Hello, lovely ladies on my channel. It's Mark again and I'm here for another Ask Mark. And
if you don't know what this video is about, what the hell is happening, this is the video
where every single week I come on and I answer questions straight from you guys. So your
comments that you post in my videos, I pick a few every single week and I answer them
personally because I just love you guys so much for tuning in and commenting on my channel.
First comment is from Stella and Stella says Huck, I just had an awkward text. I haven't
talked to him since August. Okay. And I texted him yesterday, I wrote, Hey, how you doing?
And he said back, I'm fine and you then I said me too. And that was it. I had no idea
what to say back. Well, I'm not all that surprised, ah, Stella, yet yet. Let me give you, let
me give you a, an analogy to describe what's happened here. Now I don't have anyone with
me to film with today. So I'm gonna use this little robot, this guy, to demonstrate what
you've done here with this text. Okay? Ignore the phone role. Here's him. Okay, here's you
going, Oh, I've been thinking about him just, I shouldn't, I should text him, I should text
him something.
Hey, how you doing is not a useful text. It's a text where you say, I've been thinking about
you, but I'm too scared to actually invest properly and send a proper message to say
that I've been thinking about you. So the reason this text ended awkwardly is because
you gave no value with this text. There was, there was nothing in it. Hey, how you doing?
It's just kind of like a, I'm prodding you to see where you're at, but I'm not gonna
show real interest. If you haven't talked to someone for a while, send them something
positive that has value. Hey, how have you been? I've been doing like, miss chatting
to you, I've been having a really good time doing this and this, would be great to hear
how you've been. Send him something like that. Send him something with value. Yes, it's a
little scarier, but what you sent is essentially a way for you to kind of protect yourself
and make him do the investing.
And he said, well, bugger that you can do the investing. And now you've ended up in
this awkward text situation, so why not send him something like what I just said and reignite
the conversation, you know, in a really cool and interesting way. A second question is
from Raquel and Raquel says, Hey Mark, so I started talking to this guy on Tinder and
he was super interested in the beginning. We used to talk every day on Facebook. Uh,
it got to the point where he was saying that he wanted Jesus. He wanted to marry me after
a week. Okay. I knew that he wasn't in love, but it felt good hearing these things and
after month actually believed it and started having feelings for him too. Okay. Anyway,
later on, he started to lose interest and ignoring me, ignoring me every now and then
I let him have space.
Sure. And then after a while he reached out to me again. Okay. But after talking to me
for a week, he vanished again. And then a few weeks later I talked to him. But after
answering my message, he sent another one and when I answered it, he ignored me again,
I don't understand. I know that part of that is because I didn't do the right thing. I
guess I should've ignored him back a little to, to raise my value in his eyes. But anyway.
Do you think there is a way I could still get him to answer my texts? Um, Raquel, something
you said here, I guess I should have ignored him back a little too to raise value in my
eyes. To raise his value in my eyes. Look, I hate playing hard to get, I hate it. I think
it's weird. It's not genuine. I know other coaches teach it.
I just don't agree with it. I don't think you have to play hard to get, or manipulate
or fake disinterest to ever get a guy. If you are show, if you are being genuine and
you are showing interest and that interest isn't reciprocated, then you show interest
in other people who are going to reciprocate it. Um, don't, don't get focused on playing,
ignoring or playing hard to get you. You don't need to do that to get a good guy. When you
prioritize people appropriately as they prioritize you, you're going to go like this and you're
both gonna raise your value in each other's eyes without ever having to manipulate sort
of anyone. Um, this guy, by the way, he strikes me as the top. There's a, there's a type I
call the Romeo, which I haven't put in my Male Dating Personalities guide, you can find
the link to that in a description, but the Romeo is actually one I left out, but it's
a really common one.
And basically what it is, it's that guy that wants the high, he wants the feeling of being
in love, but he goes, he gets that high and he's like, okay, I've got the high of this
chick liking me. I'm going to go onto the next one and the next one. And they say these
crazy things like, I want to marry you after a week and get the girl to sort of fall in
love and tether her emotions. And then they move on to the next one. And this guy is hot
and cold pattern indicates to me that he's more in it just to, just to validate himself
by getting women off to him. Then he is to look for real love. So if he's hot and cold
in this way, um, bugger him. You shouldn't need to play hard to get to get a guy like
this.
So look, if you, if you want to send him a fun text from the guide, you can and he'll
probably answer it. But think about the, the quality of this guy. And my advice would be
go after man who isn't hot and cold and whom you don't have to play hard to get to be with.
Third question. The question is a really cool one. It's from um, it's from Mariana, Marianne,
sorry, Marianne. I've commented before in a previous video and I recently found out
that my boyfriend is cheating on me. I confronted him with the evidence and he didn't really
have any explanation except he kept denying he was cheating. I guess my question is why
doesn't he just confessed? I've opted not to speak to him, which is fair. And he's made
attempts to contact me. I don't feel like he would give me the answers that I need to
hear in order to really let go.
So my second question is how to let go with no closure, closure in this situation? First
of all, Marianne thank you so much for watching my videos and I'm so sorry to hear that this
has happened to you. To answer your first question, why doesn't he just confess? Well,
Marianne, his actions weren't much, shows he's not much of a man to me to begin with.
Any guy that is thinking of cheating or is having those thoughts, he could perfectly
easily come and talk to you. That's what a real man would do. Or at least he could break
it off. Any man who cheats always has those two other options of things he can do. But
instead, frankly, he was a pussy about it and he went cheating. So he was not much of
a man. And look, why doesn't he admit it? Same, same frigging reason.
Because he's shown he's not much of a man. He's shown he can't own his values. So the
only thing he knows how to do is deny. To answer your second question. So how do I let
go with no closure on the situation, Marianne, there's nothing he could say that's going
to answer your questions or give you real closure. Real closure has to come from you.
Real closure comes from you processing the situation and you getting through it in your
own thought patterns. No man can give you closure from a relationship. This is a mistake
a lot of women make. They think that our closure's going to come when I hear him say one more
thing and when I hear his explanations and then sometimes they go and they do hear one
more thing and they do get those explanations and it just makes them feel even shit up.
Closure can never come from a man. Closure has to come from you processing your own grief
for the situation. And as you look back on this situation and realize that the whole
time this guy was never, never a real man. He was never able to talk to you. He was never
able to even break up with you before he went and did something. He was just a pussy and
went off and did it anyway. His reaction to not confess it and just deny is not really
surprising. So I move on without him. Get your own closure. This is, this is about you.
This is not about him.
And the final question today, a little bit of a happy one. Happier one comes from Shabnam
ah and Shabnam says, I start to text this guy, but whenever he adds some flirty emoji,
I just leave his as unread, a as in, as in you've read the message right, but then he
texts me next morning saying, Hey, I mean, is it bad to leave him unread and why wouldn't
he ask me if I don't reply back? Um, so, um, I'm not sure if you're saying that he's texting
just the emoji or if he's texting some words with the emoji. If he's texting just the emoji
and you read it, that's, that's a pretty normal into a texting conversation. There's no reason
that a guy would, um, would wonder why you're not replying to that. Uh, even if you add
words, to be honest, and he's, and, and um, even if he has words and he sends you an emoji
as well, like it's, it sounds like the conversations kind of just ending there and that's fine.
As long as there's sort of nothing to reply to. Is it weird that the next morning he doesn't
wonder why you haven't replied back? Not really. It's just him kind of shrugging his shoulders
and going, okay, well, whatever. She didn't reply. I'm just going to text her in the morning,
which is kind of cool, but also from your end, but make sure you're not playing hard
to get here. I mean, like I say, it depends on how these conversations are going, but
there's no need to, this is, this is coming off very, um, I'm doing this strategy, this
way to try and make him feel this. Like if you want to text him back, just, just text
him back. If, if you don't, then you don't. But this weird kind of, Oh, I'm going to stop
replying every time he does this emojis, this is playing games, which I'm so not for in
date.
I know other coaches do teach it, but it's, I don't believe that you have to play games
to get the right person for you. And I, in fact, I think if you do play games, you'll
attract the wrong person for you. So reply if there's more to say in the conversation,
don't reply if there's not, and I guess appreciate that the guy is still initiating the next
morning because that's, that's a good sign. Meet up with him, stop having text conversations,
start calling him up or meeting up with him and then find out who he is as a person before
you wonder if he's worth more and you know, worth becoming a boyfriend and stuff. So thank
you all for sending in your comments. You guys are amazing and the comments are getting
better and better every single week. So thank you so much for getting involved with my channel.
Um, I absolutely love that you guys get involved and it really just makes me so happy and so
inspired to keep doing it. We've got heaps and heaps more videos coming out. Lots wants
featuring me, Jermia, some interesting, um, Q and A ones on their way as well. So lots
and lots of stuff for you guys, I'm really, really excited to get these ones out. Make
sure you subscribe and hit the little bell as well. So you get notifications when I put
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and keep the video a thumbs up and obviously comment. Remember I answer every comment even
if it doesn't necessarily get on the video. I uh, I take a lot of time each day to answer
every comment because I really want this community to grow and I want to spread this message
of positive self esteem, positive interactions with man and, and both genders coming together
to create this great dating atmosphere where no one has to play hard to get or manipulate.
So thanks so much, guys are, I will talk to you in the video next week. Leave your comments
again and I can't wait to see you all in the next video real soon.