hello friends welcome back to my channel my name is christine i'm excited to do a
little chatty get ready with me today and talk about confidence
i've become a lot more confident in my body how i look and all that and i think
you can really see that through my pictures on instagram
here on my youtube as well so i wanted to do a chat to get ready with me talk
all about confidence some of the jobs that i had and some of the things that
really helped me to be a little bit more confident in myself
some tips that you guys might find helpful as well so if you are interested
first make sure you hit the subscribe button if you haven't already and the
little notification belt without further ado let's go ahead and get started
if you guys have watched some of my recent videos i recently have gotten
bangs i just don't really take the time to
style them this is just what you get today i also got eyelash extensions so
getting ready has been super super easy i'm not really gonna talk through
the makeup just because i want the focus to be a little bit more
on the topic i just got back from new york a couple days ago so i am working
on my new york city vlog it was supposed to be a big girls trip
but with everything that's going on with the coronavirus and stuff like that
everyone ended up wanting to stay home just to be safe so it was just me
and i totally understand because especially with like a worldwide health
crisis but i had so much fun while i was there
it just makes me want to come back to new york because i just had
so much fun while i was there and i really only had one day to fully
explore but i was mainly there for work i had a couple meetings while i was out
there so it was good that i still went with the
trip i ended up booking a flight home early
okay anyways i started putting on my primer something that i put on earlier
started peeling up and i just can't stand when products on my face
start peeling up so i ended up just washing my face really quick i was
trying out a new first aid beauty mineral sunscreen
and that was the stuff that was filling up so i reapplied some of my super goop
glow screening which i know doesn't do me any wrong so now my face isn't
peeling as much anymore colourpop a while ago came out with this pretty
fresh hyaluronic tinted moisturizer and they sent me a couple so i want to try
them out today i was also hanging out with one of my
girlfriends in new york and she was asking me about hyaluronic acid
because of the name acid she thought it was something that would like
be really harsh on her skin but hyaluronic acid is actually something
that is great if you have dry skin or you want
something a little bit more hydrating is actually an ingredient that helps to add
a little bit more moisture to your skin so don't be
fooled by the acid in its name i have here the shade 13w i also have the shade
14w but i think i would probably be something like this at the moment
packaging is super cute oh yeah it looks like a good match
by the time you guys see this video my new york vlog will already be up so i'll
go ahead and link that but i had such a great time and brandon i definitely want
to come back when the city is like not in
lockdown anyways to talk about confidence
in high school i was really really insecure so
i actually had pretty bad skin and it was something that i was really insecure
about i was also super shy i feel like all
throughout high school i had pretty toxic friends no one was actually super
genuine i always had those groups that felt like if i wasn't there hanging out
with them i knew they were talking crap about me
i don't know why i continued to hang out with those people which is like some of
the people that you go to elementary in middle school with you i mean and you
just keep hanging out with them because it's
convenient i always relied on dating a guide to kind of
make me feel a little bit better about myself and all throughout high school i
was always with someone i was never really single
for very long freshman sophomore year of high school i was with an older guy that
he would always be with like multiple girls and i would always be like one of
many and it never really was super good for my
self-esteem and i just never really felt like i was good
enough and then junior and senior year i started dating a guy and we dated for
about three years he also was considered a
cool kid and was always super flirty and talking
to other girls and never was like up front to me about it so it always just
made me feel super insecure also like i was never really good enough so i feel
like a lot of high school just wasn't really that great for me i
had such toxic friends i was really really shy and it just didn't help that
the relationships that i kind of forced myself
in none of my relationships ever like supported me
as a woman so after high school i continued dating that guy
he ended up going to ucla while we're dating i was going to uw
this guy actually got into a frat and we actually ended up getting in a huge
argument because he wanted to continue doing date dashes which if you aren't
familiar with like the whole sorority fraternity thing it's just like
one of those events that they do where they'll take a
girl from a sorority out to dinner to dance whatever and then
they'll come back and all party together while we were dating my boyfriend at the
time he wanted to go on these date dashes
because it was part of his like fraternity
and he didn't want to feel left out it was just kind of a big fight that we got
into which now looking back is so ridiculous if you're dating someone and
they want to go on other dates with other people that's super problematic
so we ended up getting a really big argument broke up and then
i started going out a lot and i met brandon him and i
started seeing each other really fresh after my breakup and i wasn't ready to
date anyone at the time so brad and i were actually
we were kind of just like friends for a while like really really flirty friends
and then i would say about six months later i started developing
feelings for him shortly after that we started dating if you guys watched my
video on like my breakup brett and i actually ended up breaking
up about two and a half years into our
relationship and i think that was kind of like
a big pivotal point in my life because i think it was the first time i had ever
realized that i needed to work on myself i would just
highly recommend checking out that video because
i talk a lot about like getting over that breakup and like things that i did
to kind of help myself grow a ton and just going through
a lot of really failed relationships and then having to take a break from someone
that i really saw a future with brandon really
helped me to grow a ton and then brandon and i once we
started to get a little bit more serious we moved in together and after we broke
up i moved out into a house with some roommates if you guys have been
following me for a long time that's where some of my old youtube videos were
i started my youtube channel in my little room of
this like it was almost like a frat house and i
lived with all these guys that i used to work with and they are like brothers to
me but that was a really great experience
because i feel like moving out and living with
roommates is such a fun experience and i feel like a lot of people experience
that in college and so moving into a house with roommates with
all these guys that really kind of thought i was cute i think was
really great for my confidence and some of the jobs i picked up too were really
great for helping me with that because i
became a server i did a video recently talking about some of the jobs i had if
you are interested in that i'll go ahead and link it up in the corner
i ended up just really blooming learning to
get outside of my comfort zone working so many jobs also kind of forces you to
make friends with your co-workers uh be super friendly
with strangers and be able to think on your feet
being able to hold a conversation with like a stranger having
some retail job restaurant experience i think all helped to really develop
my kind of confidence and i think with the more
jobs i had i slowly got more and more confident talking to strangers
with caring myself and kind of feeling like i was no longer that like
super awkward weird girl from high school that really didn't have a lot of
friends i think it's always really really great
to work a ton of jobs because i just feel like all that really helps to build
your confidence and then i also had a couple friendships
throughout college that were super toxic and i ended up cutting out
stopped talking to the girls i talked to in high school and i feel like it was so
important for me to cut off those friendships because i just felt like
all of elementary middle and high school i kind of just kept the same friend
group because it was comfortable but once i got a little bit older and i
got to college to maintain those relationships you
really had to go out of your way to maintain those friendships because i
knew that those types of friendships were toxic and those friend groups i
just didn't really want to put in that effort
if it wasn't going to be like anything genuine or people that didn't make me
feel good about myself so i stopped putting in the effort there and it kind
of just made me realize that you don't need to continue to have
friendships with people that are toxic there's no reason for you to maintain
those friendships and go out of your way to hang out with these
people if they don't support you and make you feel good about yourself
ever since i started cutting out some of the people that i kind of grew up with
it made me a little bit more picky with my friend's circle
i actually had a girlfriend that her and i were best
best friends and we hung out all the time we actually have like a couple
youtube videos together way way back in the day but
her and i are no longer friends because she was also very toxic and really
problematic i just am super picky now with my friend
group i value myself i value my time and
energy and if there aren't people that are able
to reciprocate that time and energy it's just not someone that i want to
really keep near and dear in my life that is just
something that i slowly learned kind of being super confident in who
you are as a person for example i know that i'm a great friend i put a lot of
time and effort into people that i value and they reciprocate that i know i
deserve and i've been through so many toxic relationships and friendships
i know i want a certain standard i expect a lot of the time and effort that
i put into my friends for them to kind of put that back into me so being
picky with my friends have allowed me to kind of curate a circle of people that
are really great people that really are genuine
and support me i think that has also helped to build
my confidence a lot just knowing that i'm surrounded by really good people and
i have the power to cut off anyone that is
toxic just because i feel like sometimes especially when you are like dating
someone that is toxic or you're in kind of a bad
relationship but you have so much of your life is intertwined with them
for example when brad and i were living together and so much of our lives were
connected but we knew our relationship was bad it was kind of hard to get out
of that just because we knew so much of our lives were together and
it was just comfortable i feel like the same kind of goes for friendships
when you have only like one best friend and she's toxic it's hard to
get that out of your life because you don't want to get rid of like the one
friend that knows everything about you so for me
it's really helpful to kind of be super picky in the beginning
kind of make sure that the people that i hold really near and dear people that i
fully trust people that always reciprocate all the love and energy that
i give back out to them okay also um i don't know if i like that
colourpop tinted moisturizer because it was kind of kicking
up around my pore area and then when i added
a little bit more extra powder to kind of set it in place it just made my pores
look really really enhanced and bad i'll have
to keep playing around with that i've never really had
much luck with colourpop like face products
in the past they had a ton of questions kind of about
jealousy and i feel like that all goes into
having confidence because when brandon and i first started dating
he kind of did stuff here and there that was a little bit sketch
he was a little bit of a playboy and couldn't really
commit to like just me for a while so if you've ever been
cheated on or hurt or in a bad relationship
it's kind of hard to get back to trusting that person
if you're easily jealous of your boyfriend or girlfriend that might not
even be because you're insecure it might just be
because you've gone through a lot i think it's good to have that talk with
your significant other and kind of help them understand that
whether it was them that caused you to be like extra
cautious and have trust issues or someone else that you have been in a
relationship with it's important for them to be able to understand
what you've been through and how it's hard for you to trust
them and it's not something that they should take personally it's just
something from experience you've had kind of a bad experience with and so
they should always be super understanding of that so in this case
a lot of the relationships that i had been to prior to brandon were really
toxic i had been cheated on before with brandon he himself had done a
couple sketchy stuff and he has cheated on me not just one
time but a couple times and i feel like whenever you go through something like
that it really does take a hit on your confidence your
self-esteem how you feel about yourself and also
how willing you are to trust the next person you
date i made some mistakes he made some mistakes and obviously we are
much better having learned from them brand i sit down and talk about it all
the time how whenever he does anything that makes me
feel even like the slightest bit of like
insecure it kind of just brings all those feelings back of all the times
when he did do me wrong so whoever you're with they have to be
able to understand and maybe to be a little bit more
accommodating than usual to kind of help you
trust them a little bit more so in mine in brandon's case he
is able to understand and he's learned from his mistakes so
moving forward i can trust him wholeheartedly with anything that he
does after him and i broke up i also was
dating around kind of just figured out like men really
aren't shit like i was really with a lot of crappy guys guys who just thought
that they're all that and also seeing multiple girls while talking to me and
that's just a reality of dating it sucks but you have to realize that you deserve
better and i think when i was dating around i kind
of realized like i don't really have time for bad crappy relationships
i know what i'm worth and i know what i deserve
and i deserve a lot better than a lot of what these guys are giving me when brand
and i got back together i kind of made it clear that
these are the expectations that i had and you just have to accept that no one
guy is perfect if you talk to any couple them as a couple have been
through a lot just like me and brandon on instagram we may seem that we have
so much figured out but the reality is is that when we first started dating we
were both very problematic we've been through a
lot of ups and downs together but that's just how all relationships are
you have to be really patient be able to work through a lot of these
things together and also as a woman you have to be patient to
kind of train a guy and what i mean by that a
lot of guys kind of don't really know how to date or treat a
woman correctly and a lot of them especially younger ones kind of just
want to date around and fool around i don't know it's kind of a tough topic
because you have to be able to balance like knowing you deserve better but also
being able to have the patience to kind of work through some of the issues that
you guys as a couple may have that's just a
whole other relationship topic i think when brandon got back
together he realized that you know i was a catch and it wasn't
worth going around and talking to these other girls
i feel like being confident kind of is important for a lot of different aspects
of your life great for relationships friendships for
work and also having all three of those and
like good solid group of friends a great job
a great significant other that treats you right also helps to develop your
confidence as well i just think that you have to
know what you're worth don't settle for anything less than that
and that is one big thing that has helped me
a lot with my confidence and also going outside of your comfort zone
when i was young i dated a lot of different guys and talking to someone
new is always kind of scary and you get your heart broken you get hurt but
at the end of the day when you have dated and seen like a good amount of
guys you're a lot more confident in the next
guy that you talk to and you know better how to handle
yourself you know your expectations and how to kind of let him know that
in high school i was super shy insecure but now with all the experiences that
i've had i'm not shy and also with my relationships i'm not
scared to let brandon know like what i expect out of him i also had a
couple girls ask me like how to not be jealous of their boyfriend um and say
like a hot co-worker that works with you and your boyfriend and i think that kind
of goes into whether you have trust issues with
your boyfriend if he's kind of like a seedier person and he's done stuff in
the past that has really hurt you and he's like talked
around with other girls i feel like that is
kind of a conversation that you need to have with
your significant other and that can't always be something that you hold
other girls accountable for you can't always hate
other women like for example i am so confident in my relationship with
me and brandon that i'm okay with him talking to like really attractive women
because i don't feel threatened by that like we go out and
order coffee or when we are at a restaurant and the server's kind of just
like chatting it up with us i don't feel threatened by that because
i know she's just doing her job and maybe she thinks he's cute but if she's
being respectful i don't feel threatened by that so if
brandon has like a really good looking girlfriend
and they are just friends i trust him and i don't feel threatened by that
but on the other hand if this girl is really disrespectful towards me
brennan had a girl that went to his high school that really was attracted to him
and i could tell that she just was really flirty with him
she would only have eyes for brandon and not really acknowledge
me and that's when i have a problem with it because if you're not going to be
respectful and acknowledge me while you're talking to my boyfriend
that's when i have an issue so in cases like that you either have to
talk to your boyfriend and let them know that you don't feel
comfortable when he kind of entertains a conversation or a
relationship with someone that doesn't really respect
you or your relationship and also if that person who is flirting with your
boyfriend doesn't really respect your relationship you might want to pull
them aside too and be like hey i don't like the way that you're talking to my
boyfriend and kind of just make it clear because it's better to have those
upfront conversations than just be like passive aggressive
be mad at like other girls that think your boyfriend's attractive and then be
mad at your boyfriend who doesn't really know maybe what's going on
in this case with brandon and that girl that he went to high school with she
would constantly be like flirting with him and trying to like touch him and
touch his arm and stuff like that i started noticing that she wouldn't
even acknowledge me so when i would be standing there with brandon and she's
chatting it up with him i would always like put my hand on his
cheek and kind of like look him in his eye and maybe like get him to kiss me or
like kind of flirt back with brandon while
she was like in the middle of whatever she was trying to do and
kind of just let it known like this is my man
back up however you want to deal with it if you're like confrontational or not
i just kind of like to send signals and let them know like this is my man
and if you're not going to respect me you're not allowed to have this
relationship with my boyfriend and brandon also understands why i feel
the way that i do and it's kind of like if one of my guy friends were to do that
to me he would feel the same way and so you just kind of have to respect
each other and not make it like a contest or anything like that just be
adults about it and kind of have the conversation up front so then
you don't have to be passive-aggressive towards anyone
and also i think it's really great to kind of just understand that people
are just doing their jobs like attractive servers that are
talking to your boyfriend might not be flirting they may just be doing their
job so so my hair is a mess but this is the end
of today's video i hope you enjoyed this chatty get ready with me if
you guys have any questions or other topics that you want to talk about let
me know down below in the comments and that is it thank you guys so much for
watching and i will see you in my next video
bye
you