hi guys its Antonio and I'm in LA for VidCon this week and today I'm here with
Helena Hart who many of you probably know has a great and growing YouTube channel
she's become a good friend of mine over the past few weeks and we even did a
livestream a few weeks ago but I loved her content and I asked her if we could
do some videos together so this is the very first one so I'm excited about that
yes thank you so much for coming to visit I'm really excited too.
so one of
my favorite videos on Helena's channel is the tips that she gives out
how to bring a man closer to you using your feminine energy so I thought it'd
be a great topic to introduce my audience to as well and so she agreed to
do that so thank you you're welcome thank you for coming to visit yes this
is one of my favorite things to talk about I'm really excited to share this
message with your community so we often talk about it and in my videos
situations where a woman will be dating a man for some time and you know things
are going well in the beginning he is totally into her is calling her texting
her good morning they communicate throughout the day he's
planning dates they're going on these amazing day to them at some point he
starts to get a little bit more distant and he's not doing the things that he
used to do he isn't showing her how much he cares about her he isn't putting more
effort into the relationship he's just kind of backing off a little bit or it's
like somehow like he doesn't care so I know that in your videos you talk about
how a woman can use her feminine energy to bring him closer so I love to hear
yeah it's such a common situation probably the number one situation that
when they come to me with and they find my videos on YouTube because maybe I
mean I came on strong for a little while he was pursuing her and acting really
interested but then after a few months in or this happens in long-term
relationships too he can start to back off or withdraw or maybe act a little
distant or pull away and of course I've been there myself we all have as women
right and so I know how painful it can be and what I really found working with
so many women over the years is our instincts to lean forward and try to get
that man back or reconnect relationship often just push him further
and further away so I love to give them in a whole new way of going about this
that really works and it also just feels better because it's in alignment with
our nature as women as the feminine energy partner so that makes so much
sense to me because when I think of something if I'm in a situation with
someone and I feel them slipping away or changing my first instinct I think
anyone's interested would be to reach out and try to fix that right we want to
fix the situation that we think it's broken or or might be breaking or only
the way you want to figure out how to resolve that and I and I think that
oftentimes we put more energy into the relationship we try harder because we
want you want that to turn back to the way it was so well what do you suggest
doing differently yes so the first tip I have to share on bringing a man closer
especially if he's pulling away or acting distant right now is shifting
your mindset I've really found that if you're looking for advice on how to
attract or Rhea tracked the man you want especially if things aren't going the
way you want them to in your relationship or potential relationship
you likely put this man on a pedestal in your mind in some way and we as women we
can do this without realizing it right and we kind of make the man the goal or
the prize in our minds it does make sense and when we do that we can't
really help it we tend to want to go after him or win his love or or prove to
him what a great catch we are or show him our value and when we do that we're
actually in our masculine energy there's this urge to like show him how great the
two of us would be together that's when we get extra nice and sweet and
understanding and right have you for favorite flavor sure for sure yeah we
have you've all been there so the first step is shifting your mindset taking
that man off the pedestal if we put in there and drop the whole idea of this
man as the goal or the prize in this situation so I know in a lot of my
videos when we talk about when a man pulls away you know I think that I
talked about doing some of the some things that are similar to that but can
you tell me more what does it mean when you say change your mindset that's such
a questioner so that you asked that yeah
you really want to start seeing yourself as the prize as the feminine energy
partner not in an egotistical way where you were better than the man it's just
in a really confident way where you know your value deep down you know a woman
who's truly confident and knows her worth that knows her value as a woman as
a potential relationship partner wouldn't put a man on a pedestal and
suddenly try to chase after him like that right if a man was acting distant
or pulling away a woman who was totally self-assured and knew her value would
likely anchor herself right where she is rather than leaning forward and you know
scrambling to try to get that man back yeah I totally agree with her and you
know I think that as a man if the woman has made huge like the goal like like
you're her prize like she's trying to win you over you can kind of feel that
and then all of a sudden it changes the whole dynamic because men for the most
part are the ones that are the hunters and chase women so if we look at it from
an evolutionary perspective you no matter the ones that are the pursuers
that's a traditional thing it's a cultural thing talking to my parents
about dating and how they dated or they dated with a chaperone in Italy but but
it was never be thought of a woman chasing the man was always the man tried
to win her affection and not only from her but she had to get the approval of
her parents and her family and everybody had to come together as a community
almost and said yeah we accept this guy you know how the different dynamic for
sure so I totally agree with that I love that shifting your mindset and
remembering that you're the prize for sure what's the second what's the second
tip the second thing I have to say on how to bring a man closer using your
feminine energy is stop trying to make something happen constantly with
this man or in your relationship so like I mentioned in the first secret if you
put a man on a pedestal what we tend to do as women is try to like go after him
or win him over by doing a bunch of things and that puts you in your
masculine energy so what does that look like in real life that looks like always
being the one to initiate contact with the man making it really easy for him
always being the one to drive to him and plan everything and schedule the dates
and pay for everything all the time anything that looks like leaning forward
you know for everyone watching when you're physically or mentally or
emotionally leaning forward you're in your masculine energy when you're
leaning back you're in your feminine energy so that's a kind of a physical
demonstration of how this energy exchange works next time you're with a
man and everyone can try this try physically leaning back in your chair or
you're sitting with him so if you are leaning back into your feminine energy
and he's a masculine energy man and he's interested in you and truly the right
man for you he will instinctively feel compelled to come towards you right so
in those situations where a man's acting a little distant or pulling away I
totally understand the tendency don't blow up his phone and over text him and
call him up and ask him what's going on and if you're coming from a place of
anxiety or insecurity when you're doing that I always recommend that women just
stop doing all of those things just for right now just to kind of shift the
energy dynamic a little bit so the third tip what's the third tip the third tip
on how to bring a man closer using your feminine energy is take your focus off
of him and put it on yourself and your own life where it belongs something I
always say I talk about that a lot in so many of my videos it's really important
because a lot of women's think they're leaning back into their feminine energy
but they're actually not they're actually leaning forward very much
mentally by constantly thinking about this man even if he's not right in front
of her or contacting her or obsessing about him or analyzing what
may have gone wrong and all of that energy it's mental energy when it's
still energy can often keep a man at arm's length I'd love to hear your
thoughts on this but and the man can you kind of just sense when a woman has been
obsessing about you or strategizing trying to do things to get your
attention back no man want a woman who is independent a woman who has her own
wife who has a full life and if a man feels like she's giving up everything
just to have an opportunity to be hang out with him then it feels like she
doesn't have very much value she doesn't have very much going on and it just it
loses the attractiveness just goes down tremendously women feel worried about
looking like they're being selfish or they're not being thoughtful and the
problem is that you've been too thoughtful too selfless and so it's time
to focus more on you and when you do that your level of Attraction just Rises
automatically most of the time if a person who loves you of the person is
interested in you or wants to keep you once you do that you're gonna wake him
up and things are gonna change like you won't believe that's so true yeah woman
who truly knows her value deep down is not gonna just wait around and accept
crumbs from a man right and a man I can feel it if a man gets the sense that you
know you're just gonna wait around forever for him and he can take all the
time he wants and you'll just be there waiting whenever he decides he wants to
come back there's nothing to compel him to come back towards you or to keep
coming closer to you right right right absolutely it's so important so yeah if
a man is not right in front of you right now or he's not calling or texting you
or trying to set up plans with you I always say what is right in front of you
right there the whole world right in front of you so you want to reconnect
with your own life and do something to take your focus off of this man right
now often that's when you hear from him I just heard that over and over probably
every week I get an email from a client or a comment on one of my youtube videos
where someone says the second I forgot about this man that's when he
called right that's when he text me and it kind of feels like magic but it's
really not it's just the way it works it's an energetic thing when a man feels
like ooh where is she right here entails that focus being
pulled off of him and again it's not a game and it's not some sort of strategy
or manipulation tactic it's totally authentic okay so I just want to make
sure that I got this correctly so the third step is to take the focus off of
him and put it more on to yourself so in terms of feminine versus masculine
energy type of perspective what does that look like so that could be anything
and it's really different for every woman but I always say make a list of
you know 10 to 20 things that would totally absorb your time and energy and
attention anything where time can go by and you don't even realize it it could
be something really simple that you could do at a moment's notice like
editing photos on your phone or calling up a friend and going outside for a hike
or going to a yoga class sometimes physical things can really help get that
energy out it could be something creative like working on a painting or
an art project or something around your house like cleaning out a drawer or
organizing your closet something that just feels good to you when you do it
that's gonna take your mind off of this man right now and put that focus on
yourself and your own life where it belongs what that does is it creates the
space energetically for that man to come back towards you if he's the right man
for you taking your focus off of a man and putting it on yourself also looks
like connecting to your own heart and your own emotions one of the most
feminine energy things you could possibly do right this also includes
connecting to your heart and your own feelings and emotions one of the most
feminine energy things you can do right because a lot of times we do all of
these things that push men away because we're trying to cover up feelings for
example if you know a man's been pulling away a little bit or not contacting us
as much we might start to feel anxious or insecure and so rather than feeling
those unpleasant feelings we lean forward and
try to make something happen with action to solve those feelings for us right
feeling those things is fantastic you just don't want to act out of those
feelings because really you're stuffing them down and trying to not feel them
right right and I think that that too many times when people are feeling you
know pain of you know perhaps feeling like they're getting rejected or they're
gonna lose someone it causes them to do some you know pretty drastic things that
have counterproductive affective it just doesn't work out for them so it's okay
you know when you're feeling those things and we've all felt it and that's
okay it's it's okay to embrace that because you know that it's that's not
how you should that's not how you're supposed to be feeling and so
recognizing that is it's also a good way of reminding you that you deserve more I
think absolutely yeah a lot of times when we're actually connected to our own
desires or a great relationship with a man who is putting in as much effort as
we are well the first thing that happens is our perception clears up right and we
can really see this man in this situation for what it really is that's
one of the first things that happens when a woman starts leaning back and
connecting to her feminine energy her intuition kicks in right and she can
really feel and Intuit you know is this the right situation for me or does
something about this not feel good and do I need to take a step back and
reevaluate so as I'm listening to Elena talk about
these things I know how well these these things will work for people like so tell
us like have you had people that you know decided to give you know give these
ideas a shot what happens that's such a great question yet I'm so glad you asked
I hear from women every day literally I see it in the comment section
some of my videos on my youtube channel I have an amazing community of really
intelligent women over there and they give me feedback every day that this
really works and it works pretty quickly too and not only that it just feels
better because it doesn't go against their nature as a woman it works with
the way their brains are wired and the way a man's brain is wired so this can
just really start to flow a lot more easily and effortlessly and you know the
thing that I can't help you know my head keeps going back to you this is all
about loving yourself it's all about putting your not not in a selfish way
not in our sophistic way but in a way that you know if you didn't have such a
big heart it probably wouldn't be in the situation to begin with but because you
have been so giving so leaning forward to try to fix something or to try to
develop the relationship the way that it was in the beginning or the way that you
think it should be you're giving so much of this and so it's just a matter of you
know stepping back a little bit and focusing more on yourself it's I think a
beautiful thing I love these ideas and that's why I wanted to do this video and
talk about these particular topics I know it's something that that works and
it works for the right reasons yes thank you so check out her channel Hellena
Hart that link will be in the description and you know check out her
video she really has a great community of people like I you get so many
comments and so many people are so you cause that's something that does
anything is really important when you have this community of people that you
know start to share in the comments and start talking and supporting each other
it's a beautiful thing I love that about your job yeah I learned just as much
from the amazing women in my community is they learned for me because they gave
me feedback on what works and what they're struggling with and it really
helps me I really get ideas for my new videos from you guys right from everyone
watching and letting me know how all this works for them so yes I'd love to
have everyone check out my channel if you enjoyed this video and thank you so
much this was really you're welcome now we're gonna go hop on
her channel and do one I've seen the next video