I’m Samantha Bee and thank God! - Derek Chauvin, the former Minneapolis police
officer found guilty on all three counts in the murder of George Floyd.
- You had people cheering. You had people crying in these streets as well.
- I would not call today’s verdict “justice,” however, because justice implies true restoration.
But it is accountability, which is the first step towards justice.
While yesterday’s guilty verdicts are a step towards justice, they don’t change
the fact that a man was murdered, and Black people are still being killed by police. We
have a long way to go to make this a country that, I don’t know, actually treats everybody
like human f***ing beings. And there are many steps we need to take to get there. One of
them is legalizing marijuana. Did we have a marijuana act already planned for the day
after 4/20? Yes, we did. Were my writers too emotional, too high, or too emotionally high
to write seven new minutes of content? Yes, they were. Did we have to cut a tasteful joke
about today being Tony Danza’s birthday? We did, and we stand by it. Everyone from
Chuck Schumer to Charles Koch and Snoop Dogg support federally legalizing marijuana, but
it’s clear doing so won’t be easy. For one thing, Biden still opposes full legalization,
preferring to leave it to the states. And recently, his administration fired staffers
for revealing they’d used marijuana in the past. Oh my God, dude, why are you firing
people for being honest? Even more importantly, why are you firing all the people who might
have weed on them? You’re going to be left with a staff full of hall monitors. Dude!
But it’s not surprising. Nearly a century of anti-marijuana rhetoric has left many people
still scared of the drug. But marijuana isn’t just for spliff kings anymore. A 2019 survey
found that two-thirds of Americans say marijuana should be legal. So for every three people,
there are two puffs and one pass. If you don’t get that joke, you’re a narc. I also didn’t
get it, so it’s fine. This evolution in public opinion has been a long time coming,
thanks to increased recognition of medicinal benefits, increased employment opportunities,
and economic benefits for states that legalize recreational use. While the conversation about
federal legalization is ongoing, states have taken matters into their own hands.
- Voters in New Jersey, Arizona, and South Dakota chose to legalize marijuana for adult
recreational use. South Dakota and Mississippi voted to legalize medical marijuana use.
- Two years ago, New York state decriminalized cannabis, but people could still technically
be fined for smoking or carrying pot. With the stroke of Governor Cuomo’s pen, that
all changed. As of today, New Yorkers can now legally possess three ounces of pot.
Mhm. Which I’m sure Cuomo will up to 300 pounds if he needs to deflect another harassment
accusation. Legalization almost always wins when it’s on the ballot, and since 2012,
more and more states have adopted some sort of reform. That might include decriminalization,
which eliminates jail or prison time for possession under a certain amount, but there’s still
a possibility of penalties and fines. There’s medical legalization, which allows doctors
to recommend marijuana for serious conditions like seizures, PTSD, and nausea experienced
by cancer patients—and less serious ones like being a class one medical dweeb. Finally,
full legalization removes all penalties for using or possessing marijuana, and in most
cases, allows for legal sales and home-growing. That means I can start getting the word out
about my own special homegrown blend: Sam Bee’s Panic Grass. Leafly called it “mostly
lavender.”