“Fa A’uzu Billahi Minash Shaitanir Rajeem Bismillahir Rahmanir Raheem.
Atiullah atiur Rasul wa Ulil amre minkum.”
And always a reminder for myself ana abdukal ‘ajeezu, dayeefu, miskinu, zhalim wa jahl,
but for the grace of Allah (AJ) that we are still in existence.
That everything is by Allah’s (AJ) rahmah and mercy and that we took a path in which
to be nothing.
Alhamdulillah in this way of muraqabah (spiritual connection) and making the Divine connection,
and requires a sincerity in which to take a hisaab and take an accounting of ourself.
That we…
we been deceived by shaitan (satan) all our life thinking that we are something.
And the accounting and hisaab and self-reflection, reflecting on oneself and finding people,
place and things that we dislike and that is a... the book of our notes of our understanding
of the self.
When we’re taking our notes it's that this accounting of myself is the people, places
and things that I don't like, that I have difficulties with and be honest with ourselves
of why we don't like them and tariqah (spiritual path) is only about finding my sickness.
It's not to find the sickness of other people and that's why everything comes back to myself.
And talking with the kids and young people they say, ‘No, no there's nothing wrong
with me.
It's wrong with all these people are really garbage people.’
Said, ‘That's, that's their problem but our problem is ourselves.’
Because Allah (AJ) doesn't change a condition of people until I change with what's in myself.
We want to focus on - the people are bad, this community is bad, this group of this
is bad but that's, that's not my concern, that's Allah’s (AJ) concern.
My concern is me, that what are the people, places and things that are affecting me.
Then I write that, ‘Why is it that I don't like them?’
They're this, they're that, and you truthfully begin to write, ‘Why is it?’
Because they have this, because they have that, because their focus was on this, their
character is not noble, they're all about money, they're all about dunya (material world),
they're all about… whatever people have of issues with people, places and things.
And then the key to that and the key to that success is – what is my role in all of that,
because I have to find my sickness.
I’m not here to state a political condition of a community and a society – that's not
the job that Allah (AJ) gave to people, but to find what is my difficulty and where is
the trap that I’m falling into.
So then they identify a person, or a friend and they can't stand that friend and because
maybe that friend has fancy car, has lots of money, always showing all that money.
Okay, but what is your role in not liking this person?
And then when the person is truthful to themself, their role is what?
Is jealousy.
Because what you have to do with that person having money or whatever they're doing in
life, that's their grave.
Allah (AJ) will punish whom He wants to punish but for our survival, my survival is about
me.
So when we deal with our children and we deal with our loved ones and we deal with ourself,
this is… tariqah’s (spiritual path) medicine that we take home for myself.
When Sayyidina Musa (as) was going to Divinely Presence he described to his tribe, ‘I am
going to go there for a warmth and for khabar (news) - for knowledge that I can bring back.’
So the tariqah is the same, is that what we gain from these teachings we implement for
ourself, for our families and we teach our children that in life make a book of the people,
places and things that you don't like.
The younger you can start that, as soon as the child has ‘aqel (intellect) and they're
in puberty, below that they may not make sense to them.
As soon as they enter into puberty, this system of an accounting is something we do on a daily
basis.
The younger we start, the cleaner we remain.
Could you imagine count... accounting for the first time after 40 years what type of
damages and characteristics you have to go through.
Right?
So the people, places and things.
It's very important for many people because their eyes are always looking at something
else, always looking for something wrong.
They can come into a store and find all of the… the products that are expired, right.
And then you go, ‘Hey all these products are expired... expired.’
But why you didn't think, ‘No shame on you that you didn't buy it before it expired?’
Right?
But you're always looking to the problem as something else, someone else's problem.
‘I’ll go through here find everything is expired especially it’s a zawiyah (spiritual
school of Sufism).’
Why is it expired?
Nothing should have expired?
You should have got it before it expired.
So this self-accounting its key is - my role in the accounting.
That, ‘I don't like this guy, he shows off all these things.
This like this, this like this.’
But what is my role, I want to know why my nafs (ego) is finding conflict in this issue
and then I have to identify with my sincerity and truthfulness and then you meditate.
That's why everything is based on meditation.
You make your connection, you ask for the madad and support so that you're not alone
with your nafs and shaitan but that your shaykh's ruhaniyat (spirituality) is right there with
you.
And that you're meditating and asking that, ‘These are all the things I’m disliking
for today, for last week’ what comes to my understanding and to my heart.
Why I don't like them, ‘He’s like this, he’s like this, this one shows off, this
one has this, maybe this one has this,’ and then the role I play is in the character
fault and the defect.
‘I don't like them because I’m jealous.
I don't like that person they have so much authority, I’d like to have authorities
and I’m jealous of them.’
A lot of people don't like people that work that are sort of in, they have a power, they
have a connection with the boss.
Why you don't like them?
Well because you want that power, you want that connection so you have jealousy, you
have enmity that you envy the person that you wish you had that authority.
So it's not so much that person is bad because that has nothing to do with us, that person
go wherever Allah’s (AJ) taking them.
My only concern is for myself and the community that following the teachings.
So I have to find the reason of myself being agitated by that place, that person, that
individual, that situation.
When I get good at that and I’m sincere with that and I did my meditation to do my
hisaab and I’m continuously making this hisaab because as soon as I can identify,
‘Oh I have a jealousy to this person and I have an envy and enmity towards this person’
means ‘I envy who they are, their authority that they have, the nearness that they have
to the boss and hmm…
I’m just jealous of that.’
Once I can identify that then the zikrs (Divine remembrance), the salawats (praises upon Prophet
Muhammad ﷺ) and the meditations can bear their fruit that, ‘Ya Rabbi take away this
jealousy in my heart, take away this characteristic.’
That this jealousy is not healthy because what Allah (AJ) gave to me I have to be thankful
because Allah (AJ) is the One whom is going to be disturbed that, ‘Why are you jealous
when I give you so much?
Why don't you thank Me and I give you more.’
Instead of bringing on satanic characteristics, have a shukr (gratitude).
“Alhamdulillah wa shukrunlillah”.
And identifying that, that that person and that reality that, ‘Ya Rabbi that that individual,
I’m feeling is I have a jealousy and please take it from my heart Ya Rabbi.
Alhamdulillah wa shukrunlillah.
That whatever You gave to that person that's between You and them Ya Rabbi but what You
grant of me and grant me…’ from what You have been given, ‘…alhamdulillah wa shukrunlillah.’
And if Allah (AJ) want to grant the servant more then by saying, ‘Alhamdulillah wa shukrunlillah,’
Allah (AJ) describe, ‘Thank Me and I give you more.’
So means that this builds our relationship and our reliance upon Allah (AJ), upon the
love of Prophet ﷺ that when we're meditating, ‘Ya Sayyidi ya Rasulul Kareem (The Most
Generous Messenger) that I’m identifying these characteristics, I’m coming to you
thinking I’m good and I don't want my inner hypocrisy.’
The reason for muhasabah and accounting in the meditation are hand in hand, that when
the person is sincere in meditating, connecting, feeling the connection there's now a truthful
mirror and in that time I’m gonna write, ‘Why is it I don't like this person?
Why this person just sort of bothers me?
Why is this place is disturbing to me?
Why I don't like to go to this?
I don't like to do that?’
And then we find what is the inner core, the inner reality and what's the role for myself.
Because we live in a society now where nothing is the self, ‘I’m great and everybody
else is damned, everybody else is rotten,’ but Allah (AJ) won't change the condition
of those unless I change my condition.
So if you don't want to be stuck around all these rotten types of things then there must
be a lesson that Allah (AJ) wants us to learn.
So once I begin to change myself, lo and behold, miracle - Allah (AJ) changes the condition.
So when we're not seeing the condition changing, ‘Oh this was…
I was just…
I’m identifying all these problems, all this, all this,’ but what's the role you
play in all of these?
When you find that role and you begin to fight that sickness with your salawats, with your
meditation, with your prayers, now you know what to pray for.
Say, ‘Ya Rabbi take away hasad - take away enmity, take away these bad characteristics,
take away pride.
That why is pride and anger coming into these things.’
When I can identify what these circumstances are, these conditions and I identify and pray
for these conditions and me to be gone then Allah (AJ) begins to give them, ‘You've
changed the condition within yourself, you're remedying the condition within yourself, you're
beginning to confront your sickness within the self’ and the miracle begins to change
in which Allah (AJ) begins to change the condition of that person.
That the environment for them they un…
[Connection lost] …their zikr, their salawats and their consciousness
they know now what they're fighting when they enter into that room of themselves.
They're not fighting the other person, they're not being a slave to that condition.
As a... as a person whom is meditating and contemplating on that reality then they should
be knowing…
[Connection lost] …just the understanding, ‘Okay I have jealousy issues, I have to
make my salawats and face this characteristic that Allah (AJ) take this away.
And that I be thankful and loving and submitting to Allah (AJ), He’s given to me everything.
He's given to me health, He's given to me wealth, He's given everything in proportion
to what I need.’
And that's when we said before that some people are so busy asking, they're really not praising
for what they have and it's a life now of just everybody's so busy trying to ask Allah
(AJ) and their whole mentality is on asking Allah (AJ) they lost focus on what they have
from Allah (AJ).
And that's why the muhasabah is immensely important.
People complaining, complaining, complaining about their rizq (sustenance), their rizq,
their rizq, rizq and then they make three times the rizq of normal people.
So human nature is something that never is satisfied, never is satisfied because that's
the role of shaitan.
That when you have nothing you say, ‘Oh if I just had a little bit I would be happy,’
then you have a little bit then you're still unhappy because shaitan is whispering into
you that, ‘You have to have more’ and everything in life is always, always, always
going and it's never enough and that's where then the danger of this dunya begins to trap
people.
And that's why the muraqabah, the meditation, making a connection so that the mirror of
truth is present with me when I’m contemplating.
If the mirror of truth is not present with me who will be present with me?
Shaitan and my nafs that, ‘You're great, you're good.
What are you worried about?
It's these people, it's all those people, it's all their fault, not my fault,’ and
that's where the sickness because Allah’s (AJ) not caring about their fault.
He's not brought us onto this earth to judge others but only judge ourself.
When we judge ourself then we can find our sicknesses, then we can see how busy we have
to be fixing all our sicknesses.
I don't have time to… to fix other people.
I have to fix myself.
And then people will be busy fixing themselves, identifying and writing - these are major
characteristics of mine.
You know if you have hasad, you have enmity most likely you have pride and you have anger
because anger is like a little pilot light that all these other characteristics when
they come they're like a gas, they hit the pilot light and the person is igniting.
Why people want to get angry?
Well because they have pride.
So something in the other characteristics ignited their pride that hit like a gas upon
this flame called anger - ghadab that immediately blows them up and here we go the fire is raging
and then anger takes the servant outside of faith and they lost their faith as a result.
They have to make their tawbah (repentance), they have to make wudu (ablution), they have
to make istighfar (seeking forgiveness).
As soon as you become angry, you're outside of faith.
There's no longer involvement with iman (faith), with Allah (AJ), with Prophet ﷺ.
So then these characteristics they learn they have to wash, they have to go make their wudu,
they have to pray Salatul Wudu (Prayer of Ablution) and regain their Islam.
They have now outside of Islam, nothing can be resolved outside of Islam.
So with their wudu, they make Salatul Wudu.
‘La ilaha illallah Muhammadun Rasulallah ﷺ’ and that they ask Allah (AJ) to regain
and come back into the station of faith.
And as a result with that then they're continuously combating these bad characteristics that are
igniting humanity left and right and becomes more and more difficult.
If we can start at a younger age by teaching ourselves and teaching our loved ones that
take a daily accounting of ourselves and find where we are involved, we're not here to account
for humanity, we're here to account for myself and my grave, inshaAllah.
Subhana rabbika rabbal ‘izzati ‘amma yasifoon, wa salaamun ‘alal mursaleen, walhamdulillahi
rabbil ‘aalameen.
Bi hurmati Muhammad al-Mustafa wa bi siri Surat al-Fatiha.