It is one of the great ironies of all time
that the Trump presidency has given us more books
than ever before, which is a crazy thing,
because this is a guy
whose favorite thing to read is the Hooters T-shirt.
(laughter, groaning)
And this week, another Trump book hits the shelves.
This one from former Trump aide and reality TV star Omarosa,
and it's safe to say it's making major headlines.
MAN: Omarosa's stunning Meet the Press interview
where she tells all about her time in The White House.
...what she calls an insider's account
of the Trump White House.
They continue to deceive this nation
by how mentally-declined he is,
how difficult it is for him to process complex information.
This is a White House where everybody lies.
Donald Trump is a con,
and has been masquerading as someone who is actually open
to engaging with diverse communities.
He is truly a racist.
-Omarosa! -(laughter)
How you can say that about the president
three years after we all said that about the president?!
(laughter)
How?!
Seriously, though, Omarosa had to spend a year
in The White House to learn
that Donald Trump doesn't know what he's doing?
Like, I can't wait for her next book,
Donald Trump: Something's Wrong with His Hair.
(laughter)
But-but the revelations in Omarosa's book
aren't even the juicy part of this story,
because it turns out that unlike James Comey,
she wasn't just making notes.
She was making tapes.
WOMAN: Former presidential advisor
Omarosa Manigault Newman admitted
the she secretly recorded chief of staff John Kelly
firing her in the high-security White House Situation Room.
-OMAROSA: Can I ask you a couple questions? -Uh...
Does the president...?
Is the president aware of what's going on?
KELLY: Uh, don't... Let's not go down the road.
This is a non-negotiable discussion. Uh...
OMAROSA: I don't want to negotiate. I just...
I never talk... had a chance to talk to you, General Kelly...
-KELLY: Yeah, but... -...so if this is my departure,
I'd like to have at least an opportunity to understand.
KELLY: No. Uh... we can... we can talk another time.
This has to do with some pretty serious integrity violations,
um, so I'll let it go at that.
What's weird about this is
that Omarosa is presenting these tapes as evidence
that she was treated unfairly, but from what she released,
John Kelly doesn't sound that bad.
If anything, he just sounded like a guy
who had a lot more important things to do, you know?
He's just like, "Look,
"I can't have this conversation right now.
"The president accidentally swallowed
"the nuclear launch codes, and, uh,
we need to come up with some new ones ASAP."
Like, if anything, these tapes may have landed Omarosa
in hot water, because she took a recording device
into The White House Situation Room.
And that's the room
where presidents hold the most classified meetings,
like, highly classified.
Things that are too secret for the Oval Office.
Like, the bin Laden raid was run from the Situation Room.
I mean, I know now we don't know
what they use that room for under Trump.
I mean, I... Like, I bet
if we check the security cam footage now,
we'd just see, like, Ben Carson sneaking in to take naps,
and-and Don Junior going in there to practice his karate.
You know, it's just...
Like... (as Carson): "The true master is one
who can strike without making me up."
And as of taping the chief of staff
in the situation room wasn't scandalous enough,
today Omarosa dropped her latest mix tape,
and this one features the president himself.
Oh, and please listen to how Trump reacts
when he "finds out" Omarosa has been fired.
I don't love you leaving at all. I just found out.
They run a big operation, Omarosa.
Goddamn it!
You know, for a man who lies as much as Trump,
you'd think he'd be better at it.
He's like, "No. I'm so upset about this."
I wonder if he did this to people who got fired
from The Apprentice, if he also called them, he's like,
"Hey, Gary, I just saw last night's episode.
"What happened? What happened?
Goddamn it, I didn't know."
Now, I'll be honest. What we've heard on the tapes
is not particularly shocking.
But what is shocking is how many people
are secretly recording the President of the United States
all the time!
So many people are walking around the White House
wearing a wire, I'm surprised that there aren't
just feedback loops happening to everyone
as they walk by, like, people just having conversations like,
"Hey, I was... (imitates electronic feedback)
"Hey, your recording's interfering
"with my recording, man. Come on, come on.
"What frequency are you on? Yeah, just give me
your recording after the meeting. This weird."
Like, it's incredible, everyone has a recording
of the president-- Omarosa has one, Michael Cohen.
Even shock jocks are getting him at this point.
Like, there just needs to be a Grammy category
for these at this point. It's just gonna be like,
"And the award goes to...
Oh, Adele. Surprise, it's Adele, actually."
Now, as usual, when one of Trump's people turns on him,
the White House runs its smear campaign playbook, right?
They say the person has always been trash.
With Omarosa, they've dismissed her as a lying,
publicity-hungry reality star
who only cares about enriching herself.
And when Trump heard that, he was like,
"Are you guys looking at my résumé? Are you?"
For more on this, we turn to our senior political analyst,
-Ronny Chieng, everybody! -(cheering, applause)
Ronny...
What have we... what have we learned
from Omarosa's new book?
Well, I'll tell you what I've learned, Trevor.
There is nothing more profitable
than working for Donald Trump, okay?
Because everyone who gets fired by this guy gets a book deal.
I'm waiting for him to fire his chef,
so we can get a cookbook called 32 Burger Recipes
Our Fat Liar President Likes.
And I'll tell you what else Omarosa has taught me
is that I'm doing the right thing,
because I'm also secretly taping
everyone's conversations in this office.
-Wait, what? -(laughter)
You've been recording people at The Daily Show?
Yeah, yeah. That's how you get dirt on everybody
so you can write a bestseller after you leave.
Ronny, I feel like that's such a violation of people's trust.
Yeah. Okay, Mr. Ethics.
Maybe you'll think differently
once you hear what Roy Wood Jr. really says about you.
(laughter)
You hear that, Trevor?
Roy thinks you're just "all right."
Doesn't sound like a team player to me.
What the hell, Ronny, I gave you the whole week off.
So your grandmother isn't dead?
No, no, she's alive.
Although, the doctors say she's probably gonna die soon.
I'm thinking, like, maybe Tuesday after Labor Day.
You know, four-day weekend.
Ronny, I'm... I'm disappointed in you, man.
Oh, okay, okay, I'm the bad guy.
I bet you wish I was more like Desi, huh?
You think she's so sweet, maybe you'll think twice about her
when you hear what she says about you.
(copier machine whirring)
Ha! Suck it, Desi.
Now who's America's favorite blonde? Me.
Ronny, I don't think these tapes
are busting who you think they're busting.
Oh, yeah, you would say that Trevor,
but don't forget what I got on you.
Wow. The great Trevor Noah hanging out with drug users.
Ronny Chieng, everybody,