[music playing]
[chatter]
BOB: Doing onions, Bets?
BETSY: Yeah.
BOB: Having fun?
No.
BOB: My name is Bob.
I'm 62 years old.
When we first moved in here 29 years ago, actually,
things were, basically, pretty much in order.
You know, you could walk around.
You could do things.
Things were pretty well picked up.
And then, having the four kids, things
just kept kind of building up.
It became more difficult to keep up with things.
So you just set something down and go about your merry way.
And then it's still sitting there when you bring
the next thing to st down.
BETSY: I'm Betsy, and Bob is my husband.
And in a very short while, we'll be married 30 years.
He would even kind of brag when he was living by himself,
before we got married, before we had children, how
he could just pick up and go, and be all organized,
and on time.
BOB: I could move at the drop of a hat.
Everything was neat, orderly.
I knew just what I had.
It all fit in the pickup truck, and away we'd go.
[chuckles]
BETSY: I guess you kind of adapt,
and you kind of get used to the clutter around the house.
And you walk around it or walk over it.
My name is Christina, and I am Bob Sr.'s daughter-in-law.
I guess he's in denial about how bad things are.
I don't think he realizes that people don't live like that,
and that he doesn't have to live like that,
that there is a different path, a different choice.
Some time ago, some bedbugs have gotten into our house.
With the clutter, they find a lot of places to hide.
And it's very hard to find all the places that they hide
and to get rid of them.
BOB: They may have started as long
ago as two or three years ago, but we
didn't realize what we had.
And then, it was very light.
And we weren't particularly bothered by them.
Just once, occasionally, you'd wake up itching or something.
We haven't been sleeping in the house for probably
six or seven weeks, roughly.
It was actually comfortable out there.
And some people go all over the country
and spend hundreds and thousands of dollars just to go camp out
and sleep in a tent.
The family enjoys that and enjoys going camping.
We couldn't sleep in the house.
Yeah.
This was, like, our only choice to sleep.
The place I really want to sleep is in my room.
ELIZABETH MOORE: Hi, Bob. - Hi there.
Come on in. - Thank you, Liz Moore.
- Welcome. - Nice to meet you
You too.
ELIZABETH MOORE: I'm Dr. Elizabeth Moore.
I'm a clinical psychologist specializing
in anxiety disorders and compulsive hoarding.
BOB: This is the stove room, part of the living room.
Oh, OK, all right.
So this is where family things happen?
Or what are you using this room for at the moment?
BOB: At the moment, it's, uh, sucking things into it
and collecting them.
(LAUGHING) Oh, OK.
Bob's mother lived through the Depression.
And as a result, he learned from her
that it's very important to save things and plan for the future.
That is actually a door there.
Oh, OK.
- A good, usable door. - Yeah.
Was this something you brought in with the intention
of using it in a project, and it just kind of--
BOB: Um, yes. ELIZABETH MOORE: --turned into--
BOB: Yes. ELIZABETH MOORE: --a table?
BOB: How did you know?
ELIZABETH MOORE: [laughs] Is that another door over here?
The downside is that Bob may be looking so far forward that he
actually compromises his family's well-being and quality
of life in the present.
CHRISTINA: If something would've happened with the kids,
I would've have felt awful.
Why didn't I do something?
Why didn't we bring them to our house?
I mean, you don't want to break up their home, their house.
You don't want to take the kids out of normal,
but is this-- it's not normal.
I want to sleep here again, because my mattress,
I get it all to myself and I have room to roll around.
It's easier to get asleep.
Yep, go ahead.
All right.
Thank you.
BETSY: I just never was a nagger,
so I would tell him how I feel.
But I guess I've just come to accept that that's how he is.
It's definitely something in the top of my prayers,
that someday that could change.
You know, am I not being aggressive enough to really
let him know how I feel?
Well, probably not.
[knock on door]
Hi, Bob.
Hi there.
I'm Geralin Thomas, and I'm a certified
professional organizer.
So, Bob, this looks like I'm entering into--
what room is this? - This is the living room.
GERALIN THOMAS: Having a family sleep in a tent in cold weather
due to pests infesting your home,
there's nothing normal about that.
We can't really go to bed here.
I already got bitten by a tick once,
but not a Lyme disease one.
CHRISTINA: It's not that the kids are sheltered.
They know that people don't live like that.
I just don't think they realize that they
don't have to live like that.
All right, good morning, everybody.
Good morning.
Bob and Betsy, are you ready?
Yes.
Big day in your life, right?
Is anybody nervous? - Yeah.
GERALIN THOMAS: Yeah. BETSY: Yeah.
We're here to be really gentle.
We're not here to-- BETSY: Oh, no.
GERALIN THOMAS: --we're here to help and be supportive.
And we know that this is really difficult. Who's ready?
All of us.
Let's go.
Great.
[vehicle reverse sound]
GERALIN THOMAS: My plan for today
is to get Bob up and moving and keep the momentum.
So once he's in action, to keep him in action.
That's good, if you could put that
with some of the other caulk that was in the other room.
How's Betsy doing? All right?
Yeah, she's doing well.
She's in the kitchen sorting through some things.
It was important for us to see Betsy's take on things.
And so, we asked her to give us a tour of the house
to look at some of the rooms and understand
how things got how they got.
It's very frustrating for me.
GERALIN THOMAS: Uh-huh.
Because I just--
I feel like he gets it to functional,
and then he doesn't care about the rest of it.
Why even bother trying to keep things clean or to keep--
try to keep up with everything that he brings in the house?
You feel that you're on the bottom of his priority list?
Yeah.
GERALIN THOMAS: Bob doesn't think he needs help.
But he is doing it because he knows Betsy's upset.
I really think we need to keep putting
his children's health and safety and his marriage
in front of him.
ELIZABETH MOORE: It's important for her
to be able to feel heard after all these years
and see if we can get Bob and Betsy to communicate
through this process and understand
each other's perspectives, so that they can move forward
as a more cohesive team.
GERALIN THOMAS: It's never just about the clutter and the stuff
we're hauling out of here.
It's about deeper issues, and some of them
much more meaningful.
--been waiting to get you.
So now, I want to head into the bathroom with you.
You mean the tool shed.
GERALIN THOMAS: So?
Well, I don't want tools, or wood,
or whatever else is in there, except for what
belongs in there, what belongs in a bathroom.
GERALIN THOMAS: If you had to estimate
how unhappy this room makes Betsy,
what would your number be, 1 to 10?
BOB: 9, at least.
GERALIN THOMAS: 9, at least, OK.
This is the part where I'm going to push a little harder
for the day, OK?
- OK. - All right.
So-- - We'll see how that goes.
GERALIN THOMAS: OK.
Let's get the guys in here to get the lumber started.
I'm going to get out of your way.
Is every single piece of this wood necessary?
It's all necessary.
It's all good.
Hand saws for down cellar.
GERALIN THOMAS: That's a lot of saws, Bob.
Do you need to hang onto all of those?
We'll see.
ELIZABETH MOORE: It looks like some of these
are pretty well recycled.
Are these what if decisions, or are these actual--
BOB: No, no, I still got two more windows to put in, yeah.
So is it worth the space that the wood is going to take up?
BOB: Oh, definitely.
ELIZABETH MOORE: Seems like you have a lot of wood.
Well, I'm getting rid of a lot, too.
Are you?
OK, but are you keeping a lot?
- Just what I need. - Just what you need?
Just what I know I'm going to use.
- Yeah? - Yep.
OK, all right.
I think tomorrow's going to be more difficult for Bob.
I don't believe that we'll be able to clean everything out
enough to be able to really address
the bedbug problem the way it needs to be addressed.
GERALIN THOMAS: It doesn't matter that it's sealed.
Mm-hmm.
GERALIN THOMAS: It's cardboard.
They can crawl in.
They lay eggs.
They will hatch.
We take these, bag them, double bag them,
and then put them away very securely somewhere.
ELIZABETH MOORE: Is there any item
in this room that could be worth putting your family
at risk, the bottom line?
No, it's not worth the risk, but still just kind of--
We needed to make a decision.
And the obvious decision is we want peace, safety, joy,
and health in the household.
CHRISTINA: The little boys were sitting
in the car literally watching stuff from their room start
to come out.
And I just don't think that they were quite prepared for it.
I'm like, Sam, what's most important to you?
And he goes, my cars, don't throw away my cars.
We'll do it with you.
Yeah.
We'll get the information about it to make sure that it's safe.
If there's any way we can make it safe, it sounds like--
CHRISTINA: OK.
I know.
CHRISTINA: OK.
I don't know that they were super prepared for what
they were going to see.
And that's one of the reasons why
we've been keeping them away.
Hey, just careful with the wood floors there.
- OK. - Those have been done up.
When you're telling them to be careful of the wooden floor--
Yeah.
--what does this tell you about
being careful of the wooden--
Well, the paper's OK.
It was the shovel scraping on the edge.
But this is OK?
Well--
We are right now racing against the clock.
We have less than half a day left.
ELIZABETH MOORE: I think that there's a lot
that still needs to be done.
There's a lot of places where the bedbugs can be hiding.
And I think it might be a bit disappointing for everyone
to hear what the exterminator might have to say for us.
GERALIN THOMAS: Bob?
BOB: Yep?
Time is up.
BOB: And I'm almost done here on this.
GERALIN THOMAS: The exterminator is here.
BOB: Yep.
And now, we will learn whether it's
been cluttered enough to, um, have treatment for the bedbugs.
Betsy, is it OK if we interrupt you for a minute?
Sure.
ELIZABETH MOORE: The exterminator is here.
Jim is going to take a look around.
We'll give him a little tour.
Now, Jim, this is the room that started
a crisis this morning for us.
Our seven year old's very attached to the little diecast,
metal cars.
Most of those are all still in the containers.
So the question or concern is that was
one thing we didn't want to have him have to give up.
Yeah, if they're still sealed in the plastic, you're fine.
BOB: How about the cardboard-- BETSY: (WHISPERING) Yes.
BOB: --on the outside. JIM: You'll be fine.
(WHISPERING) Yes.
BOB: We will?
GERALIN THOMAS: Good.
Whew.
I just saw a giant sigh of relief, Bob.
[laughter]
BOB: You heard it here, you saw it here.
OK, with that good news, let's keep moving.
OK.
Do we really want to move this family back in their house?
So, Jim, what we need from you now is a yes or no.
Do you think this is a job that you can do?
Yes, we can exterminate right now.
Great. Thank you so much.
- Thank you. - Yep, you're welcome.
Thank you, thank you, thank you.
Your hard work paid off.
JIM: When we first came here, there was clutter, piles
of stuff all over the place.
And now the inside is clean.
It's amazing the transformation.
Oh, I feel very good about being able to exterminate the house.
We'll be able to do it 100%.
BETSY: The family have been very, very
supportive through all of it, even, you know,
before the help started.
And they're here now, and they've never been judgmental.
And it's been very good, very, very good to have them here.
Thanks.
[christina laughs]
I heard you crying in the hallway.
BOB: You know, I don't need a lot of this stuff,
and the collecting, and the clutter, the hoarding.
I don't need it.
BETSY: We're looking forward to being able to spend, you know,
all our time, day and evening, in the home with the family,
and have people over now, and entertain them,
and build relationships again.
I tried to assess today what Bob's thoughts
were on how this happened.
And I didn't get the sense that he thought
the situation was extreme.
I think he may have thought that, yeah, they
were falling behind on a few things,
some projects needed to get done.
But it wasn't that bad, that they could make do.
And I think they would continue making do with the situation.
BOB: The bedbugs, yeah, if we hadn't had them,
I don't know if things would have just coalesced
and happened like they did.
What a way to look at that.
ELIZABETH MOORE: This is the first step
in the new beginning of Bob, and Betsy, and the kids--
most importantly, the kids.
BETSY: I'm exhausted.
I really am.
My body is exhausted.
But I am also extremely excited and elated about what was done.
[music playing]