This is my father and his brother, Sam
In the family of 11 children, they were the closest together
Well, right now, what I'm thinking about is where I had my first Seders
It was different than it is now, the kids weren't up for the whole Seder
The youngest would ask the four questions
And they would pour out the wine for Elijah
and then we would go to bed
And when we woke up in the morning, the glass was empty
and I was sure Elijah came
The first Seder and we've gathered here tonight
The first Seder and it falls on the first night
We have gathered here this evening to share Pesach and our feelings
and we'll sing and drink and do it up just right
My husband loves Passover more than any holiday in the year
We used to have it in the dining room
I had two tables set up
It started getting larger and larger when we put the big room out in the house
My husband decided well, gee, he can invite his cousins
Charly, Lois, Evelyn, Claudia
Zak, Ernie, Dorothy-- glad we thought of ya
If we don't begin we'll never serve the soup
Oh, that's great!
My brother, David, had an entourage, so the Seder got bigger
He was like the Pied Piper
The all-time high was 120
That was our all-time high, I think we'll never reach there again
We wanted to continue the tradition
of my family having gefilte fish at Passover
Doreen liked my mother's recipe
but we didn't know it
My memory is that we needed my mother's housekeeper there
because she would taste it
and she would know if we were doing the right thing
if we had the right ingredients in
Dex, do you know what's in gefilte fish?
No, and I don't wanna know
It's fish, it's many fishes, right?
- It's a lot of fish - It's a school
It's a school of fish
The gefilte fish
I try not to think about what's in the gefilte fish
I think it's just best that way
I just don't know if I had interest in eating it
- Just like-- of like - Yeah, the idea of--
Fish meatballs
Yeah, that like of grosses me out
- Yeah - I mean I've heard it's delicious, but
it's just a peculiar mixture of meatballs and fish
I cannot go in the house when they're making the gefilte fish
I cannot be there
The smell of that gefilte fish during my pregnancy
it scarred me
I love Passover, it is my favorite holiday
and it has never been because of the food
For me, the fish was just something we got through
- I love it now - You love it now?
- Now I've really come around to it - I can't do it
Jason would go Matzoh balls soup and wait for dessert
- Matzoh balls soup to dessert? - To dessert
- Yeah - That was my move
I am the biggest fan of that fish, it's the greatest
I'm not a sweet fish liker
I like salty fish
I like my mom's fish
I'm a connoisseur
I can tell you the good years and the bad--
I mean, it's like wine in our house
It's tradition from my grandmother's hands
to my mom and my aunt's hands
to our hands
We make the fish
Every morning, every evening, may we have fun
We've been doing this since 1969
forty-eight years
That's more than half of my age
My house was overcome with the smell of gefilte fish
Just the smell
It's like, you know, [prust]
That's innocence and childhood, joy, and family
all wrapped up in the smell of fish
It's looking good
They're very light and they're falling apart a bit
- Here, look - Look how beautiful it is
Aren't those gorgeous?
I have to be honest
I'm more concerned about the fish this year
I'm very worried that it's not going to come out of the jars
because it was so soft and so floppy
It's all about the fish for my mom
The taste is fine, it just may not be a ball
It'll be a part of a ball and another part of a ball
We'll serve pieces
We'll serve it with pieces, I'll put enough on a plate to be--
I think it's gonna come out
This is one, oh my goodness, it came out okay
Looks quite good
That looks great
Here's a piece of tasting
- How is it? - You have to taste it first
It's good
Suddenly, we've gone through the whole service
and the plates of fish are coming out
And my mom's waiting with bated breath, usually looking at my brother
Like, and she's thinking to herself, "It's a good year"
or she's already started to make excuses for the fish
and waiting to see what he thinks of the fish
Good balance
Very good mouthfeel
Right grind
A little light on the salt, a little--
But overall a solid effort this year
We're very happy with the fish
It's such like an old Jewish woman thing that we have to have it every year
Even if none of us eat it in 20 years, it's still going to be a part of the meal
I think, with a single carrot on every piece
My grandfather's Haggadah was full of matzoh crumbs and drops of red wine
so I really tried every year
to put as many drops of red wine and matzoh crumbs
in my Haggadah as I possibly could
Dinner would be right about there
I mean this is a petri dish, but it is still tradition
There was one part of the Seder where my grandfather would just cry
When I was a little kid, we would make fun of that
because we thought, "How funny, here's the part where Papa's gonna cry"
His eyes would well up and the tears would just stream
It would be those parts of the Seder where he was reflecting back on his family
that were lost in the holocaust and he had celebrated Passover with
My dad would say, "You have to come home for Passover
because it might be Papa's last one"
And he said that pretty much every year
98th Seder!
Passover is the holiday
that made our family a family
The point of the meal and the point of getting together
was much bigger than us, and we knew it
Half the people at the table can't figure out the math
of who belongs to who or how we're even related
But it does all go back to Papa Irving
and there's been a commitment to keeping this family together
My husband said to me
"Our kids are not going to be Jewish because of the holocaust
they're going to be Jewish because of the joys of Judaism"
We made it so much fun that people wanted to be there
Are you going to do this when you grow up?
- Yup - Absolutely
We wouldn't miss it
The messiness of it all, we wouldn't miss it
We want to be here
"My final word to you, my friend, shall be
Thank God for life
and when the gift's withdrawn
Thank God for twilight bell and coming dawn"
We say, bring on the fish
It's all that a human could wish
And seldom or less
is there [inaudible], I confess
such a splendid and odorous fish!
Cha cha!
This is the definition of the inmates running the asylum
That's what's happening here
For three thousand years, the Jews have made do without that song
and you guys decided to add it to the Seder
We've never seen that fish, never seen that song before, never!
We've never seen it before, we've never sung it!
You are right, Mom, we have never sung that song
and it wasn't by accident
Okay, page 82
Tradition, tradition, da ra ta!