Hi everyone, Agnes here I'm going to read you a wonderful SP success story from Nicki in a moment.
But firstly to tell you Marvin and I for those of you that have watched our interviews and
discussions before, we have done another discussion this time on reassurance. Those
of you that look for reassurance from other people, from family, from friends, from bosses,
from social media looking to get reassurance and attention that way. If that is something that you
do then this discussion is not to be missed I will put the link down below, this discussion is only
on Marvin's channel so you'll need to head over there and I'll put the link down below for those
of you that would like to watch it. So SP success story from Nicki: In 2016 my boyfriend and I had
been together for four years when he broke up with me and moved out after one of many arguments. This
now meant I had to leave the home I loved so much as I could no longer afford the rent. To say I was
beyond devastated by the whole situation was an understatement. My whole life felt meaningless.
I cycled through each and every stage of grief for days and weeks, barely able to get out of bed, not
feeding myself, not speaking with anyone for fear of judgment. I was a hot mess. I want to mention
here that a very similar thing happened with my previous boyfriend and it took me six months to
pull myself out of the despair. I am a confident person on the outside but my default response to
anything going wrong in my life was that it was my fault and I am not good enough etc. I've never
been jealous of other women so luckily I've never manifested a third party but I have manifested
interference from other people especially family members. I'd love to learn so I read and watched
and listened to anybody that could tell me how to become a better girlfriend and how to convince him
to come back. I tried to intellectualize the whole process as a coping mechanism
and the upshot of that is I now have an incredible
work working knowledge of the human mind and relationship psychology. So not all bad but
honestly it didn't help me in any way to get him back. I'm a little embarrassed now as I write this
because I couldn't be further from the person I was back then. The energy I wasted on despair,
on worry and wondering what he was doing or thinking and saying. Uh I'm exhausted just
thinking about it. But that state of desperation, of needing answers or figuring it out like an
addict how to get them back is so common and I really want to want to make it crystal clear that
it doesn't have to be that way. So back to 2016: my SP had just moved out, all of my friends were
telling me to get angry because at least that was more empowering than feeling completely defeated.
But being the way I was I couldn't do it because I had a firm belief that I was the one to blame
and deserved it in some way. My understanding of LOA had definitely formed a belief but I
now know there was so much more to it than 'The Secret' had told us 10 years ago. My mind my mind
resolved to not make the same mistake again and wasted another six months more grieving. I looked
to something else to help me to get over the relationship as fast as possible and get rid
of the constant knot in my stomach. I knew I could get over him I just wanted to feel better
as soon as possible and that's when I found Agnes' channel. Agnes introduced me to the concept that
loving yourself is the most loving thing you can do for the world. If everyone is you pushed out
then your self-concept is your reality and you will be reminded at every turn about who you are
and what happens to you in your life. I began by doing self-love meditations to take my focus
away from my SP, it was weird though more often than not I would get some sort of contact from
my SP after I would do one of these meditations. It would be some thin veiled reason to contact
me and certainly not a declaration of love but I couldn't help but notice that this kept happening.
Agnes mentioned a book by Kamal Ravikant called 'Love Yourself Like Your Life Depends On It'
and I read it cover to cover over and over - I will put the link to that book down below
for those of you that want to have a look - I still have the script running in my head
stating 'I love myself, I love myself, I love myself' and it soothes me whenever I
get overwhelmed about anything that comes up in my life. Over the period of a couple of weeks I found
myself thinking of my SP less and less. Whenever I did think of him the knot in my stomach would
resurface and I'd internally state 'I love myself, I love myself, I love myself' until it went away
or until I could get somewhere to meditate. It was the only thing I found to successfully soothe me.
Later I found a video Agnes had done with Shelley Lefkoe pertaining to Shelley and her late husband
Morty Lefkoe life's work on limiting beliefs - I'll put some info about that down below too.
Using a free tool on their website I began to identify mine - 'I'm not worthy,
I'm not good enough, men always leave me.' I began to dig deep and identify where some of
these beliefs had originated - and shocker it was my childhood. Agnes has a wonderful
Ho'oponopono meditation which I used to release these beliefs. I would often cry and let them go
and some things came up unexpectedly that I didn't even realize were holding me back - like a deep
belief that men always treat me badly. In doing this work I was giving myself permission not to
identify with this crap anymore. We often don't realize that the lens through which we view our
lives is embedded in our subconscious that we keep thinking, feeling from a place of complete
disempowerment. In releasing these beliefs which does take some time and some are
ongoing to this day, it freed up space in my mind for the positive affirmations Agnes
used in her self-love videos. I began to notice a change in my attitude towards myself,
it was very subtle at first with me spending more time on self-care,
feeding myself properly, getting out in nature, basically behaving like I would
have before the breakup - like doing all of it for myself and not to impress or affect anybody else.
This was huge for me. I was always that girl that lived her life for the guy, I worshiped him,
I put him first and when he didn't do the same for me I resented it. Sound familiar to anyone? You'll
notice I haven't spent a lot of time talking about what our relationship was like before
the breakup or pretty much anything about what he was saying and doing while we were breaking
up. The reason for this is because honestly it just doesn't matter, not even a little bit.
Circumstances don't matter but to appease those of you that are concerned they are in that unique,
irreparable situation - which doesn't exist by the way, here is the list of some things he said:
'you are toxic, you will never be the mother of my children, I don't love you, I love you
but I'm not in love with you, I'm in love with someone else, you're not going anywhere in life
,my family hates you, this is why nobody likes you, I don't care how you feel.'
Needless to say it wasn't a very healthy situation but believe me when I say that I know that I am no
victim. At some point I had honestly thought each and every one of those statements about myself
or at least believe that's what he thought about me. Everyone is me pushed out and my self-concept
was my bully. I think this is why being angry with him had never sat right with me - I
knew it was me. It's important to stress though that when I was creating this awful reality for
myself I was not a doormat, hence the arguments. It really is important to remove yourself from a
situation even though you've created it as if causing you immediate harm - (corrects)
if it's causing you immediate harm. Get yourself on track first then reassess. For
me there was no danger it was just a very hot and cold relationship. The wonderful times far
outnumbered the bad and we both excused this at the time for having artistic temperaments. So as
I was saying I originally landed on Agnes' channel to get over the relationship but as I started to
truly understand how I unconsciously created this situation I wanted to try and manifest him back
and I did - in four weeks. How? I (this is in big letters) LOVED ME. 99% of my time was now
spent looking after myself, growing my skills - I left Facebook to help with my mental diet.
I did read a lot of success stories and watched a ton of YouTube videos to compound my belief
but I took no action with him in the 3D world. My inner world was transforming though - I'd
lie in bed at night hearing Agnes' voice saying 'I am worthy, I am first best, I am good enough,
I love myself.' The other 1% was me keeping an eye on the thoughts I was having about my SP.
If I got that knot in my tummy it was because I was thinking something that my body didn't like
so I'd take the thought and flip it - 'he doesn't love you' became
'he will always love you' then another dose of 'I love myself I love myself I love myself' and that
rotten feeling dissipated. I started to view myself in the best possible light and in doing so
I viewed everyone from that same space .I was no longer assuming the worst - quite
the opposite I loved me so it was impossible for him not to. Within just a few days I was getting
more messages just asking how I was, within a few weeks those messages became loving phone calls.
Between breaking up and getting back together I think it was around two months. We are still
together and we will be celebrating nine years of our relationship in a few months. We have
done so much together over the past five years that the breakup is fading out of the memory at
this point. I'm a completely different person and funnily enough now my SP is turning up completely
differently in my life. During the covid lockdown in the UK we were two people that actually thrived
when having to spend all day together while others were breaking up. We have a business together, we
write music together and he's even interested in LOA. I couldn't have manifested a better likeness
for an ideal mate. Of course this whole manifesting business is never complete
and we both have goals in our relationship and career that we are working on at the moment. I
actually say that maintaining a happy relationship or more accurately a happy healthy sense of self
is far more than getting them back. I have no fear of him leaving me and identifying
and squashing the triggers to keep myself from slipping back into my old patterns with men.
I could have stopped myself from sabotaging and projecting issues onto my relationship.
This was my biggest challenge but I did it - persist, persist, persist. I am now with him
by choice and not because of some messed up need. The peace of mind bleeds into everything I do even
outside the relationship. If something shows up in my world that I don't like I affirm the opposite,
take whatever action is immediately immediately necessary and moving on to something else.
It always works out in my favour. I'm sorry this was so long and I encourage
each and every one of you to persist in improving your self-concept. You are perfect, you're unique,
you are loved. Listen to Agnes, I have found many more channels and teachers whom I love but Agnes
has a quality about her that just cuts through the crap when no one else can. I love her and if her
ex back course was available back when I needed it I'm certain I could have sped up the process
of healing myself. Thank you Agnes, you opened the door for me I didn't even know existed this
has become an absolute passion for me now as I grow with this new way of being and I'm loving
every moment. I'll be back with more success stories of manifestation
I'm working on at the moment and I'll be listening to all of the others that come in.
I still love a great ex back success story, thank you for everything.
Wow nice one and so well written, so thorough - thank you Nicki for sharing that
it is just beautiful, I never get tired of hearing a success story when someone's
worked on themselves and that they really understand that that really is the way
and also that you know you get to the point where you don't keep going with this 'what can I get,'
you come from a place of 'what can I give to this relationship' and it really shows
that you did the work and it's so wonderful Nicki - thank you so much for sending that in.
I will put down below the relationship success stories playlist, the SP success story playlist,
the self-love self-love success stories playlist and also the self-love meditations playlist.
And for those of you that are really struggling with still putting someone on a pedestal
there are a couple of YouTube's - 'Attraction vs Addiction' that I will put
there for you as well and also 'Suffocate them with Freedom.' All right so lots of love everyone,
that was a lovely longer success story. Hope you enjoyed it and as always I will see you in the
next YouTube. I'm going to do a lovely meditation in this amazing setting - it's quiet, it's green
and it is a beautiful hot day in London. Thanks everyone, see you as always in the next YouTube.