Keith will leave, so I win,
I'm the winner, I'm the best drinker.
Goodbye Keith.
I did it, I'm the best drinker officially.
Hey, it's me in the mirror.
(groaning)
- Good morning hangover.
- Oh my God I'm melting.
- Why am I awake?
- I have to go to the airport
and I think I'm still drunk, oh no.
- Pretty usual, I feel fine.
- 0.012, I am still drunk.
- I feel even better because I remember everything,
and I stayed with my friends the entire time.
- What I've learned through this entire experience
is that alcohol is poison and my body hates it.
- [Eugene] You can get too drunk on anything.
And that's just not safe.
- [Ned] You can have fun without alcohol.
- But if you are gonna drink,
make sure you're doing it in a situation that's safe.
Make sure that you're not gonna drive.
Don't drink alone.
- Drink at your own pace.
- Drink responsibly.
- Know your limits, don't push them.
- There's no point in having fun and drinking
if you can't remember any of it.
- Don't get too (bleep) up.
But get a little (bleep) up.
- [Zach] DADS are Day After Drinking (bleep).
- [Dr.Keith] The natural response of the body
is to try to get that out.
So both ends start to go.
- DADS are at like a level ten.