Surprise! I don’t like school. So you know what I did? I peed on it!!
Alright… so yes… I did pee on my school. To understand why I did it,
and how I got in trouble for it, we need to go back!
Like. Way back!!!
Why is there a car in the classroom.
It all started in sixth grade. Final period before lunch.
We were just learning about like… I don’t know… Factors in math…?
I did not sign up for this
So during lunch at my school, once you're done eating, you have to go outside and play
in the big yard. But there’s another yard that you're not allowed to go to
because it’s not supervised during lunch. But you know that ya boi don’t play by those rules.
So before my class ended, I asked my friend at the time,
Matt, if him and two of our other friends wanted to hang out in the un-supervised yard.
Matt said yes. Now as soon as the lunch bell rang,
me and the boys ran to the cafeteria so we could eat our lunches as soon
as possible. We were going into mission impossible trying to sneak into the yard.
As soon as we finished eating, we booked it out to the other yard.
And when we got there… we did what normal kids do.
we filmed YouTube videos
We repeated this for days… weeks… maybe even months!!
Eventually… the teachers started catching on…
But… there was this one teacher named Mr. Karl. He was one of our gym teachers. The problem is
that his office was literally right inside the wall of the school that we were playing at.
So he was the one who caught on the most, and eventually busted us.
Now, me and the boys did this for a couple of months, but the whole peeing on the school thing
happened before any of THIS actually happened! So let me tell you how… and why… I peed ON my school.
So I was in the other yard by myself one lunch… because I don’t have any
friends *laughs*- anyway, I was just standing around. Then it hit me.
You know that feeling… when you gotta go… like REALLY BAD-
OK I’M SORRY!!! I had to go- OK? I just couldn’t
hold it in. At least it couldn’t get worse than that-
oh crap…
that right there… is true fear. BECAUSE ONCE YOU START- YA CAN’T
STOP!!! Plus, there is a fully grown man in a biking outfit walking towards me!!!
**In head**: COME ON!!!! COME ONNNN!!!!
What are you doing here Josh?!
I uh.. I’m… I really uh.. I needed to go to the uh… washroom-
WHY WOULD YOU GO ON THE SCHOOL WALL?!?
I uh… I really needed to go and-
That IS NO EXCUSE!!! How DARE you pee ON THE SCHOOL WALLS?!?!
You should be EXTREMELY ashamed of yourself!!
I know… but I uh… the door was lock-
Ok… you know what… just GO!!
I know but I-
JUST GO!!!
I’m goin-
G̷̨̢̢̧̨̢̡̡̢̡̧̢̛̛̹̯̻̹̯̬̣͎͕̪̘̝̳͍̟̙̻̦̖̺̺̪̻̣̺͕̹̳̘̻̖̮̪͇͙̹͎̞̳̠̺̺̠͚̼̦̹͍̙̺̠̫̘̥͖͖̙̲̥̞̻̦̮̪͖̹͇̙̺̯̗̦̬̙̲̞̙̬̹̹̳̣͖̝̗̜̤͆͒̽̈̎̉̍͛̏̾̎̋̊̈́͐͊͐̈́̊͒̈́͗̀͂̂̈́̆̃̔͑͋̀͐̒̀̓̔̅̒̀̓͑͛̏̀̓̾͆̄́̀͊͐͒̈͑̃͗͗̆̀̉̇̈́̈́͊̈́̉̆̍́́̓̉̍͑̔̍͆͐̃͛̿̆̐͐̈́͘͘̕̕̚̕̚̚̕͘͜͜͝͠͠͠͠ͅƠ̴̡̢̡̨̢̨̧̢̞̯̤̥̟̞̙͖̤͈͍̞̞͙͙̲͍͖̖͉͕̯͉͈̺̠̙̪͕͕̣̤̮̯̬̰͚̻̖͉̙͚͙͉͍̗̳̹͖̹͚͕̲̺̤̺̟̼̬͓͕̟̣͗̽̏̇͂͌̏͊̃̉̓̓̄̌̂̾̽͊̋̈́̐͛͒͑͂̂͊̀̂͋̄͂̏̓̎̀̀͌̆͂̾̅̈́̅͑̎͗̇̓̊͆̏͂̎̈́͛̒̈͌̊̐̒͊̐̉̍͘͘̕͝͝͝͝ͅƠ̶̧̨̨̢̡̭̥̲̞̺͎̜͇̗̮̭̳̤͓̺̟͓͈̖̭̱̠̩͎̪̖͚̹͕̜͎̖̯̯̗̲̠͈̣̳̝̣̼͈͕̫̲̪̺̬̙̪̹͕̤̠̌̓̉͆̐̀̈͛̉̓͐͐̂̔̈́͌̑̃́̑̂̈̊̎͒̀̄̈́̾͗̅̅̋̆̉͑̆̉̃̑̓̍̽͌̾̈́͗͒̒͌̓́̿͂̓̀̃͒͋͗͒̈́̿͑̍͗̑͋͘̚̚͘͘͘͘͠͝͝͝͝͝͝ͅͅƠ̷̢̢̢̮̟͕̲͈̥̖̭̘̤̘̰̣͕̺̟͙̻̳̜͕͍͉̱͙̥̩̝̪̺̠͍̮͙̣͎̣̜̝͈̠̙̩̖̳̖̤͎̥̦̪̤̖̖̞̓̉̌͑̓͂͂̈́̂̑̂͛͐͆̂̅̓̈́̄̀̀̈́̆͗̉̄̽̇̊͊̃̚͘͝͝ͅƠ̶͓̒͑̔̓̎̏̓̓̽͐́̽̉̕̚͝͝Ơ̵̧̡̛̦̮͉̳̙̬͓͍̦̰̣͉̯͉̘͚̪̗̝͓̩̲͍̳͈̥̩̈̿̊̅̔̒̀̀̒̑̈́̔͗̉̉͐͗̿̇̀̈́͌̋͊̓̊͊̋̎̾̉̃̾̈̍̄͋̾̐̀͋̈́̎̈́͆̇̑͋̽͂̂̈͐͂̇̌͆̓̇̈͛͂̌͑̇̈́̍͒͋̆̄͆̀̀̆̊́̿͑͘̚̕̚̕̕̕͜͝͝͠͝͝O̴̡̢̨̧̨̧̢̢̻̠̳̻͉͉͔̱̩̠̟̘͇̣͖͇͖̻̰̗̘͉͔͍̺̼̠͖̭̫͕̲͔͉̜̣͓̞̯͓̎̅̋̋͋͑̈͋͗̔͒̂̇́̃̂̋̎͛̈́͆̊͗̌͆͛̄̓̂̓̑͑͒̀̆̔́͐̃̉̈́̓̇̂̂̔̈́͐́̔̆͛͊̆͒̒̈͗̔͒̽̌̔͊̓̔͂̍͑̍̎͛̃͌̉̇̾̉̕̕͘̚̚̚̕͜͝͠͝ͅͅ!̴̨̰̗̣͇̤̪̟͕̖̙̹͇̙̰̳͕̱̙̯̣̗̺́͗̏̾͛̃̉̽͋̽̒̐̔̀͊͌̒̀͆̋̋̅̀̋̂͒̏̄̀̔͗̓̂̾̍͘̚̕͝͝!̴̡̧̢̨̧̢̢̨̢̨̢̢̨̢̢̛̛͕͚͍̺̖̹̻̦̫̯̙͎͈͈̩̰̪̫̪̰͙̗̲͙̬͖̪͙̱̫͈̫̙͎͎̱̺͖͈͙̙̬̤͎̟͚̫̥͔̻̼̝̯̦̦̪̣̠̯̳͎̳̖̼̞̪̤͎͇̙͕͍͓͓̯̖̊̒́͑̿̊̄̒̂̍̂͗̉̏̀̐̒̄̌̄̃̆̃͂͋͌̇́̑̅͒̏͋͛̃̋͊̆̋̈́͋̆̈́̀́͛͋̄̓̿̀̈̒͒̇̈͒̏͑̒͛̃̃̕̚͘͝͝͝͝͝͝͠͝͠ͅͅͅ!̶̡̡̡̨̢̨̡̡̡̢̧̛̛̛̛̰̟͙̻̼͈̩̤̗̘̮̯̼̹̣͇̦̳̞̭͚͇̹̠̺̥̱͇͍͖͈̪̠̮̗̯̳̥͕̟̳̘͖͔͉̫̻͓̠̹̭̹̩́̿̓̇̅͑͗͌͋͊́̓̀̉̊͌̃́̽́̀̃̔͌̔͂̏̈̀̿̇̍̓̉̽̓̂͑̑̾͂̓̓̾͊͛̄̑̔̄̋͂͛̎̓̓̀̊͆̔͗͒͂̀͒̂̈͋́̊̐͐͌̋̃̇̉̚͜͜͜͝͠͝͝͝͝͝ͅͅ!̸̨͇͇͙͔͉̙̼̰̑̐̈̉͒̓̒̿̎̒̋͝!̵̛̛̛̛̛̘̝͊́̔́̑͑͊̓̐͗̇̅̔̊̂͒̉̀͑̓̓͐̂͐͆́͒̐̍̋̈́̊͗̆͑͑̀̍͛̾͆͌͐̅̂͋́̈́̒̊̈̽̊͛̍̋̈́̽̽̓̄̈̈̽̈́̇̇̅̿̍̓͌̈́̏̄͌̐͂̅̈̆͗̑̅͆̑̂̔̚̕̚͘͝͝͝͠͠͝͝͠!̴̨̨̨̡̧̨̡̡͚̩̹̖̠̮͈͈͈̲̜̩͔͓̼͚͍͍̞͔̣̪̮̺̥̹̝̱̥͈͓̮̗͍̘̙̣̤̬̲̱͎̜͓͇͎̝͉̩̞̜̗̱̟͍͍̠̫̥̜̦͓͇̯͔̎͗̏͜͝ͅ!̸̢̨̧̨̨̢̛̛̛̛̥͖̣̘̟͇̩̦̣̱̹̞͉̞̙͓̗̱̳͙̦̞̯͍̮̼̟̣̭̣̟̮̝̼͒̌̈́̓͒̐̎͊̏̄̊̍́̀̑͛͐̄͒̔̍͋̈́͂̇̊̌̈͌̐̄̀͑̉̐̊̊̌̈́̀̊͛̽̍̿̅̔̏͊́̅̏̍̐́̐́́̈́̈́̉̿̾͒̃̄́̀͌͋̅͐̑̽͋̽̄͐̋́̾́͆͐̉́͘̕͘̚͘̚͘͝͝ͅ!̵̡̨̨̢̧̡̞̤̝̝͈̱̖̬͙̩̭̜̦̫̣̝̖͖̖̭̬̞̟̱͖̤̯͉͕̦̻̺͉̇͊̀̏̈́̿̂͆̋͊̇̎̏̃̔̓̍͗̌͂̏͗̒̾͒͑͐̔̈́̚̕̚͜͜͝ͅͅ
At that moment I realized that Mr. Karl meant trouble. He was onto us.
I really hoped that we would be able to avoid him but…
I wouldn’t be making this video if everything was fine and Mr. Karl didn’t bust us again-
Ayy!! That was a pretty sweet sho-
WHAT DID I TELL YOU KIDS ABOUT PLAYING. IN. THIS. YAAARRRDDDDD!!!!!!
No no no no no no!! It’s uh not what you uh… think… we were just leaving-
Yeah dude… we were just leaving. Take a chill pill- S A V E M E
I’VE HAD ENOUGH OF YOUR NOT LISTENING!!! YOUR COMING WITH ME!! PRINCIPAL TIME!!!!!!!!!
Can I… uh… can I help you?
Is the principal busy…!
Yes actually… she and the Vice Principal are very bus-
Your right Mr. Vice Principal… we need to beat the children when they misbehave
and should cut all teacher salaries by 80%-
WHERE ARE THE TURTLES!!!!
*awkward laughter* excuse me sir… what is the meaning of this nonsense?
These kids have been playing in the south yard-unsupervised-
for a couple of months now!! I’ve been letting them off the hook and giving
them chances! They’ve had their chance, and they keep abusing it!! PUNISH THEM!!
Well… we will have to do something about them going in the yard… but I think-
Also Josh peed on the school bricks.
wat
YOU DID WHAT??
I uh-
To be honest, the principal didn’t really care that I peed on the school.
She kinda just said whatever and told Mr. Karl to leave the office.
She then told us to not go in the yard, or else we will actually start getting in trouble.
She was pretty chill about it… and guess what. We never went back into the othe yard ever again!
And that’s how I got away with peeing on my school kids. Eventually me and the boys started leaving
the school campus and walking down a street where there’s a bunch of stores to eat lunch.
The moral of the story? T H I N G S C A N A L W A Y S G E T W O R S E ! ! ! ! ! !
Wow! That was a real good BigMac-
OOF