Welcome back to my Dark Corner of this Sick world
‘I've never seen anything so horrible.'
In between making Dracula Prince of darkness and When Frankenstein Created Woman,
Hammer horror’s finest director Terence Fisher took time out to prove that nobody’s perfect
by directing Island of Terror
‘Not a very pretty sight’
with Peter Cushing along for the ride
‘Well that’s unbelievable’
A strange corpse has appeared on a remote Irish island
Hmm, must have been a Jedi.
‘As far as I can tell his body doesn’t have any bones’
Drs Stanley and West are called in from the mainland to help, and in the lab of a cancer specialist,
they find more bodies but no explanations.
Which is odd because a local bobbie in the same building manages, without even trying
to find a bunch of giant, mutant bone-sucking amoebas
which is the sort of thing that you would think even the most cursory of searches would turn up!
‘There’s some peculiar goings on going on on this island’
Fortunately the creatures, called silicates, aren’t perfect
'They don't seem to be moving very fast.'
Oh you’ve noticed have you? I wasn’t sure shot of creature
'Hurry' 'I'm Trying.'
In an hour or so it’ll be here!
‘I'm so frightened Mr Cambial'
The only time it gets up any speed is when it uses gravity
But they do have the advantage of numbers as they divide every 6 hours
Hmm, they seem to be full of noodles.
‘That’s odd’
Needless to say the creatures are impervious to our weapons
but they have a weakness!
‘One of the silicates… it’s dead’
‘That Great Dane of Phillips’ is nearby… half-eaten’
They’re allergic to dog! Quick; to Korea!
‘You certain?’
Obviously not, the dog was radioactive so they dose some cows
while Peter Cushing has an Evil dead moment
Groovy. In the meantime the villagers are safe in the village hall.
'Look out!'
Nobody thought to board up the windows?!
‘It’s easier said than done’
Now, obviously the effects don’t help.
nor does the fact the bone-sucking sounds like someone at the bottom of a smoothie
And I don’t want to absolve Fisher from blame altogether, but this is a bad script.
‘You know we were lucky this is an island.’
Yes, this story only works on an island
but that also means all they have to do is evacuate the small population and leave the silicates there to starve
‘Well if that’s true it’s beyond me’
which means that it is essential for the plot that this is a small isolated island on which no one owns a boat
‘Don’t forget that launch is our only contact with the mainland in case we need help’
Yes, there is one boat which goes to the mainland early in the film and for no earthly reason doesn’t come back!
‘Looks like we’ll be marooned on the island for a few days’
‘This means we won’t have any contact with the mainland’
and the way it’s shot makes this even harder swallow, here’s the view of the island from the mainland
At low tide you could probably walk
‘Interesting problem’
And then there’s the ending which highlights something that’s been bugging me throughout the whole film
because it requires at least 2 of the world’s foremost cancer experts
to agree that what we really need in the fight against disease,
is a giant indestructible splat that eats people’s bones!
‘Now this is very difficult to explain’
Damn near impossible I would think.
Who would win in a race between the Creeping Terror the Silicants or the Elf from Elves, let us know below.
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Science has its risks, but the risks aren't enough to hinder progress