- That's not breaking down.
- Maybe you just weak, bro.
- I'mma slap the (beep) outta you.
- I don't know how far you would've slung me,
with your weak ass.
- Oh my, is that a eyeball?
- Okay, (beep) the butt.
Dear Lord, I'm Darren Brand.
(both laughing) - Take one. Mark.
(beep) (dramatic music)
- Boom!
- Pow!
- Row!
- Ka-chow!
(imitates hadouken)
(imitates battle cry)
(both laughing)
- I'm Darren Big Baby Brand.
- What's up y'all, I'm Tim Chantarangsu.
- Another phenomenal episode
and season of "Basic to Bougie".
- Wow, you guys are so excited right now,
you can't even contain yourself.
- These are facts. These are facts.
- So you already know what it is, man.
It's your favoritest show where we try three different kinds
of two different foods and try to determine
what is the cheapest, middlest, and most expensive.
- Because, what we've learned over and over.
Some basic food can be bougie.
- Yeah. - And some bougie food,
in fact, is basic. (record scratching)
- That's crazy. - That's crazy.
- Because that makes sense. - Yeah, it does. It does.
Basic round coming up. - Okay.
- What will they come up with next?
- Man, whatever they show us right now, it's gonna be
completely different- - Completely different, yeah.
- When they bring out the food.
- It's gonna be like desserts, but it's gonna be cake,
cookies, and some kind of gelatin.
- Or it's gonna be like a steak
that's shaped like a ice cream cone. (laughs)
- Yeah.
All right, man, let's get into a basic round.
Basic. - "Basic to Bougie"!
(intense music)
- He didn't say be careful, he didn't say watch out.
Whenever he just drops it, I feel good.
- It's either good or bad. - Yeah.
- Oh, wait.
- Salad.
- It's more about what's in the middle.
- Here we go. Here we go, you hear it?
- Oh, oh, oh. Ranch.
- No. (buzzer)
(both laughing)
- You sound so disappointed when you almost get it,
and he's like, "Uh, no." (Tim laughs)
- The overarching umbrella.
- Oh, dressing.
- No. (buzzer)
- Yeah, get mad, yeah get attitude.
Let him know how you feel. - Less of
putting it over something and more of-
- Dip. (bell dings)
- Boom! - Okay.
- Look at me. Look, oh no.
That could be anything.
- It could be literally anything.
- Oh my, 'cause when I'm thinking of dip,
I'm thinking of the good dips.
- You thinking of just some delicious, simple ranch.
Maybe some salsa.
(belching)
But watch, watch it be like ground up kidneys.
- I don't...
Beans.
- Beans, beans they're good for your heart.
- Beans, beans. - Beans, beans,
they're healthy for you.
(Tim laughs) - Bring on the dip.
(upbeat music)
- So- - Why can't we just do
stuff regular. - Right, because,
why would they put seven layers-
- In a glass! - It was ridiculous.
- I've never wanted to try a dip that had a fish
split in half. (Tim laughs)
- With his eyeball over the brim of the bowl like this,
looking at me, I've never wanted to do that.
- Darren! (water sloshing)
- Come on, bro, follow me out.
(Tim gasps)
- It's still alive, Darren!
- No, it's not. Don't do that Tim.
- It's a live fish! - That's not funny.
Stop, stop. (plates shaking)
- All right. (laughs)
- How we gonna get to the bottom of this Tim?
- Fingers? - These ain't even-
These ain't even strong enough to get nowhere.
I can't get no dip, I just got whatever's up top.
Look at this, it broke.
(dark organ music)
- Dear Lord I'm Darren Brand.
(both laughing)
- Bruh, I just want, I just, I just,
simplicity's fine with me.
Let's get into it.
(intense upbeat music)
(Tim laughing)
- Ah!
- Oh!
What is that?
Did y'all give us dog food?
(dog barking) - You got some beans,
I don't know what this layer is,
guacamole.
- I don't even know what that, oh my God.
- Yeah, what's the middle one? Is the middle one cheese?
(chips crunching)
Mm.
Mm-hmm, you like it.
- It's okay. It's not bad, but I do like dip.
I'm a big fan of dip.
♪ Now dip, baby, dip ♪
- Come on, now.
- One more. (chip crunches)
- Here we go. - Mm-hmm.
(chip crunches)
- Okay. - Okay.
- There's no reason to put in a glass.
Y'all could have put in a bowl.
- Yeah. - A bowl would've been fine.
Like this little baby crock pot.
- Oh, it was a parfait. (tires squealing)
(audience gasps)
It was a Mexican dip parfait. (laughs)
- That's not dip. (Tim laughs)
All right, let's get the fish head out the way.
(intense upbeat music)
- You want the head or the tail?
Heads or tails?
(Darren chuckles) (air horn blares)
Okay, I'll eat the butt.
Let me (beep) from the back real quick.
- Oh my God, the teeth is, look at that.
Tim no.
- Please! - Tim, no, please, please.
- And then (Tim spurts).
Little fish fart at you, out the butt.
This is good.
- Debatable. - Mm-hmm.
- I'mma do this for the culture.
(air horn blares) - Gonna take a bite?
I'll take some bite of the fish too.
How much of that, did you take a giant bite of the head?
Wow, look at you.
- Am I supposed to eat this?
(group laughs)
It's not breaking down.
Am I not? (people chuckling)
This is just decor? - It's decoration, yeah.
- It's not breaking down. (Tim laughs)
- It's not breaking down. - Not breaking down.
I'm literally chewing, nothing's happening.
- You're like, it's plastic!
- I wasn't supposed to eat it was I?
- It was just for fun. (people laughing)
- That's what I get for committing.
Oh my, is that a eyeball?
- Whoa the eyeball fell out, you wanna eat it?
- Oh, yo!
- You gonna eat it? - No.
I wasn't even supposed to eat it at all.
Much less it's eyeball. - Wow.
- Damn.
That definitely was the eyeball, look.
- Nemo swim all the way back home
just for you to do that to him.
Terrible.
Oh, swim back up. (laughs) (belches)
- Yeah just. (water sloshing)
(upbeat music)
Now here, this is where I'm at, right here.
Warm, look how that cheese breakdown.
You know what that is? - Mm!
- You know what that is?
Oh my God. - Spinach artichoke dip.
- One of the top dips
of all dips. - Mm, I love it.
- And it's warm.
- Wow. - And if I had to pick
any kind of cracker to eat it with.
- Oh, the schmidtz? - Yes, absolutely.
- Mm, mm. - Mm-hmm.
Or.
(people laughing)
- Fancy, fancy crackers. (Darren laughs)
- Yeah.
All right, let's rate.
(upbeat music)
- All right. - All right.
- Cheapest.
- Why? - Gotta be.
- This could be the cheapest,
don't let the presentation fool you.
- The spinach artichoke dip?
- It's not an expensive thing.
It's a common appetizer at most restaurants.
- But this is a common appetizer at most house parties.
Wait, you got me second guessing myself.
- Okay. - Because of the crackers.
Yeah, cheaper, cheaper, cheaper.
- Why's this more expensive, because of the fish?
- Yeah, and I mean, just look at
all the ingredients in there.
- All right. (Tim laughs)
Glass pile, cheapest. - Yeah. Yeah.
Spinach artichoke dip. - Spinach artichoke, middlest.
Fish friends, most expensive.
- Let's do it. - Thanks, bro.
Oh, Tim!
- No. - Tim!
- For real?
- What? - You lying.
- Got it all right.
- Yes!
- Cheapest, vegan.
Oh my God! - Wow.
- I knew it was off. - And we liked it.
- Oh no, I never said I liked it.
- I liked it. - I never said I liked it.
Cheapest, vegan seven layer dip, $7, another classic dip.
But this time, vegan friendly, refried beans,
salsa, spices, avocado, vegan cheddar cheese,
tomatoes and black olives from a health food store.
- Vegan beans too? - Yeah.
- Crazy. - Whole thing.
Middlest hot spinach dip, $10.
Classic rich and filling appetizer from a chain restaurant.
I knew it, it tasted familiar. - Mm-hmm.
- Most expensive, smoked trout dip, $15.
Subtle and intoxicatingly?
- Intoxicatingly smokey creamy dip.
- Who wrote that? (Tim laughs)
- Someone that loves the dip.
- Smokey, creamy dip made with German smoked trout,
horse radish, paprika, and fresh dill.
- Cool. - That's good.
We got it right. - We did it.
- We know dip.
- Okay. We are prepared.
♪ Put your hands up on your hip ♪
♪ When I dip you dip ♪
♪ We dip ♪
♪ Uh-huh ♪
- Let's bougie it up. - Let's bougie.
(classical music)
- I'm feeling good. - Let's get it.
Big dog. (Tim sighs)
No careful, no warnings, it's hot, no, none of that?
- Think you're good.
- We're good, all right, man.
Bougie round. Bougie round.
- Oh okay. Texture. Oh.
- What the (beep) is this?
- What is this?
- Why it break like that? - What is this?
What is this? - Say it again.
- What is this? - I don't know, Tim.
That's what we're trying to figure out.
Is it multiple items?
- It's just sort of the broader, not what's really inside,
but what's- - Here we go with this (beep).
(group laughs)
- That's why they mic them up.
- That's why, yeah that's why,
'cause he has explained everything to us.
- They'll never figure it out.
- Yeah, nothing's simple.
- So close, you're so, you know it.
- Is it tempura? (bell dings)
- Oh! - Yeah.
- Oh my God, there's no telling.
Oh my, I don't even get excited no more.
- Right? Because it could be anything.
- It could be anything.
Let's do it. - Let's get it.
(upbeat orchestra music)
So, you know what? It doesn't look crazy.
But what's in here, Darren?
- It's a dragon egg.
- Or it could be a- - Your grace.
- Goat testicle, your grace.
The testes of a goat- - Tim.
- Your grace. - No, no, no.
We're not even gonna think to go down that route.
How did you get a shrimp tempura pizza?
- It could be anything.
- Nah, it can't, it's like fried.
- No, no, I'm saying it's tempura, but I don't,
it's not necessarily shrimp.
Could be anything. - Yeah, tempura, my bad.
- Yeah. Yeah. - Yeah, I just.
- It looks like, is this honey on it?
What is this?
Mm, it's honey.
- Mm.
- Where you wanna go?
- Don't matter.
You know when people pull out chopstick,
they think they're better than you.
- Oh, you ready?
Let's do that then.
Look at this man, cultured.
- Mm-hmm.
(upbeat orchestral music)
- I think this is just good old solid tempura.
I don't think this a, mm.
- Mm-hmm. - Mm-hmm.
- They're like tempura roll.
- Mm-hmm, that's good.
- [Tim] What's in the middle?
- [Darren] I don't know. Why's it pink?
- I don't know.
Is it just, is it shrimp or what is in the middle?
- I think us finding out might make it worse.
- Oh wait, this might be like, is this some type of,
is this straight vegetables in here?
Oh, mushroom maybe.
What is that?
Oh wait, is it oyster?
Oh, it's oysters in there.
- You just named seven items.
(Tim laughs)
Which one is it?
- I think it's a oyster.
- Confirming this is oysters.
- I will settle with oysters. - All right, bet.
Do we go to the pizza?
- Let's go this one. - The dragon egg?
- 'Cause I think it's ice cream in there.
(lighthearted orchestral music)
Mm goat testicle ice cream.
- I'm 100% sure that's not a-
(banging)
- That was not the expected.
Ooh, it's ice cream!
Lieutenant Dan, ice cream!
- Why's it not breaking?
- Because it's cold still.
Lemme try chopstick.
(people laughing)
Oh!
You gotta stab through it.
(dramatic music)
Maybe you just weak, bro.
I got through mine.
- I'mma slap the (beep) outta you.
- I got through mine easy brother.
(Darren laughs)
- There it is.
Mm. Mm. - Mm-hmm.
- Now that's good. - Mm-hmm.
- No, that's really good.
Now the work to get to it.
- I was waiting for you- - Unnecessary.
- It was taking forever. (tires squealing)
I was like, Darren, come on man.
We got a show to do, dawg.
Man up, bro, I thought you had muscles, bro.
What's taking you so long,
that's what I was saying in my head.
- I'm glad you didn't say it out loud.
I would've slung your ass across the set.
- I don't know how far you would've slung me,
with your weak ass.
(group laughs)
(Tim laughs)
You ready?
Ah!
- All right, that's actually good though.
- Yep. - Let's do it.
Pizza last.
(lighthearted orchestral music)
This is gonna be so crunchy.
- I hope so. - Here, let's do it.
- All right. (pizza crunches)
- Oh God.
- Okay, you really got to get in there.
There's some pepperoni and some cheese.
- Where? - It's about right-
- But if I don't get pepperoni by this bite,
it's not pizza. - It's a lot of crunch.
- This is too much.
This is like fair food.
- Mm-hmm. - Deep fried pizza.
Like, come on man.
I'm good on that. - Yep.
- That's good though. - Okay.
- Let's rate.
(dramatic music)
Ice cream most expensive.
- Okay. - I think.
- Yeah, yeah.
- I think this is the cheapest.
I think, trying to do the pizza in this matter
is the middlest. - I'm not mad.
The only thing that would have me questioning
is because of oysters, but I feel like
they're probably frozen anyway, so yeah,
I can do it like that. - But are you confirming
those are oysters, though?
- I'm like 90%.
(belches)
- I don't even know what that was coming up anymore.
(Tim laughs)
That could still be the fish down there.
- Or it could be the oyster. (imitates swimming)
- Did you touch my nipple?
- Yeah, boop. (bell dings)
(Tim laughs)
- You actually violate me quite often on this show, bro.
We done got way too close to feel comfortable
to touch another man's nipple and with confidence.
- That's love dog. - No it's not.
- I don't do that to everybody.
- I feel like you do. - No, I really don't.
- You walk on the set, "Morning."
- Only you, dawg. - Morning guys! Do do do.
(both laughing)
All right here we go.
Cheapest, middlest, most expensive.
- All right. - Good?
- Yes sir. - You wanna read it?
- Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
- All right.
- No, no, no, no. I'll do it, thank you.
(Tim breathes)
- Nope, yup, nope.
- Cheapest pizza tempura, $6.
A NYC meat lover slice with pepperoni sausage-
- That is not meat Lovers, number one.
- Pepperoni, sausage, ham, bacon, plus a-
- No sausage, nor ham is in there.
- It was in there. It was deep in there.
Plus a Japanese spin, it's fried in tempura batter
and drizzled with honey, mm-hmm.
Number two, whoa.
- Ice cream. - Yeah.
- What? - Yeah.
- Go.
- Middlest tempura green tea ice cream, $12,
battered and fried ice cream,
perfect as a sweet and refreshing dessert.
- Green Tea ice cream?
- You look like you just learned that you like
green tea ice cream. - I do like green tea.
I've never had it in the ice cream form.
- Thank you "Basic to Bougie". - Thank you B2B.
- And most expensive, tempura oyster sushi roll.
$21 fresh oysters made with lettuce, avocado, cucumber,
inside a pink soy bean wrapper drizzled with eel sauce.
- We definitely should've had oysters last,
'cause oysters are a delicacy.
We got it wrong.
We got it wrong. - All the way. All the way.
- And it's crazy, you should know tempura.
- Wow. - No, no, no.
- Oh whoa, okay man, I'm Darren, Big Baby Brand.
- Wow, I'm offended. - False.
Oh false, you are not offended.
- I am Tim Chantarangsu, and I'm offended.
And thank you for watching "Basic to Bougie".
Make sure you like, comment, share, subscribe.
- I bet with him like tempura, like Tim got this.
- Wow.
Just doesn't know when to quit.
(Darren laughs)
I bite the fish, this is good.
Nobody was like, "Darren wait!"
- Oh wait, looks like you might bite that poison fish head.
- Why would you add? (Tim laughs)
♪ MTV ♪