LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, AS I'M SURE YOU KNOW, THE INDIANA
PRIMARY WAS TODAY, AND THE WINNER WAS,
OF COURSE, DONALD TRUMP.
BUT THE BIG NEWS WAS THAT TED CRUZ ENDED HIS PRESIDENTIAL
CAMPAIGN.
(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE) I REALLY DIDN'T EXPECT, LIKE,
CHEERS.
I THOUGHT IT WOULD BE LIKE, AHHH!
I DIDN'T KNOW THAT!
YES!
I CAN'T BELIEVE CRUZ IS QUITTING THE RACE.
I MEAN, WHO QUITS JUST BECAUSE THEY'VE LOST?
(LAUGHTER) WHY TODAY?
HE'D BEEN LOSING FOR MONTHS!
(LAUGHTER) CRUZ SAID HE'S LOOKING FORWARD
TO BEING ABLE TO SPEND MORE TIME WITH HIS FAMILY.
IN RESPONSE, HIS FAMILY SAID, "ARE YOU SURE YOU WANT TO QUIT?"
(LAUGHTER) JUST ONE MORE PRIMARY --
(APPLAUSE) BUT, I MEAN,
TED CRUZ SUSPENDING HIS CAMPAIGN IS GREAT NEWS FOR THE ONLY OTHER
CANDIDATE, JOHN KASICH, WHO IS NOW JUST WAITING FOR DONALD
TRUMP TO DROP OUT.
(LAUGHTER) AND THEN IF THE DEMOCRATIC PARTY
DISBANDS, IT'S GOING TO BE A CAKEWALK.
(LAUGHTER) IT REALLY IS.
IT WAS A GRACEFUL EXIT FOR TED.
FOR HIS WIFE, NOT SO MUCH.
HIS CAMPAIGN ENDED THE WAY IT BEGAN -- CLUMSILY AND HOSTILE
TOWARDS WOMEN.
>> TED CRUZ ANNOUNCING HE'S ENDING HIS QUEST FOR THE
PRESIDENCY RIGHT NOW.
TAKE A LOOK AT.
THIS HE'S EMBRACING HIS WIFE.
TAKE A LOOK AT THIS, HE'S EMBRACING HIS WIFE, HIS
FATHER -- >> James: I LOVE IT.
(LAUGHTER) CLEARLY, THAT WAS AN ACCIDENT.
I MEAN, MARRYING TED CRUZ.
ONE THING'S FOR CERTAIN, THE WOMEN IN CRUZ'S CAMPAIGN
HAVE HAD A STRING OF BAD LUCK.
CHECK OUT WHAT HAPPENED AT THIS RALLY WHERE CARLY FIORINA
INTRODUCED THE CRUZ FAMILY DURING MORE PROMISING TIMES
YESTERDAY.
KEEP A CLOSE EYE ON CARLY.
>> YOUR NEXT FIRST FAMILY.
HEIDI CRUZ, CAROLYN, CATHERINE AND THE NEXT PRESIDENT OF THE
UNITED STATES TED CRUZ!
(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE) (AUDIENCE REACTS)
>> James: TO SUM IT UP, TED CRUZ
DROPPED OUT OF THE RACE, WHILE CARLY FIORINA JUST DEVELOPED.
-- CARLY FIORINA JUST DROPPED.
(LAUGHTER) IN FAIRNESS TO FIORINA, YOU TRY
SAYING THAT TED CRUZ WILL BE OUR NEXT PRESIDENT WITHOUT GETTING
WOOZY AND FALLING DOWN.
ON THE BRIGHT SIDE, THIS MIGHT BE THE ONLY TIME WHEN FALLING
DOWN IS ACTUALLY WAY LESS EMBARRASSING THAN STANDING NEXT
TO SOMEONE.
DONALD TRUMP ACTUALLY RESPONDED TO THIS VIDEO, MOSTLY BECAUSE
NOBODY ASKED HIM TO.
HERE'S HIS REACTION AT A TRUMP RALLY --
>> SHE FELL OFF THE STAGE THE OTHER DAY.
DID ANYBODY SEE THAT?
AND CRUZ DIDN'T DO ANYTHING!
(LAUGHTER) EVEN I WOULD HAVE HELPED HER,
OKAY?
(LAUGHTER) >> James: YOU CAN'T SAY THAT'S
A PLUS POINT -- EVEN I WOULD HELP CARLY FIORINA, AND I'M
DESPICABLE!
EARLIER IN HIS CAMPAIGN, TRUMP WAS CALLING CARLY FIORINA UGLY.
NOW HE'S SAYING HE MIGHT PICK HER UP IF SHE FALLS DOWN.
GUYS, THAT'S GROWTH.
HE'S GETTING MORE PRESIDENTIAL EVERY DAY.
BUT DONALD TRUMP HASN'T TOTALLY DONE A 180, BECAUSE JUST BEFORE
CRUZ EXITED THE RACE, TRUMP GOT ONE LAST CRAZY ACCUSATION IN.
I KNOW YOU HEAR THAT EVERY DAY, BUT THIS TIME IT WAS REALLY
CRAZY BECAUSE IN AN INTERVIEW TODAY,
DONALD TRUMP IMPLIED THAT TED CRUZ'S DAD MAY HAVE BEEN
INVOLVED IN THE KENNEDY ASSASSINATION.
RIGHT?
(AUDIENCE REACTS) THIS IS VERY UNLIKE TRUMP.
USUALLY, HE THOROUGHLY INVESTIGATES A STORY BEFORE
REPEATING IT TO MILLIONS OF PEOPLE.
HERE'S THE PHOTOGRAPHIC EVIDENCE PUBLISHED BY THE "NATIONAL
ENQUIRER."
THIS IS A PICTURE OF LEE HARVEY OSWALD, AND TRUMP IS SAYING THE
MAN IN THE WHITE SHIRT ON THE RIGHT IS CRUZ'S DAD.
THAT PICTURE IS SO GRAINY, THERE'S NO WAY TO TELL IF IT'S
ACTUALLY HIM.
DO WE HAVE A MORE RECENT PICTURE OF TED CRUZ'S DAD TO COMPARE?
BINGO!
WOW!
I GUESS THAT SETTLES IT.
NOW, DONALD, I HAVE NO IDEA IF THAT'S TED CRUZ'S FATHER IN THAT
PICTURE.
BUT EVEN IF IT IS, I WILL SAY, WE'VE ALL TAKEN A PICTURE WITH
PEOPLE WHO DO REALLY BAD THINGS AFTER THAT PICTURE WAS TAKEN,
AND YOU SHOULDN'T BE BLAMED FOR TAKING THAT PICTURE.
ISN'T THAT RIGHT, DONALD?
(LAUGHTER) I DON'T KNOW WHO'S REGRETTING
THAT PICTURE MORE.