Welcome back to my Dark Corner of this Sick World.
‘Oh, he’s a wise ass poppa’
Following the success of Steven Spielberg’s Jaws, there was a glut of fish based horrors.
'What have you got a shark attack?'
‘Now nobody said anything about sharks.’
Most of which grossly misunderstood what had made the film work.
Barracuda, initially, fits into this category,
Fish are attacking people.
‘Get me out of here’
A local chemical plant is polluting the water.
‘I’m a little bit concerned with the earth pal, can you think that big’
Are the two things connected?
Sounds like a question for marine biologist Mike Canfield.
‘I don’t have all the answers, ok’
Mike is arrested for his environmental activism by the nicest sheriff on the planet.
‘Got my daughter bringing something over for you shortly’
Which doesn’t stop Mike from acting like a dick.
‘And she’s got a great personality and makes her own clothes’
and he’s not the only one.
‘You simple moron!’
The town seems to be infected with a bad case of the jerks.
‘I’m so tired and edgy and I’m fighting with everyone’
All except sheriff Ben, who lets his prisoner go to the doctor with his daughter as escort.
‘I think he likes you because of your spirit’
I take it we’re using spirit as a euphemism for jackass,
although Mike is a lot more polite about daughter Liza, now he knows she’s hot.
‘If your father fins out he’ll shoot me’
Actually, knowing gentle Ben, I think he’s more likely to check you’re using protection then clear out for the night to give you kids some space.
‘Aren’t you gonna do anything?’
Meanwhile, back in the water.
The killings continue.
And it’s not just people.
‘There must a thousand dead fish out there, all twisted up and half eaten.’
Well…
'Still say there is no front page news here Ben.'
Turns out the barracuda in this town are jerks as well.
‘Is it possible you can change the behaviour of fish with what you dump in the water’
Clearly something is going on because men in black are nodding at each other.
Never a good sign and they don’t want attention drawn by nosy reporters.
Brilliant, cos everyone reads stories about pollution.
But a story about reporters being murdered over pollution, that won’t draw attention at all.
And how would people read it, I’m sure these were the only reporters in the world.
Yes, you’ve certainly stopped a media furore here.
‘I don’t know what the hell’s going on around here’
As Mike runs tests on fish he discovers something shocking.
‘The doctor is controlling the behaviour of people in this town’
I honestly didn’t see that coming.
‘There’s gotta be a reason right’
One would think
‘Why would anyone want to do this?’
It’s like this movie is reading my mind.
‘Well what has this to do with the fish?’
That’s just what I was wondering – I was watching a low budget Jaws rip-off and suddenly it’s the Manchurian candidate .
‘They said my work was good for the country’
And I saw no reason to question that logic.
‘My God, you’re mad’
Glad someone else noticed.
‘But who are they?’
I can really only think of one answer he’s likely to give.
‘The government’
Of course, but, forgive me, I’ve not followed why the government wants everyone to be jerks.
‘They said my work could prove useful if war..’
Yes, in times of national crisis what any government wants isn’t unity,
it’s a population intent on sniping at each other.
‘We can’t have peace protesters’
Ignoring the bonkers paranoia of it all, it doesn’t work on its own terms
because the chemical doesn’t make people controllable,
it makes them volatile, they may be fighting but they’re fighting for themselves.
So if you give it to peace campaigners they’ll just fight for their cause harder.
‘it doesn’t make sense’
I do wonder if the writers and directors, believed that the film’s abject failure was because it was too close to the truth and THEY stepped in.
‘What the hell are you talking about?’
Think about it.
'Fire!'
Thanks for watching for new bad movie reviews
Every Tuesday subscribe here. Something that makes this film even worse is the long
Slow scenes of scuba diving has there ever been a film that's managed to make underwater action
Genuinely thrilling. Let us know in the comments below
'You stupid broad'