and how am I going to have a right understanding
unless and until
I have a right thinking process?
I need to study the situation from all angles.
To become stronger,
you need some sort of a stress,
you need some sort of a challenge.
When this stress and challenge
is beyond the capacity of our tolerance, our bearings,
it is at that moment that we become weaker.
So the whole idea of Yoga and mental wellness is
to make our being, make our moral fabric
so strong
that we can resist all kinds of ups and downs in life.
Simply put, if I may conclude it in one sentence,
the cause behind mental illness
is the polarisation between the mind and the heart.
Heart says something, mind says something.
When this polarisation also extends between two members,
for example husband and wife, or boss and subordinates,
it is this polarisation that always creates friction and tension.
So what to do about all this?
A greater understanding is required between a couple,
between the boss and the subordinate,
and between my mind and my heart.
And how am I going to have a right understanding,
unless and until
I have a right thinking process?
I need to study the situation from all angles.
“Why did my boss get angry?”
“Why did my wife or my husband get angry with me?”
Instead of
retaliating, postpone your anger, postpone your reaction
as much as you can,
and reflect on it for a few minutes by pausing.
Best time is at bedtime. So all our reactions should be
postponed till the night when we are able to go to sleep
peacefully and reflect on it and see
where did we go wrong?
“How did I misunderstand the situation?”
And next day,
if you are wrong, be courageous enough to apologise.
Only then we are going to have harmony and it is the harmony
that prevents further escalation of
stress, anxiety and depression.
So I do strongly believe that it is this mismatch between
the feelings of the heart and thoughts of the mind.
That is one aspect.
Second thing I wanted to share with you is about suicide.
Suicide rates are increasing in every state rather.
Gujarat, I think it is quite high also.
Little quarrels here and there at the family level,
some financial problems, some love related problems,
somebody shouted at you,
you know, another family member, expectation is not going,
but again to put it simply, when your hope
is challenged and you feel, “Oh, no more.
Even my hopes are crashing right in front of me”,
that is when people take the ultimate step.
Hopelessness.
Now, when a person has already become hopeless,
it is already too late to reverse this thought process.
Similarly, once the escalation has happened and
there is a stress between two individuals,
or multiple individuals, it is also too late
to remedy the situation.
I have seen many cases who come to meditate,
“Sir I am very depressed. Can you help me?”
There are methods.
But if they do meditation on their own, alone,
during the meditation, instead of thinking
of that object of meditation,
they cannot regulate their mind.
Somehow their thought process
gravitates towards the problem they already have.
So it is too late actually. When you already have
this anxious mind, depressed mind, schizophrenic mind,
it is already too late.
Of course we should not be so discouraged that,
“What am I going to do next?”
We can solve it, but it takes a longer time, you see
and also, we have to find out whether this depression, is it
simply physical, or emotional,
or physiological? There are vast differences.
Suppose you enter home after a day’s work,
you are stressed, you are angry at something,
God knows why you are angry, or upset.
The moment you enter the house,
your temperament is different.
Your wife, your spouse, your children can recognise,
“Papa, or mummy – something is wrong with you.”
So in order to get out of this, such a state,
we do offer a special meditation, we call it
‘antah shudhi karan’. We call it how we clean our inside.
There is a very specific yogic method.
Our trainers can happily train you to do this.
Just sit for about ten to fifteen minutes.
Just before you interact with other family members,
as soon as you reach home,
just undergo this process for ten, or fifteen minutes
and see how fresh and lighter you become,
as if you have just got up from sleep,
despite of your stressful day.