Transcriber: Konan N'Guessan Matthieu KOUADIO Reviewer: David DeRuwe
How many of us have traveled alone in the past?
I’m sure some of us have, right?
Well, the other day I was with my friends,
and I told them that I was going cycling alone.
Their reply was, “You’re going alone?”
Their tone was suggestive of an ardent negativity.
Most people think that going to the cinema,
the restaurant,
or traveling alone is sad and depressing.
For them, it means you have no friends.
And this shook me.
Unfortunately, this generates a host of doubts in people.
He’s an introvert.
He’s a loner.
But can’t we be happy just by ourselves?
Can’t we be alone for some time?
Some time for ourselves?
If I ask you to go somewhere, right,
find a place to sit for one hour with no distractions, no smart phones,
what do you feel?
You would find it hard to stay without your phone, right?
You feel like leaving immediately.
You feel alone.
You feel detached.
You want to socialize.
This is called loneliness.
You can’t bear being alone.
You want to talk to someone. You want someone to be there with you.
This is different from solitude.
Loneliness is a negative term and solitude, positive.
Solitude is when we are fulfilled being alone,
even when there are no distractions, no smartphones, no Wi-Fi.
Yet you are happy and contented.
That is the state of solitude.
It is not being alone that worries us;
it is feeling alone that worries us.
Being alone is an opportunity to get to know ourselves better.
If you want someone to fall in love with you,
you have to fall in love with yourself first.
(Cheers) (Applause)
We try to know about others’ interests before our own.
We try to know what makes others happy, before we know what makes us.
This solitude is your time to chase your personal growth,
your passions, your potential, and your purpose.
Remember,
the most important meeting of the day is the meeting with yourself.
The most important call is to yourself.
When you’re able to interact with yourself,
understand your emotions,
and navigate your mind,
you are starting to be comfortable alone.
I read a study in The Washington Post
where men and women were given the option
to spend 15 minutes alone with their thoughts or shock themselves.
Roughly 67% men and 25% women
chose to endure electric shocks than spend some time with themselves.
Instead of using an escape,
instead of finding another person or thing to get attached to,
learn to be comfortable and at peace with your thoughts.
We are only virtually connected
when we say we are connected to many on social media.
We seem to be very happy from the inside,
but deep within we’re getting lonelier day by day
because the real connections are missing.
Didn’t I mention you can be happy alone?
Happiness comes with contentment.
If I’m satisfied with my life, I will be happy.
And that satisfaction comes when I start thinking
that the life that I’m living is still a dream for many others.
So, be grateful for whatever you have.
Stop living inside your phones.
Find happiness within yourself.
Connect with yourself.
Solitude is a wonderful thing,
as long as you can talk about it with someone afterward.
Thank you, everyone.
(Applause) (Cheers)