- So, here at Ladylike we talk about boobs a lot.
- But, there's one aspect of boobs that we haven't
talked about before.
- [Both] Breastfeeding!
- It's Ladylike, and were trying breastfeeding in public.
(gasping)
(upbeat piano music)
What do you think about breastfeeding in general?
- So, it will be a long time before I'm even
in the position to choose whether
or not I want to breastfeed
but, I do think it is something I want to give a shot.
You know, they're here, they're present.
Lets see what they can do.
- You at home might be watching this video
and thinking to yourselves, why are you two doing this?
- Because, I think that breastfeeding is still so taboo
within our culture.
I think people don't like seeing women's
bodies as being both maternal and sexual.
It just all depends on what people are comfortable with
and what they want to see you as versus your ability
to perhaps be both.
- I agree, I think there is a lot when it comes
to the female body that people just want to stay visual.
They just wanna see your boobs, they just wanna see
your looks, blah-blah-blah.
They don't want to have to interact with it.
I don't think we should be isolating these
breast feeders into a closet.
Additionally, I'm treating this almost as a litmus test.
We've had this conversation in the general public
for a long time.
So, maybe we go out and we just get approving smiles.
- That would be great.
- Which would be nice 'cause I think if we did this video
seven years ago, it would have been a stir.
Tomorrow, we're gonna get our baby, were gonna
get a stroller, we're gonna create our fake diaper bag,
and then I want us to go around the Buzzfeed office
just to kind of practice, to warm up.
Then, were gonna jump into the deep end.
Here are the rules of this social experiment for us.
So, were gonna go to a restaurant, a store,
kind of a quiet area, and then outside public.
- All right. - Yeah.
- I'll put us all in our mommy car and we'll go.
- Okay, are you ready? - Yes.
- And, break.
(laughing)
- So, were gonna grab a couple ladies at work who have
breast fed before so they can give us some pointers
so we can really sell it.
- Hello. - Hi.
- Thanks for coming and talking to me.
- Hey, thank you for coming.
- Oh, of course, I'm so excited.
- So, tell me about your babies.
- I have one son whom I breast fed for about four months.
- You have twin daughters, did you breast feed them?
- I did, I breast fed both of them for a little over
two years and for the most part, I know.
- Two years? - I know, mama was tired.
- You were pressured into breast feeding?
- I think that it was just everybody was going to look
at me like, well why aren't you at least trying?
If I didn't.
- Yeah, everyone just needs to chill.
- So, before you started breast feeding,
do you kind of remember how you felt about it?
- So, I had heard a lot of moms talk
about how challenging it was.
I just assumed I was gonna fail because it just seemed
impossible to me and it ended up being very natural
for me, which is not everyone's experience.
- For me, I remember that I had to have specialists
come in and help me.
I wasn't producing a lot of milk either.
- It just feels like it's all on you, right?
- Yeah, it feels like there's something wrong with you.
I started pumping blood because I was getting my nipples
so raw from doing it.
I finally, after four months, got the point where
I was like, look, it's okay.
You have to feed him formula, it's okay.
- He's still gonna eat.
- Did you ever breastfeed them in public?
- On occasion I did, it was a lot because of with the two
of them it was just a lot easier for me to do it at home.
- Pumping and breastfeeding is very isolating
and like there's no area where you feel like safe doing it.
Especially, on a college campus.
I mean, come on.
I had this one teacher in college who I will
forever be grateful for.
I was just like pumping in between classes
and she had seen me in there two times
and she was like I feel for you, have my office,
come in here whenever you want and you can talk to me.
And I felt like, that was just a moment of like oh my god,
someone understands me.
- Most of the time, when I did in public, I would be
in what I felt was kind of like a nice, safe space.
A lounge and in a women's restroom
and lot of the times women would give me the thumbs up.
- I think I wasn't given the opportunity to do it in public
because I thought that it was wrong,
but now that I'm a little more educated,
I think that now I would be like I don't need to move.
Like what's the issue?
Do you have an issue?
- So now you wouldn't have put up with it.
- No, (beeping) no.
- (beeping) no.
- I felt like you kind of should cover up.
Once you realize you're talking about your baby's survival
and you're talking about something that is natural.
When I see moms now, I give them the thumbs up.
- But the times that he did latch on
and I did get it, it was a bonding experience.
So in those times when I felt isolated
I was like oh, I'm bonding with my baby
in a different way.
- You gotta be tough.
- Yeah , then we'll get our our middle fingers all blazing.
- Yeah. - We're ready.
(laughing)
- On that note, Chantel and I are going to try it.
Wish us luck.
- Yes!
- Okay so today's the day that Chantel and I are going
to go out and actually try breast feeding in public.
Before we go, we have to choose our baby dolls
we have to grab all the baby supplies and then we have
to practice to make sure that it looks legit.
Do I look kinda like
you know, like a little momma?
- [Chantel] Yeah, maybe more stressed?
- Okay, um how's that, does that look good?
- [Chantel] (laughing) yeah.
- So like really, good?
Okay good!
I gotta go, I'll see you soon.
We'll chat we'll be in text.
- [Chantel] Yeah, yeah, yeah.
- Yeah okay I'll see you.
All right great.
All right bye.
Because neither Chanty nor I have ever breast fed before.
- I wore a front clasping bra.
That way I can just
- I'll just --
(laughing)
- If anyone like looks under and sees that,
they're gonna be like this woman is out of her mind.
- [Chantel] Yeah.
- Can we do something like,
like I've seen this happen before, especially when
it's like hot out or if it's just sunny.
This might be better because it's like
if I'm walking down like this
just like, it's sunny out, it's hot.
- [Devin] Also we can put the other baby down here.
There we go.
- Wait I have questions.
It looks like Chucky.
- Hey that's my child.
That is Stefano okay. - He needs a bit of a haircut,
I would love to trim.
- This is his first haircut. - Oh my god, Stefano
your first haircut! - Are you gonna
save the hair? - He's looking so much better.
- Yeah, already way better. - Wow.
- Look at my little man-baby! - Much better,
thank you auntie Fred - Bye bye!
And we're on our way. - Maybe we can sell it
to our coworkers and see if they buy it?
Can you judge my body language to see if
- In pulling the baby out? - Motherly, matronly.
It is actually.
(laughing)
(indistinct chattering and laughing)
- Okay there we go.
- So Devin and I are obviously just doing this
just as a social experiment.
Neither one of us has a baby.
Neither one of us is lactating.
So we're just gonna be using a plastic baby doll.
What are some moves that we can do to sell the fact
that we're breast feeding?
- Don't forget to burp the baby.
- Okay.
- Once in a while, the baby has to come up for air.
- That a lot of it is just peeking to make sure
that like the baby is on the boob.
- Okay.
- So when you're holding it, you just do a little peeky.
- Okay.
- Get most settled.
- You look so maternal.
- Thank you.
- I mean we don't need to be 100% accurate.
We just need to convince passer-byres on the street.
(plucky music)
- It does occur to me that we're by an actual front door.
I'm gonna try to practice how to do like an unlatching
so maybe I'll kind of turn.
Look at this little guy's little feeding hairs!
- Aw!
All right let's go fool some suckers.
- All right time to button my shirt back up.
- Baby, there we go.
- She's strapped in, right?
- No.
- Okay, well there goes that.
So Devin and I decided to go to Glendale so we could test
out a bunch of different things all at once.
- Typically it's always busy.
There's always something going on.
Even if it is in the middle of the workday.
- Yes. - Am I right?
- Just good to get out of the house.
- So first, we went to lunch and we chose to sit
outside, that way we could potentially get looks
from people passing by as well as from fellow diners.
- I decided to push the stroller first into the restaurant
because I'm a fake mom who takes charge.
Okay?
- So we're enjoying our lunch.
It was delicious.
- I had ceviche.
Can you even have ceviche if you're breast feeding?
So I pulled out the baby and this was around the time
that we were paying for the cheques
so we had a lot of interaction with our waiter.
Unbuttoning your shirt and taking out your breast
and adjusting even a fake baby is a thing.
What really helps me sell it is just slight
tension in the jaw.
I'm a little stressed.
(squeaks)
- There was a man that was kind of diagonal across the way
from her also eating.
He started looking at her just kind of doing like
- Not like a menacing stare but kind of like a
(intense orchestral music)
like circling back with his gaze a lot
which just like, dude, yeah I'm breastfeeding.
Duh, get over it.
- But then there was this little family
who had a little toddler boy that started running around
and then the mom was like shh, the baby's sleeping.
and we were like oh, he's not sleeping,
she's just nursing.
And they bought it!
That was a huge win 'cause we were like
okay, this is off to a good start, we know
that something is happening correctly here.
Shall we go onto our next adventure?
- Yeah, you ready?
- [Chantel] After lunch, we started walking around
and then it was my turn.
And so I chose to try fake breastfeeding in a big
department store because I know that in that particular
store there's a lounge within the women's restroom
that is usually used for breastfeeding.
So we found a bench that was right by the escalator
and there was a man sitting on the other side of the bench.
So the second that we sat down I pulled the baby out
and started breastfeeding, he got up
and then immediately left.
- This can be interpreted in many ways.
You know, this could be them realizing oh, look at
the time, we gotta go.
Or it could be like something is happening
we don't agree with it.
I also noticed as Chantel was breastfeeding,
'cause this lounge area was right next to this escalator
that goes to the second floor.
Everyone on the escalator went just like eyes.
- The women that I saw pushing strollers
did not even blink, they didn't even care.
Even thought this was the absolute most
low maintenance way for us to try breastfeeding,
I still didn't realize breastfeeding takes little time.
- So we decided to swing outside and I sat myself down
in like a very congested area of this mall.
Kind of like an entrance way right in front
of a very popular store.
There were two gentlemen sitting right next to me
who did get up and leave at one point.
But like if I were in that situation,
if I were actually breastfeeding, and you were around me
and you didn't agree with it or like it,
don't say anything just get up and remove yourself
from the situation.
- She did the smiling nod to a fellow mom
walking by with a kid in a stroller.
- Of all the places that I could've breastfed, it was
I think the most respectful situation.
Everyone was kind of doing their own thing,
and that was great.
And then we went to a bookstore with a cafe
and I got a cappuccino.
- So once Devin had finished trying to breastfeed outside,
we made our way across the mall and into a bookstore
that has a very popular cafe.
And I was sitting at a table by myself
that was next to a girl probably in her 20s
who was reading and she didn't look up at me once.
- I think the cafe was the coziest place
for you to be breastfeeding.
- I think something that we experienced that would
not be the case with an actual baby is that Stefano
was silent because he doesn't cry, he doesn't whimper,
he doesn't make any sounds because he's a plastic baby doll.
- Things I learned about breastfeeding.
- I think that we live in a very liberal part
of the country.
Our experiences could be very different
from experiences in a different part of the country.
- Honestly, this was just a social experiment
to see how others would react to us
and if we felt different in a public space.
And I think it was because we were in a very family
friendly area, and honestly I really think a lot
of women have done a lot of work to fight for this cause,
to fight to end breastfeeding shame.
Kudos to the women and the female body people
who breastfeed because it ain't easy.
- I do think that I looked very maternal, though
'cause I feel that in myself.
I'm excited for that responsibility in five plus years.
- Since this is all pretend, I think the pretend milk
coming out of my (beeps) is just cappuccino.
Yeah literally cappuccino from one (beeps),
and champagne from the other.
(tongue clicking)
♪ Hi I could act more ♪
♪ That you can be my friend to be ♪
♪ Hi I could dance more that you'll draw me crazy ♪