TOP OF THE MORNING TO YA LADDIES, my name is Jacksepticeye and welcome back to Shtuntfesht!
All the people fell out of the blender already...
They start IN the blender when I launch the game,
but then they bounce out because it takes me too long to get my recording all set up, apparently.
Even though it's only taken, like, thirty seconds...
Well, anyway!
We're- we're gonna get in and play some of the levels we haven't done last time.
Maybe some of the same ones again.
Um, but there's some time trials,
There's uh...
N- uh.. no I did the long jumps.
Time trials and stunt course and the Ragdoll Climber.
I didn't really want to do the Ragdoll Climber until now because I figured it was gonna be really hard because you have to...
um- who should we use?
Grandma!
Why not? Grandma's my favorite one.
I think I actually have to use like the ragdoll
to get up
Which -- I mean -- How?
H- Ohh I have infinite
jumpy-doos! Ohhhh!
Oh I shoulda done it ages ago, then! GO GRANNY! HIT 'EM WITH THE DAB! *laughs*
She the best!
The best granny!
Oh god, she broke her fuckin' neck.
Oh! Stay up there!
Why you vibratin'?
( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡° )
What's happening?
It's- it- HA HA
Yessss. Fuckin' checkpoint-arooney
K, I have to do this in four minutes to get a score
AHHH NO!
GRANNY!
Fuck's sake.
Oh no. No, no, NO, NO!
You old geriatric! *giggles*
Right then, okay. Let's try that again. I- Noooo!
Aaaaaaand... hy-JAHA!
Go! Yes!
Ahahahahahahahahahow! Mother fucker! What did I hit?
I think hit just like a-a-a big green 'pane in the glass'
HA!
There we go! Nice!
I was about to make excellent fucking time there a second ago until you did that to me. Hyuh!
We got it, Granny. We got it, Granny! Again, hit 'em with the dab.
There you go! Ahhahaha! Perfect timing!
Ohh shiteballs!
Hup! Hyahh! Don't fall off. This could prove to be very fuckin' difficult!
'Cause you don't know how far the-the one ragdoll is gonna go so you then have to do it agAIIIN in midair
Ohhh.....
Stay away from Mjölnir.
Oookay. Okay. EHHH! Yesss!
Okay, now where do I go?
♪ Where did ya come from, where did ya go? Where did ya come from Cotton-Eye Joe? ♪
*scatting*
Hup! Huh! Yessss! NooOO!
Okay. There we go.
I'm hearin' like *swish noises* Oh that's you- that's the fly swatters. I thought it was Granny. *giggles*
I thought she was so awesome that she was making like, fly swatter sounds.
NOHO!
WHERE YA GOIN'?
I DID NOT FUCKIN' AIM YOU THAT WAY!
*deep exhales*
Huh!
Yes!
Hahaoh shit *laughs* Yahay!
I just want -- at this rate, I just want to fuckin' finish it. I don't care about high scores or anything like that.
I ain't about that bullshit, all I want to do is finish it.
Me and my homie G, Granny
( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
Hahh!
Ah, that a girl, Granny! That a girl, Granny! There's some fuckin' gusto left in these bones!
FUCK YA ANYWAY!
It sucks that I can't even get a score until I finish it
HAHH!
There we go.
Right back to the FUCKIN' START anyway. *rage*
It seems like if you keep the momentum going you can actually do some crazy shit.
Ah god! Ah god, no! Come back here!
Can you actually get up onto this one?
You almost can!
Granny-- *laughs* She was sitting on it! *Pilsbury Doughboy* That was cute!
FUCK! OH GOD! NOHO!
IT'S SO ANNOYING!
That was AWESOME though!
K, let's try the stunt course then. I ain't about that bullshit!
Let's go with Stan. Stan's awesome. Stan's the man. Stan -- I fucking trust him.
Are you fuckin' serious with this shit?
How in the blue blazeses am I supposed to do this?
Oh gohod.
Oh god! How would you do it in anything BUT this fuckin' car?
The others don't have the power to get up these fuckin' things
I'm fuckin' doing it though! Ha ha ha! How?
Oh SHIHITE!
Fffffffffffuhck.
Okay let's do it again! WHOO!
I wonder could I do it actually just with Stan
Would I -- Would I be able to, like, jump him out of the car and then I'd be fine?
Heh! Go, go, go.
It only takes 27 seconds to get a a-a three thumbs up which means the course isn't that long which is good news for me
You know what's not good news for me?
Stan being a BITCH!
HOHH! I pulled it back right at the end! I don't know how I did that, but that was cool!
Right, okay. I might have to try with Granny or, uh, the other Sw- fuckin' what? Swede?
Was that what he was? I can't remember.
Aaaand *grunt*
Oh shite. Ahhhhhhh! Noooohohoho
Stan, you can suck the inside of my nostril.
Granny, I dunno if you're gonna be able to do this.
I mean I have -- I've -- I'd love to believe in you
but, I mean, you're already fuckin' strugglin'.
You know what? This thing's got some fuckin' power behind it!
Could -- ah fuhuhuck *laughs*
How? Why? Why would you make levels specifically just for individual, like, vehicles? I mean, I'm sure you probably CAN do it with this.
But it-it-it seems like it's clearly made for the other ones!
I can't even keep control of that pile of shite
Okay let's *sigh* let's go -- I don't know why I have to quit the entire thing, just let me pick a different character
Let me try the Swede.
He's 21 apparently.
You look way to fuckin' happy for this. Don't be so happy Swedey-boy.
Just like all my Hopes and Dreams. Falling. SHATTERING. And not living up to their expectations!
We're just gonna have to do it with Stan.
Stan's the only one!
He's the only one that can actually get past the start of it.
Hup!
Mainly 'cause he has A CAR
And the rest of you barely even have common sense!
Come on, come on, Stan
Man the first fuckin'
The first attempt I did at this has been the best one so far
Actually, this is pretty fuckin' good.
Oh, ohh, oh. Yehess!
Keep 'er goin' Stan!
Now don't roll! YAHASS! I almost got the fuckin' three thumbs up!
Wait, I didn't even get two?!
I got one, that's good enough.
Yesss, high five! High five me. Yes! I did it. *giggles*
See there in the -- there in the blender and then they get bounced out. Whee!
Go on, Granny. Granny, bounce out.
Come on! Somebody bounce out again.
Oh god, they get flung around so much
Whee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee-hee!
Oh that's awesome.
Okay, let's do...
Why is there Time Trial II and III? Where's Time Trial I?
I'm not crazy, right?
What the fuck?
Okay, let's just do this anyway
Stan again!
Oh my god.
What is this level?!
K this is actually just about driving.
Maybe -- maybe Granny or somebody would actually be better at this 'cause they can turn sharper but they might have a bit of trouble gettin' out over that. *laughs*
Ohhhhkay! Take it easy!
Not doin' too badly!
28 seconds to get a fuckin' three thumbs?
What?
Oh, the end's right there, that's why.
Oh, oh, oh! I almost did it!
OOPS!
Tokyo drift!
Ahh, that's not a drift! FUCK IT!
I was makin' great time!
I was actually doin awesome and now I -- ah fuck -- suck balls! ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
Oh, oh, OH!
LOOK AWAY!
Did it look awesome though? I think so.
Where the fuck even is -- there- ah Stan's fine! Few crunched bones, but he'll be alright. *laughs*
Okay, let's try it with somebody else then.
Stan I-I love ya buddy (not really) but you suck.
And Stan's thing is the only thing that's easy to control. Or easiER to control.
Still a big dog's bollocks, but
Granny you sh-- you turn too sharply and then you're very eager to spin around!
Oh god, how are you gonna get out over this?
You're fuckin' not, that's why. Then-- Oh god, Granny!
You okay? She's fuckin' fine.
Goddammit.
Stan, you're up again. Let's do it. Everybody else can go suck on hairy balls.
You-you got this, bro. You got this, I believe in you. I believe in Stan.
Staaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaan can do it!
It's not as -- it's not as perfect as I would like to come out of that turn, but you know what? We're gonna have to deal with it.
That's the best we got at the moment people!
At this rate, again, I just wanna fuckin' finish it I don't really care about anything else
Oh, oh, oh, oh, OH, OH, OH!
NOOO! COME ON! YES!
*He didn't expect this*
I don't know how I did it, but I did it!
That is not -- that is not good *laughs*
Oh I can't go into photo mode? Aw, come on.
One thumb. It's all you need. 'Cause the other thumb has to be on the controller.
Right. There's another time trial level: Time Trial III.
So I wanna try this one.
I'm just gonna use Stan 'cause fuck everybody else.
I'm seeing lots of spikes everywhere. That does not instill confidence in me.
And this one is 44 seconds for the three thumbs which is also pretty fuckin' bad.
Is this -- did this game just become TrackMania all of a sudden?
Fuckin' nuts ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
Oh, graceful landing! My god, I'd swear you were made out of feathers!
AHH!
Oh Jesus fuckin' Christ, what is happening right now?
Easy does it. Nihice! Soft like fuckin' kittens!
SON OF A BI-
As soon as I show any sort of joy towards ya, you come up and dick me in the booter.
I don't want that!
I said no!
What even are physics right now?
It's okay, it's okay we still got this
Oh yes! Fluffy ducks.
I keep forgetting that there's a-a lit -- a dip there
It's okay we got this. We got this! Ohhh
Yes!
Okay, fast over the top
Speed was nOOT with us last time!
NOOO CONTROL IT!
AHHH FUCK! NOOOOOOOOOOO!
Whoever said "third time's the charm"
only said that because they were trying to make themselves feel better for coming in third
because they didn't get first. It was like "Ah. Third-third time's the charm. Hahaha!"
And everyone else was like "Oh, Jeremiah, you're so witty! You're so positive and optimistic!"
when really he was DYING INSIDE 'cause he didn't get the gold medal!
That's how I feel right now.
Buttcheeks! Nice.
Oh we're on the wrong side of this.
Oh YES!
YES! YES, YES!
Okay I need to fuckin' back it on up now.
I'm not gonna get the fuckin' thing. 'Failed'? I'll show you failed, you big geranium!
See I told you I'd show you failed. *whines*
Why am I even trying?
I dunno why I decided to pick you 'cause I have no idea how you're gonna be able to do this.
Fuck's sahahahake
I feel like this is analogous to your life: an absolute shambles *laughs*
Last attempt!
If I don't pass it this time, I don't pass it at all and I don't give two fucks!
There's a certain point where my self-esteem gets hit and I don't want that
I got it, I got it, I got it. Confidence is key! If you feel like you can do it, you can do it!
Except for open heart surgery because if you feel like you can do that you better be qualified and you better be a doctor otherwise you're just gonna kill someone.
Oh yes.
Oh yes!
OH YES!
Ohoho that coulda been bad! *laughs*
NOOOOHOHOHOHOHOHOHO!
*the sounds of defeat*
I'm done.
K, well, that does it for this episode of Stuntfest!
I knew I left those last levels there for a reason. I knew I left them for ano -- a-a different video on their own for a reason because good
sweet mother of
baby apples that was -- that was
that was literally like tying twine around my nipples and having it twisted to the point of breakage.
Mother of Jesus.
Anyway
Thank you guys so much for watching this episode if you LIKED it PUNCH that like button in the face LIKE A BOSS
And high fives all around ~
✋✋✋✋
Well, thank you guys and I will see all you dudes IN THE NEXT VIDEO!
Oh whoopty fuck. So glad I was able to get into the LAUNDRY room.
Ooh cool, look. Washing machines.
Do you want those peewees?
That does NOT look like Italian. I've SEEN Italian.
I have laughed too much.
Oh it hurts.