[Rock cover of theme from Maxwell House Coffee commercial playing]
[Bewitched: Nose twitch sound]
Jared: Hey guys! Albo & Stewart: Hey Jared!
Are you ready to try another fantastic "not coffee" beverage?
Albo: Sure are.
Okay. Well this time I have something that's been requested
This is dandelion root coffee.
And I got online, and the comments on Amazon.com
were saying that it's not strong enough.
So I... You can see I already opened it.
According to recommendations, I roasted it more.
So I took this– because I guess if you get this normally, It's more like dandelion root tea.
Albo: I've had that.
Yes, I remember you saying that, but you can make it more like coffee, it just has to be roasted more.
So I'd curious to hear about how this compares to the tea.
Albo: Sure.
Ah yes, on here it says pour 6 ounces of boiling water over 1-2 teaspoons of tea.
Steep for 5-10 minutes.
So that all seems pretty arbitrary,
so I'm gonna do
Whatever this is...
Albo: Ooh, dusty. Jared: Yeah, it is.
Jared: Oh, it's herbal too–
Jared: One more, or not one more? Stewart: One more, Let's do it.
Jared: Let's go crazy.
Albo: Yeah.
Albo: It's nice and dark. Jared: Yeah, looks like coffee-ish...
Albo: Yeah, wow. It's rich looking.
Stewart: It looks like chocolate. Jared: I'm kind of surprised by that – I thought this was gonna be... weak.
Stewart: It's much darker when it's in the water than when it's not.
Jared: Bah!
Jared: Startled me a little bit.
[Albo giggles] Jared: Uh it is very dark!
Albo: Wow that is... Stewart: Black
Albo: That is possibly darker than I drink my real coffee. Jared: That's saying something you drink very strong coffee.
Jared: It looks like like a very dark espresso. Albo: Yeah.
Jared: I'm gonna put it into these very dark cups so... Albo: We won't see anything.
Jared: It'll just be like invisible.
Albo: Oh! It's not totally pitch black.
Jared: Yeah, that does look like coffee! Dark coffee. All right. Let's try it.
So first let's give it a sniff.
Oh
That is medicinal smelling. It smells like the dandelion tea I've had.
Which has like a bitter...
Green beans But herbal yeah Green beans?
It does smell like green beans.
Oh yeah, it does.
[Chuckles]
I don't like green beans.
It's the wrong kind of bean.
Yeah...
And honeycomb. Honeycomb, green beans. Why isn't that a more popular cereal?
[Slurping sound]
Holy Mother of god! We made that really strong, I like it.
It's really strong. That tastes like coffee.
Does it? Yeah it tastes like coffee with a...
little... little...
edge of medicine...
I like this. I could just drink this
To me it just tastes very, very bitter. Well, Yeah, that's what black coffee tastes like.
Oh, yeah... I don't like black coffee.
Maybe that's that's what makes it so much like the real thing.
I usually like the black version of all these not coffees I can drink,
but this one...
This is hard for me. This is great. I would... If I didn't have coffee today – this is sort of like having coffee.
Really? You're kind of perked up. Yeah.
There's no caffeine in it either.
It's a great placebo.
It's a psychological cure.
What is the...
Science with dogs, it's that... dog science
Dog science!
[Jared and Albo Laughing]
You're having a dog science reaction.
It's like echinacea tincture. It tastes like a lot of stuff
It's like coffee and the sweet smell of hay.
It's got a little bit more of the bitter tannic flavor, the like aromatic part of it.
It's more tannic than coffee. That's the main thing that tips me off that it's not coffee.
Does it remind you of the tea though? Yeah, it tastes like the tea.
The tea has more of the aromatic quality and is bitter, but it's not this strong.
If this is like 100%, the tea is kind of like 75 or 60.
So this is definitely not like comparable to a really great cup of coffee –
Which has all sorts of qualities this doesn't have, but when it comes to like desperation coffee,
this is better than some of the desperation coffee I've had.
Okay, so it's not like your best cup of coffee, but it is still good.
It's on the low end of good.
[Albo laughs]
It's good. It does satisfy your desire for black coffee.
Yeah.
I hate to do this to you because you're enjoying that it's similar to your love of black coffee.
It's for science time, I'm science dog.
Yes, so we're gonna...
Let's do some milk and sugar. Just some milk and sugar in here and see if I could, you know,
grasp something in here other than bitter
So I'm gonna do one of these.
Stewart: Look at that.
Albo: Wow. Jared: It's like throwing milk into an abyss.
Albo: Wow, it really colors up like coffee. Jared: Yeah like a dark coffee.
Albo: Uh-huh.
Jared: But yeah that actually does look like coffee.
Stewart: Heck. Jared: Looks kinda good.
Cheers. [Cups clinking]
That tastes a lot like coffee. Yeah.
It totally disguises the floral character. Mm-hmm.
Yeah, you can pass this off...
People would be tired and disappointed, but...
[Laughter]
They would be convinced that they had coffee, and they would be confused as to why they still felt bad.
That's just because they're not science dogs though.
It's easier for me to drink. I can actually drink it now, but...
I'm still having difficulty drinking it.
Do you think if we put one less spoonful in it would have been...
I think so. I think we made it a little too strong.
I've had very strong coffee before and i've made coffee with you know too much grams, not enough water,
and although that is bitter, it's a different type of bitterness than this bitterness.
You know like this tastes bitter like in...
Like a bitter herbal cough drop kind of way to me.
If someone were to hand this to me I would not think it was coffee.
I would. You would?
I am a fool.
[Jared Laughs]
A fool for coffee.
We've got the fool for coffee, the science dog for coffee, and then there's me.
No one can fool you.
The coffee skeptic.
So on a scale of one to five, where five beans is a cup of coffee, and zero beans is not a cup of coffee.
How much of a cup of coffee is this?
How many bean does it get?
Five. Five?! Five.
That is the first five rating of this show.
Let's give a little round of applause.
[Rhythmic clapping]
Albo?
Ehm...
I... think that the floral edge, the sort of medicinal thing, would tip me off that this was not exactly coffee.
Mm-hmm.
Ehm...
If it was like with the milk and sugar I would definitely be convinced,
but I don't usually drink my coffee with milk and sugar, and so the way that it tasted before I would say;
That's not coffee. I'm just gonna give it the generous four and a half,
because even though it's not like coffee, with the milk and sugars it's completely like coffee.
I'll give it a three,
because I feel like if I were to make this a little weaker. I'd be a little bit more convinced.
I might give it like like a three and a half or a four.
If it were to be blended it would be very much like a cup of coffee I feel,
but like straight off if someone were to give this to me. I'd be like no way this is not coffee.
This is way too herbal tasting. We've got a five a four and a half and a three,
so let's give it a four.
Four cups – four beans. Four beans! That's that's pretty good.
I think this is something that, if you're looking for a coffee alternative,
or looking to lower your caffeine intake, this would do it!
I mean it gives you like a similar bitterness.
It would mix very well.
It could be a pretty decent substitute for coffee, if you if you miss coffee.
But yeah, anything else to add, guys? Dandelions clean toxins out of soil.
That's beautiful.
It's really nice.
They're nice flowers. So let's let that be our... like what is it, our aspiration for the day?
Yeah, to be like the dandelion.
Okay. I only have one minute so I have to make this fast.
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