I can't stand my son-in-law. My name is Paul Friedman, I founded The Marriage
Foundation I'm going to try and give you some really practical and beneficial
guidance for this. If you can't stand your son-in-law, you're a troublemaker
let's start with that because your son-in-law is already married to your
daughter then there's just no getting around it. So, what can you do? And I can
tell you just mind your P's and Q's just be quiet but I don't think that's enough.
I want to give you some real serious help here. There are for everything
that's going on there's always pros and cons. So, what are the cons of not liking
your son-in-law? The cons are that you are automatically not just questioning
but you're criticizing your daughter's judgment. Your daughter's judgement in
the arena of the biggest decision she's ever made in her life, the biggest
decision we've ever make in our life is who we choose to marry because it's free
will. It's not compelled. Your daughter -- you loved her when she was born
she's your daughter. When you married your husband because this is never a man
writing this in, when you married your husband it was your free will, it was
your choice unless it was an arranged marriage but let's put those aside. Your
daughter chose to love, honor and be the wife which is really big to your
son-in-law. If you are now saying you can't stand him, you are blankie at least
my daughter is an idiot and if she knows that you can't stand him
you are distancing yourself from your daughter because she's in a quandary. She
was your daughter without free will, same way you were her mother. She had no
choice with you but she used her choice with her husband and you're telling her
that she's an idiot that she made a huge mistake. Is that what you want? It doesn't
take a genius to figure out how this is going to end up for her. If she listens
to you and she's going to pick up on your thoughts and feelings through your
behavior which is going to tell her how you feel about him. You don't want this.
You need to shift. You need to understand that even though he's not a doctor or
the president of the Dental Society or whatever aspirations you have for your
daughter's husband he has qualities that she has found that
fulfill her. And for that reason alone, you are better off honoring him and
loving him, it's not your place to judge him. And when these ideas come up in your
mind these critical ideas of him, no matter what he does I don't care even if
he cheats on her, you need to make yourself love him. You need to punish
your mind for getting in the way of your daughter's happiness
not through actions but through sincere changes in your perspective. It won't
hurt you to read one of my books because there's a lot of information in there
about how to control your mind and that's what we're talking about here. You
need to learn how to control your mind but I'll tell you for sure you're
screwing things up by holding on to these feelings towards your son-in-law
and you can tell me he's a bank robber. I don't care, it doesn't matter. The
relationship between you and your daughter because she's an adult and has
made her choice should change from when she was a little girl who you used to
guide on everything. That's all I'm going to say about this. I want what's best for
you, for your daughter and for your son-in-law so look at this a little more
deeply. Try to take into account what I've shared with you. Blessings to you
blessings to your family, blessings to your daughter, and blessings to your
son-in-law. Share this if you will maybe with your daughter, your husband.
Like it and leave a comment if you want. You can complain to me, I can take it.
Thank you! God bless!