Hello, my name is Colin Hanks
and I feel excited about being Conan O'Brien's friend.
Well, wait a minute.
Is someone got a gun to your head? What is that?
I'm asking myself out loud.
You know what you're doing?
You're trying it on to see if it works.
And turns out these pants fit.
(all laughing)
You look fantastic in those, I like Conan pants.
I got a lot of room where I need it.
(all laughing) It's good.
(all laughing)
You and I, and I'm not special because of this
but you and I have always gotten along very well.
Yeah.
The first time I met you, I said to myself
I like the cut of this man's jib.
Ooh.
A phrase you don't hear all the time.
No.
But then I realized, oh you probably just get that a lot.
You're a very lovely guy. You're talented fellow.
I appreciate that.
So I'm not in some special club
for liking me some Colin Hanks.
No, but I will say that you were always very kind
to me because when we actually first met
I was just a super fan of your show
and had gone to tapings and, I mean,
I remember seeing you at the old late night show
when you came out to LA I remember-
Oh, you came to one of those when we traveled the show.
When you traveled to LA, I remember meeting you then.
And you were incredibly kind and gracious
and nice when you really, truly did not have to be.
I didn't wanna be either. I know, I know.
It was everything I could do.
'Cause that's my gig. That's not yours.
(all laughing)
And then when I was in college
I really sort of took it as like,
I felt like I had made it because I had been on your program
before Andy left for the first time, I dunno he left.
He's left seven times. He's left seven times.
Yeah. He always says, "I'm out."
And we always have a giant salute to him
and then he comes back.
But it was such like a point of pride.
Like I really did feel like, oh wow.
I'm officially like part of this, you know, thing,
show business, whatever you wanna call it.
Oh, that's cool.
And so I think it's always just been a little bit
of a mutual admiration society.
Yeah.
We get along really fine. I'll say that real, real fine.
It's a really weird way to say that.
I don't think so.
I think when I'm talking to Colin,
I slip into a certain vernacular that he, and I understand.
He's saying a cut of his jib and it's fine like a knife.
It's all yeah.
We get along really, really fine.
Yeah. It's just weird.
Are you sure you guys aren't just close
and he's not just a translator for you?
I think that's probably it.
Could be. Could be.
I remember and we were bringing this up
I was walking along the beach one day
as I do, it sounds like the beginning of a song.
Yeah.
I was walking along the beach one day
and I saw you and I was so excited
because you had just been in the show Fargo.
Yes. And I've loved it.
I was wary because I thought
this is one of my favorite movies.
How is this gonna be a TV show?
Yeah.
And so I went on for about 15 minutes
about how thrilled I was that you were in Fargo,
how great you were.
I loved your character, and I was looking forward to more.
And you broke the news to me on the beach that no,
it all changes up after every year.
And I swear to God, I was devastated.
Oh.
Because I really got,
I don't know if other people have had this with Fargo.
I'm sure they have.
I've really liked different seasons
but I really liked that season and thought, oh great.
I'm on this journey.
And I'm gonna see Colin
and these other terrific actors go forward.
And then they reshuffled the deck.
And I was frankly enraged.
Well, that was a brilliant lesson
in show business is that I had waited
I think seven years to like, try and find like
a program that was like as good as my hopes were.
Yeah.
And in that time, they created shows
that only exist for one season.
I know. (all laughing)
But you know, there was that era of show business
which you and I know Colin,
I'm sure much older than you,
but we both remember that era of show business
where you get a on a show and it clicks
and everyone likes it.
You're all set for seven years.
Yeah.
And then just at some point in the not too long ago,
they changed it up.
So it's like, did you like that?
I really liked it. Good.
It's gone because the streaming model.
And you're like, "Wait a minute, wait a minute.
What are you talking about?
Can't we have more of those?"
And yet the argument can easily be made
that that's what makes those seasons so good
because there's a a definite beginning, middle, and an end.
Right.
That's how I like my storytelling.
That's not how I like my jobs
(all laughing)
but that's how I like my storytelling.
No, I like my jobs. It goes and goes and goes.
You're all middle man. I'm all middle.
I don't like a beginning.
I just, like, my career pretty much has been,
I got started in 1985.
Went right to the middle and have stayed there.
And just found different parts of the middle to go to.
Yeah.
And people keep suggesting, "You could probably move on now
you're over 80 to the later part.
Like to the part where the bears find Goldilocks."
And I'm like, "No, no, no.
I like the part where I'm still trying out the beds."
Well that, I mean, I think that's actually really
one of the cool things about like your journey
for lack of a better phrase, is that you've always
seemed to be the one that goes towards the area
that tickles you the most.
Yes.
That keeps you as engaged as possible.
I am very selfish. (laughs)
I just like to be to be happy.
Well, but to be honest
like that actually makes everything else,
it makes all the other components
of show business worthwhile.
Do you know, If you're not, trust me.
If you're not digging it
it is a drag to, you know, for everybody else.
And that is, I think one of the reasons
why I think it's so fantastic
that you've like created this space.
'Cause I thought like, oh man, I'm coming
and I'm gonna see Conan and it's gonna be Gourley
and like four other people and that's it.
And it's gonna I don't know what the space is gonna be like.
This is a happenin'.
I mean, you created a fun house here.
Yeah.
The model was Hugh Hefner's Chicago home, his townhouse.
Which explains your outfit-
In 1965. (all laughing)
It explains your outfit.
I am wearing a beautiful robe right now.
Wig. (all laughing)
People tell me that it was it's not the right era anymore.
And I don't see any evy evidence of that.
No in the style and your misogyny.
It's all still there.
No, we found this space, which we talk about
from time to time, but we found this space in Larchmont
which is this really nice, cool happening area of LA
and we built our little, I wanted a PeeWee's playhouse.
I wanted a bat cave.
Yeah totally. I wanted a place where.
I think of this more as your little
like subterranean silence of the lambs well, you know?
Well you just took this to a dark place.
Well, it's a dark room. There are.
And you have been outside of this room, right?
He won't let me out. No oh.
And also to be fair.
That's explains why I haven't seen you in so long.
To be fair to Gourley.
There are fingernails embedded in the wall.
Yeah, mine. (all laughing)
You keep putting lotion on. Nobody knows why.
I'm waiting for the basket to come down.
I never asked you to put on lotion.
That was your idea.
Just give me a basket.
This is a version of Silence Of The Lambs
where Gourley at the bottom of the well
and he keeps asking for more lotion
and the serial killer's like, "What? Wait, wait, what?"
I put the lotion in the basket.
You've never looked better in a Kimono though.
I think it's very important to say.
You should see me out of it.
You're in the Kimono.
Oh you will. He's dressed up in a robe.