I always try to find simple ways to understand the person that I am.
Sometimes I wish I can break myself into pieces, so I can understand each piece and
what it represents, almost like playing with Legos. If I had to build a bicycle,
let's say, with Legos, and I had the pieces spread on the floor,
to start, I'll probably pick a simple piece, maybe a wheel or a steering handle,
just because they're easy to find, easy to understand and put together.
But I'll probably have a challenge when I reach the gears, because they're more
complicated, they're not so easy to understand or to put together.
And I might have the tendency to push them aside and play with other tiny pieces,
but I know for a fact, if I don't take the time to bring these gears back,
understand them, and put them into the bicycle, that bicycle will not start
moving. Now, let's imagine we had to build a person, and we had all the pieces spread
on the floor. To me, the pieces would represent our stories. Some stories are
like wheels, they're easy to understand and easy to share. And others,
they're just like gears, they're more complicated, we don't understand them,
and they're not easy to share. But just like that bicycle, if you remove an
important part out of a structure, the structure is not complete.
You know, it took us month to organize, month and month, to organize Mindvalley
Reunion. You can imagine the amount of organization and details that can come
into an event like this. But the most difficult part for me was to actually
just come and speak to you guys for a simple three minutes.
You see, I always identified myself as a shy person. I've always been the girl
in school who would be quiet even if I had all the answers, or even if I'm in
a meeting and had an amazing idea, I will hear that voice that tells me,
"Maybe next time." And I didn't really had an issue with it until the day
I was really frustrated because I couldn't stand
up for myself in a situation. And that day, I remember, I went back home,
I grabbed a journal, and I wrote down, "Today, I'm starting my own healing
journey." I didn't even know what that meant because I didn't know what I was
healing from, but I just started writing random shit. Anyways,
so the more I wrote, I realize more stories were coming back to me,
stories that I'd forgotten about from childhood, the stories that are more
complicated, the stories that are not easy to understand or share.
But that's exactly what I'm going to do today, share a gear just because I know
this is a safe space, first of all, and also, I'm just hoping that I can open the
space or the platform for you guys to trust each other and to share as you go
through this journey this weekend. When I was a little girl, I used to have hiding
places in the house, a lot of them, actually. And those hiding places were not
for me to play hide and seek with my siblings, but because I grew up into a
situation where I had to deal with child molestation with a particular relative.
And I was little girl, so I didn't share it with anyone until one day.
I remember I was a teenager, and we had some construction work happening so the
noise woke me up. I walk into my mother's bedroom, and I was washing my hands in her
bathroom. And the next thing I know, I feel a presence behind me so I turn
around, and I realized it was one of the construction workers.
And before I can do anything, the guy reaches out and touches me
inappropriately. And for the very first time, I don't think and I act.
So I ran out and I ran fast. And my feet landed me in front of my mother so I told
her the entire story. So my mother rushes to the room to speak to this guy and ask
him, "What did you do?" And I was right behind her. And of course,
he told her something between the lines, like it was an accident and so on.
And I was standing there, I didn't bother to explain myself, because I knew one,
my mom would know better; and two, I was just thinking, "Oh, my God,
I finally spoke out for the first time in my life." And before I end that thought,
my mom turns to me and says, "Don't say anything and just go to your room." So she
actually didn't believe me. And honestly, I never thought that story ever affected
me until the day I was writing these final words in my journal,
and I realized those sentences my mom used, I use as my life mantras.
I use them in school, I use them in meetings, and I use them throughout my
life. And it was until that moment that I sat down and brought back that complicated
story and just shared it with myself, that I was able to come here,
stand in front of you guys, and share it. So what I would love to invite you guys to
do this weekend as you enter this journey is to bring all your Lego pieces and throw
them on the floor. You can pick a wheel or a seat, but with honest,
pure vulnerability, I say the most transformation comes when you pick
and share that gear. Thank you very much.
Thank you.