Hey Dan here and today we have a question about setting goals and trying
to manage multiple goals at once it's quite an interesting one and it comes
from to us from Siena who says she is an INFP
personality type I'm wondering what happens if you have many goals or goals
in every area of life such as big health goals big creative goals professional
goals and personal goals that require lots of discipline I've been working on
myself with a therapist for three years but I found that when I addressed the
issues in one area for instance diet and exercise I was unable to focus on any
other area I felt like a leaky boat where you plug up one leak and Springs
another now I felt worse than ever this year because I felt like a failure your
videos give me some hope can you address address how to tackle a complete life
turnaround without burning out good question
so if I'm totally honest and that's what I try to be here this is an area I
struggle with as well in terms of balancing everything I can I'm not an
unhealthy guy I can go out and run you know 5k without too much problems but
health has been an area that I wanted to really push forward for a while now and
I haven't been and I found that for myself this is a terrible answer by the
way well the answer is it's hopeless but what I found for myself is I'm
really good at focusing in one area and making a lot of progress there so what I
try to do there and I know there are people who are kind of superhuman who
have goal lists and they have 20 different things they're trying to
accomplish like I want 5% body fat and double man coming all this and and they
often do it I don't know how it's impressive what I've found is I like to
pour my energy into something where I then build an asset and an asset can be
something in a business sense like a book or a new
training program or a bunch of videos for YouTube that are once they're done
they're done I like doing that from the business side on the personal side asset
can be like a habit or a big change you make so let's say you draw 20 pounds
what's that 8 kilo 9 kilo usually in theory that should stay I know there's
diet to rebound all that stuff but let's say in theory that stays so maybe it's
something where you really focus on that area you get your health together and
get in a little bit of a routine where you you know exercise 20 minutes every
day once there is a routine there and you've built that up it shouldn't take
nearly as much discipline or effort to maintain it and then especially with
something like exercise it will feed into your other areas of life and help
you with productivity and energy and that kind of thing that would be my
approach they've found that it's quite hard to go I think they found this
actually I may need to double-check the study but I believe it's generally
accepted that building multiple habits at once changing lots of different
behaviors at once is quite difficult changing one habit for you know it's
different studies say different things but somewhere between 20 and 60 days to
change a habit once you do that it gets set so I would focus more in one area
get that to be habitual so if it's exercise make it a habit that you do
every day once you're doing that and you've made that change then work on
something else personally I haven't had a lot of success trying to tackle lots
of things at once case in point my youtube channel is
going great as is my free freelancer program that book I mentioned six months
ago that was supposed to be done by now is
well but you'd know if I'd finish the book okay the book isn't done all right
so I would probably say don't beat yourself up so much and I know that's
not great guru advice I should say here's the ten steps and you can do it
and it's easy and there might be someone else who can help you with that
truthfully but in my own life I've struggled with this as well trying to do
a lot of different goals at once again once you make a change then it kind of
becomes autopilot and it's easy to maintain that the initial change is what
takes the effort and the discipline and so that's why I think there's a lot of
value and focusing on one goal at a time making that habit making it so it's easy
to keep repeating and then doing something else the other nice thing
about that is you mentioned feeling like a failure and that's not a nice feeling
I imagine and when I felt it myself I don't like it surprise surprise right so
one of the nice things about doing small goals one at a time or not even that
small but goals one at a time is that you don't feel like a failure and guess
what when you feel good about yourself when you feel proud you feel like you
can achieve things it makes it a lot easier to achieve things so that's what
I would also recommend doing is these small goals build like one thing up feel
good about yourself and then do the next thing and the other asset you're
building then is confidence and belief in yourself if you're always trying to
do too much and I know my fellow enfps we are often guilty of this trying to do
a dozen things at once and then not really doing any of them well then
feeling crummy and then yadda yadda yadda so do one thing get it done
feel better about yourself and then move on to the next thing that would be my
approach with it trying to do like an entire life transformation is tough
there are things that can definitely happen where you have a shift in beliefs
a shift in environment maybe you move cities and start working with a coat or
like have make some kind of radical change in your life like
and a terrible relationship sometimes when that happens you can see positive
changes in all areas of your life right if there's something really negative
that's been holding you back like a toxic relationship or bad belief system
or something like that definitely changing that can change a lot of things
at once so I should have thought of that at the
beginning of the video that's great so those of you who are watching to the end
you're getting the good stuff here so think about if there is something like
that like one and this may require I'm not doubting my own services here
although if you want to work with me dreams around the world calm slash
coaching but it it might require spending some time with a coach or like
a really good friend or family member who knows you really well who could
maybe identify one what that is if you do have like a limiting belief or
something like that that is affecting all areas of your life eliminate that
first but once that's gone in terms of then kind of gradually building up the
different goals and making better habit I think one at a time is the better way
to go it's just yeah that would be my my case now once you build things like
let's say exercise you talked about right once that becomes a habit where
you become a healthy person and you just tend to eat pretty well and exercise and
that then you can still have an exercise goal and now another goal in a different
area of your life because the exercise part should already sort of be
integrated and not be that hard to maintain right that would be my my
theory with it my thought on it I could go on but it would probably become even
more randomly than this video has already been if you are an ENFP watching
this you know why I'm rambling because you know that we do our best thinking
out loud and actually process information by talking it through and I
will admit for some of these ass down videos that's what I am doing is
processing and going through it as I'm answering hey don't be mad at me it's
effective time management here thank you for watching if you've been
enjoyed this you've stuck around this far please subscribe to the channel I
would love to have you join us in some of the other videos and if you do have a
question you would like me to answer you can head over to Dreams around the world
comm /a Stan and share it with me there thanks for watching