getting my life together for as much as
I've said this phrase to myself in my
daily life and use this as a title of my
videos
I have some thoughts about this phrase
it's low-key toxic but before we dive in
let's first break down how it all
started
thank you Shopify for sponsoring this
video more on this later
I first saw Kayla Nicholson's videos in
2017 which was around the same time I
made my first how to get your life
together self-care routine that went
viral I continue to make these types of
videos because I genuinely enjoy making
resetting videos and I also genuinely
believed I had to get my life together
over time I'd fall back on this magic
phrase and add it to my video titles
whenever I needed a little boost in
views and before I knew it this new
style of content that was once genuine
raw and exciting slowly turned into
trying to keep up with the algorithmic
hamster wheel I also wasn't alone in
finding a little boost in views with
this video title creators within our
corner of the interwebs all started
making videos with similar titles as
well and I'm by no means taking credit
for the proliferation of this phrase nor
am I picking on anyone who has or still
uses this phrase I simply want to
illustrate how the phrase Grew From
something honestly quite harmless and
cute to something much much bigger
[Music]
it became something aspirational it
became a part of our subculture so
what's the appeal of getting our lives
together you tell me no actually please
let me know in the comment section below
from a viewer's perspective my
hypothesis is that the title appeals to
all of us because it's a universal
feeling we feel like we're a mess our
apartment's a mess our life is falling
apart along with our mental state we're
falling behind our inbox is overflowing
and we're not doing nearly enough
perhaps it's satisfying to know that
this is something another human is
working through as well
and that we're not perfect perhaps it's
satisfying to see a mini transformation
happen before our eyes from the
beginning of the video to the end
offering us a glimmer of hope and
inspiration
but what if the very concept of needing
to quote get our lives together is
what's holding us back from actually
having a togethered life
I feel like
it's good to want to work on yourself
that awareness is already the biggest
step
I just want us to be mindful of how we
talk to ourselves as well to feel like
you need to get your life together to
feel like you need to heal yourself to
feel like you need to do all this inner
work means that your life is sinned
together means that you are quote
unquote not healed or like some part of
you is not whole so you need to hear
heal yourself
that train of thought we're already
setting ourselves up for failure as
opposed to I am whole my life is already
together but sometimes things get messy
and I feel a little meshy but it's okay
and I just pick things up from the floor
and like I move on with my life
that was a snippet from our podcast
voice hugs which beautifully sums up my
thoughts the negatively framed self-talk
even if it's minor Amplified across the
internet Gathering millions and millions
of views accumulated in all of our
psyche over time to become the norm
we're left stressing over what's going
wrong and reactively playing catch up
forever rather than figuring out how to
grow and proactively move forward
so how to move forward as I shared in
the podcast it's really as simple as
reframing our perspectives and becoming
more aware of how we talk to ourselves
of course easier said than done but
awareness is always the first step to
change and we'd be surprised even though
we shouldn't be by how far A little act
of kindness to ourselves can go this is
what I've been telling myself if the end
goal is to get this thing done you have
the power to control how you get there
do you want your journey to be riddled
with anxiety guilt and shame or do you
want your journey to be filled with
calmness peace and joy if I need to
clean up my apartment I just clean my
apartment if I'm falling behind on work
I make time to catch up I'm not a messy
human being whose life is falling apart
just because my apartment and work are
not as quote together as I like it to be
since I've sworn off using the phrase
getting my life together and focus
instead on small ways I can set systems
to improve my daily life something very
magical happened
the five minutes of tidying every night
left my apartment consistently clean for
months and you guys know this is a big
big feat the 10 minutes of review my
calendar every Sunday gave me peace of
mind for the upcoming week and because
my apartment is already clean and I'm
feeling relatively on top of work I can
actually have a day or two off over the
weekend to do anything
not being in a constant state of needing
to get my life together and untogether
gave me more space to breathe reflect
and dream with the breathing reflecting
and dreaming over the past few months
I've come to a couple of important
realizations
realize
I've been stagnant for a while you know
it's like everything that was once New
To You becomes something that's
comfortable
so even though YouTube in the beginning
is like very uncomfortable it became
comfortable so I think I'm in a place in
my life where I want to be bolder I want
to be more courageous I want to start
scaling mountains again I want to go
explore again
[Music]
and it's no surprise that I recently saw
this reposted on my friend's story
you're not afraid of doing the thing
you're afraid of the feeling that might
come up if you do the thing get in touch
with your feelings get better at sitting
with and navigating discomfort and
you'll do more things like being Bolder
and more courageous it's more often
rejection abandonment failure discomfort
embarrassment or a whole host of other
things that we're afraid of not the
actual thing work to get better at
sitting with the discomfort that comes
along with putting yourself out there
its presence actually often paves the
way to growth the key is just to start
doing that's the only way you experience
the Heat or embarrassment of putting
yourself out there and realize hey it's
okay so then you try again and sooner or
later it doesn't feel like that big of a
deal anymore
so get clarity on what you feel may be
holding you back acknowledge it honor it
give space for it and go out to do that
thing anyway to put my thoughts and
dreams into action here's what being
Bolder and more courageous actually
looks like for me socially
professionally and personally as some of
you may know your girl has mastered the
art of saying no over the past couple of
years to be able to solely focus on what
she deemed as important but in this
season of being bold and courageous I'm
training myself to say yes
if you've been following my Vlogs on my
second Channel Rowena comma 2. I've been
saying yes to socializing putting myself
out there going to events and actually
feeling very full and energized as
someone who usually gets drained from
being around others had I stayed my
introverted anti-social no saying self I
would never have come across the sole
enriching conversations I was able to
have and to form the connections I was
able to form
on top of socializing I've also been
saying yes more to cool opportunities
like creating my very own potato
popsicle for a huge Creator conference
this was actually why I flew back to LA
Shopify has an easy to use Lincoln bio
tool called link pop so they teamed up
with six creators to create popsicles
this is honestly such a pinch me moment
because what's a potato doing in the
presence of some of the biggest creators
like Mr Beast and Eric when I first
shared the news with my designer shout
out to Dre check out her work website
and Instagram link down below she sent
one of the sweetest texts saying isn't
it amazing that all the work you've put
in from all the years of your life has
led to A Moment Like This your name on a
popsicle
tears
and since we've been working on some
designs for Merch
hint hint we're able to send over these
team potato Graphics to be included on
the packaging along with the guava
flavored pastel purple potato pop thank
you guys for making this possible what
makes link pop different from other
Lincoln bio tools is that it's designed
to promote shopping from the start for
example you can see here that as I check
out to buy this Popsicle for zero
dollars I can buy it directly without
ever leaving the Lincoln bio in a
nutshell with link pop you can send your
visitors and followers to a curated
collection of your best links so if
you've been meaning to be bolder and
more courageous yourself and growing
your business you can turn your
followers into customers by adding
shoppable links to your page to sign up
for free go to linkpop.com or the link
in my description
lastly personally when it comes to
creating content as I shared earlier in
the video I've been feeling a bit
stagnant and uninspired largely due to
momentarily losing sight of my North
Star which is to give hope to my younger
self that things can and will get better
if you trust in yourself and something
much much greater than yourself to
unstagnate thyself I've been thinking
about what types of content I like to
create and one topic I've talked about
all year has been trying commentary
Style videos the intro of this video was
my first mini attempt I've also been
outlining and researching For an
upcoming commentary Deep dive into the
evils of tick tock that I can't wait to
share and yes evil is a very strong word
but it's very appropriate and very
necessary and you'll see why another
style of content I like to create more
are Vlogs even though I haven't been
posting as much here on my main Channel
I've been posting more vlogos on the
second Channel I started this Vlog
channel on my birthday in December last
year with the goal of uploading 52
videos for the 52 weeks of 2022 we're
currently only on Vlog 2 but whether I
was able to stick to my goal or not
isn't the point here the point is that I
started doing the thing of posting again
and I will continue to do
Beyond content something else I've been
thinking about these days has been what
does it truly mean to listen to your
heart over the past few months I've been
spending a lot of time with babies and
they're just they're just a ball of Joy
doing whatever they want whenever they
want seeing this got me thinking to my
childhood what were things I naturally
gravitated towards and what were things
I wanted to do okay so the thing that I
want to try I'm just going to say it and
speak it to existence the more I talk to
people about it the more it's out there
before I say what it is let me just
share in middle school I did Sports I
did drama Productions when you go to
high school you can still choose right
so I still did a little bit of like the
drama Productions part where it's more
speech and debate there's actually like
a real drama club but then I was like
whatever the cool kids are doing sports
so let me play volleyball and so I did
volleyball I did student body and I did
the speech and debate thing it's exactly
what you said I chose to do something or
to not do something because it was cool
or it wasn't cool and the thing I want
to revisit now that I feel a calling
deep within the depths of my soul is to
try acting again I've been talking to
friends who have been in the industry
for decades I've been devouring books
watching online videos from the greatest
like Michael Kane and Larry Moss I've
been looking into coaches which is
objectively not a big deal but it's a
very big deal for me because I've lived
my whole life convinced that I can do
everything on my own all that to say
this is a very full circle moment
because my mom was low-key and a pretty
big Netflix movie that was filmed at
this very location
[Music]
so to summarize this whole video once
we're able to reframe and move away from
this need to constantly get our lives
together it truly opens the door for us
to dream and to wonder for me that
manifested as me wanting to be bolder
and more courageous for you it could be
anything and as soon as we're moderately
clear on what things we like to do go
out and do that thing remember we're not
afraid of doing the thing we're afraid
of the feelings that might come up if we
do the thing so lean into your feelings
make peace with discomfort and go do
that thing anyway as our last parting
words I want to share what one of our
dear voice hux listeners wrote to us
I'm whole and my life is ready together
I just need to work little by little to
make it more meaningful and fulfilling
to me
and with that it's been a while my
friends I've missed you guys I hope you
guys enjoyed this video
here is a place a vlog of this day will
be on the Vlog Channel when it's up
it'll be up I don't know when and I'll
see you guys next week bye