Relationships, after rocket science, may be the hardest thing to figure out. Since every relationship is different, it can be hard to fully understand the entire relationship.
With that knowledge, it can also be said that when your partner is keeping you at arm's length but never giving you that intimate embrace, you may feel discouraged.
You start to feel confused and a little frustrated because you don't know what is holding them back from making that full jump.
You may also be here because you just started a new relationship and you are not getting that serious vibe from them.
You need to make sure that you aren't overthinking things and they are acting a little sketchy. Emotionally unavailable partners can be extremely hard to decipher.
They will act one way today and another way tomorrow.
Obviously you really care about this person or you would not be here right now. So let's dig in.
Number 1: They won't leave any of their stuff at your place.
Leaving some of your belongings behind every time you come over can be a usual, subtle sign of commitment.
Leaving your belongings is kind of like marking your territory. You are planning on coming back and claiming your property. Now this is usually okay to do if your partner is on the same page.
If you attempt to leave some clothing or shampoo and your partner stops you to give it back, it may strike a nerve.
Now, your first thought would be that they are seeing someone else, but that may not always be the case.
Leaving items behind in their place is a big comittment for someone who you would consider emotionally unavailable.
This act may seem small and not a big deal to you, but your partner is going to see it as a huge commitment that they are not ready for.
Now, they are not going to outright say that they don't want to see your stuff because it will make them uncomfortable, but instead may find another excuse as to why you can't leave anything there.
This gesture can go both ways, as they may never leave anything at your place.
Number 2: They rarely talk about the future.
You may find emotionally unavailable men and women have a difficult time discussing the future.
You can see they will clearly avoid it or quickly change the subject. This may include any type of commitment-related discussion.
If you can get your partner to discuss their future, they may avoid mentioning you or the relationship. They do not want to try and say anything that may give their partner false hope.
If you start to mention a future together and your partner seems on edge, it is important to look at their body language to try to fully understand what your partner is saying to you about their thoughts on the relationship.
Discussing the future for them can mean they are locked into something they might not be ready for. So to avoid saying the wrong thing, they avoid the discussion all together.
They may also say something along the lines of, "I just worry about the present. I don't have time to worry about tomorrow.” This can seem frustrating for the partner that is confident and sure of what they want.
Number 3: They only see you on their terms.
Dating an emotionally unavailable person, you wouldn’t exactly say of the relationship, "We spend so much time together! We’re attached at the hip!" Having an emotionally unavailable partner is difficult because they only agree to dates and quality time together when it best suits them.
This can be extremely frustrating for the other person because they lack any control over the relationship.
If you find yourself making plans or at least attempting to and they keep slightly adjusting it so it best suits them , you may have an emotionally unavailable partner.
This is a control tactic used so they don't feel like they are the ones submissive in the relationship.
Their lack of ability to commit to their partner is expressed in so many ways and controlling time together is one of the top signs of emotional unavailability.
Something else you may notice about your partner that is concerning is they will simply skip dates and not say anything or say they forgot and made plans with other people.
Partners who experience this kind of behavior may not even realize that their partner is emotionally unavailable and may just believe that is how a relationship should normally be.
Number 4: They do not show any raw emotions.
In a normal relationship, if something is deeply hurting a partner, it's normal for the other partner to get upset too and attempt to understand and comfort.
A partner who can be considered an emotionally unavailable partner will not show any empathetic emotion or really any emotion that can put them in a vulnerable area.
Sometimes you will see that partner joking around a lot especially in serious times. They will attempt to make light of the situation when joking may not be the best option.
Some of these partners feel that if they show the same raw emotion their partner is showing them, it will bring the relationship to a whole new emotional level.
If their partner is expressing concerns about the relationship, they may brush it off and tell them they are overthinking or it sounds like a personal issue. Sometimes they may even call you and your feelings "intense.
" It may be almost impossible to pull any true emotion out of your partner simply because you want it.
Some partners may think, "showing emotions is weak." Now, you may not believe that but they certainly do.
You may also see your partner eventually start to express emotions, but you can tell they are not true or genuine. You can tell these emotions are just fabricated to please you or avoid any confrontation.
Another sign to look out for is that your partner shames you for having emotions.
A partner who is truly there for you, as in emotionally available, would not shame you for these feelings, but rather help you get past them.
By the way, make sure to subscribe if you have learned something new today.
Number 5: They have a difficult time admitting faults.
So, we will admit that we are all human and we make mistakes.
Now, also as humans, it can be hard to admit these mistakes when they are made. Sometimes we have to swallow our pride and admit we messed up.
Someone who is emotionally unavailable can't admit that they messed up. They will also not admit long-term problems such as hurting their partner emotionally.
Admitting their faults to their partner is an emotionally mature thing to do and most emotionally unavailable partners lack that characteristic.
Sometimes the emotionally available partner will wait and wait for their partner to admit their wrong doings or just brush it off and move on.
Allowing the behavior to continue is a mistake many people make in relationships. Instead of confronting their partner and trying to open that line of communication, they are afraid of the truth and just brush things off.
Number 6: They have never been in a long-term relationship.
Let's say you are dating someone who is 27 or older and you come to find out they have never been in a relationship that lasted more than six months.
It is not that they don't want to date, but their relationships just seem to fall apart more often than not. That could be considered a red flag for an emotionally unavailable partner.
Usually when a relationship starts going on for quite a while, the seriousness will continue to grow too, but if both partners are not on the same page emotionally that can put a dent in things.
It may be a good idea to go to your partner and discuss what caused their previous relationships to fail so that won't happen in the current one.
Most emotionally unavailable people won't admit their faults and just blame the other party.
Number 7: Their relationship with their family is almost non-existent.
You may find that your partner keeps their family at arm’s length as well.
Talking to your partner's family, you may find them describing your partner as emotionally distant or as the black sheep of the family.
This can be found in a lot of people who are disconnected from their own emotions. Parents may describe them as a loner and even emotionally selfish.
They may even be surprised their child took someone home to meet them.
These comments may be surprising to you and even actually open your eyes to your own relationships with them.
We are not stating that every strained relationship with family leads to emotionally unavailable partners, but quite a bit of people who suffer from emotional detachment have strained relationships with their family.
Number 8: They are never satisfied with you.
This one is short and to the point. Your partner is never satisfied with anything you try to do for them.
You may try to do nice stuff for them, take them out on the town, or introduce them to new foods and hobbies.
They don't appreciate any of the things people do for them.
Now they may seem physically satisfied, but emotionally, they may be miserable. This can cause a lot of problems in a relationship.
The partner trying will start to feel like they are the only one doing so and that they are not good enough.
They will begin to blame themselves instead of looking at the other half of the equation.
Partners will sometimes not even see the bigger picture and continue just trying to please them in order to see if they can change their partner emotionally. That is easier said than done.
And if you liked this video then check out these related videos to see more.
And make sure to like this video to let the algorithm know you'd like to see more videos like these.