>>> THE PARIS ZOO WAS EVACUATED ON FRIDAY AFTER DOZENS OF
BABOONS ESCAPED THEIR ENCLOSURE STARRING DWAYNE THE ROCK
JOHNSON. >>> BORDER PROTECTION EIGHTS ARE
BEING CRITICIZED AFTER THEY ARRESTED A WOMAN ON A GREYHOUND
BUS IN FLORIDA WHO DIDN'T HAVE PROOF OF HER CITIZEN.
YOU DON'T EXPECT THINGS ON A GREYHOUND BUS IN FLORIDA TO GET
WORSE. >>> THE PHILADELPHIA EALINGS
WILL FACE THE NEW ENGLAND PATRIOTS IN
THIS YEAR'S SUPER BOWL. MAKING IT THE FIRST SUPER BOWL
WHERE THE FANS HAVE EVEN WORSE BRAIN DAMAGE THAN THE PLAYERS.
YEAH! GO GIANTS.
GO GIANTS. COME ON.
ZLRCHLGS. >>> AT LEAST A DOZEN CAMELS HAVE
BEEN DISQUALIFIED FROM A BEAUTY PAJT BECAUSE THEY HAD LIP
INJECTIONS. OTHER THAN THAT IT WAS A NORMAL
CAMEL PAGEANT. SOME OLYMPIC FANS ARE EXCITED
AFTER IT WAS ANNOUNCED THAT TONGA'S SHIRTLESS OILED UP FLAG
BEARER FROM THE SUMMER GAMES, HAS QUALIFIED FOR THE UPCOMING
WINTER OLYMPICS. WHERE HE WILL BE THE FIRST GUY
TO DO THE LUGE WITHOUT NEEDING A SLED.
>>> BICARDI RUM ANNOUNCED THEIR MERGING WITH PATRON TEQUILLA,
BUT I THOUGHT THEY ALREADY MERGED TO FORM PIT BULL.
>>> OSCAR NOMINATIONS ARE OUT THIS WEEK, JOINING ME IS THE
HOST OF YOU TUBE'S "BAILEY AT THE MOVIES," HERE IS BAILEY
GIZMER. >> HOW ARE YOU DOING, WE'RE GLAD
TO HAVE YOU, I'M A BIG FAN OF YOUR YOUTUBE CHANNEL.
>> I DIDN'T REALIZE YOU KNEW LIKE EVERYTHING ABOUT ME, ALL
RIGHT, I GUESS MICHAEL CHE IS MY STALKER.
I JUST KIDDING. I KNOW YOU'RE NOT.
SORRY. >> SO BAILEY.
LET'S HEAR YOUR THOUGHTS ON THIS YEAR'S OSCAR MOVIES.
>> OKAY, THIRSTY? ALL RIGHT, SO "THE SHAPE OF
WATER" WAS LIKE, I DON'T KNOW, IT WAS LIKE WEIRD.
IT WAS JUST LIKE SO WEIRD. >> YEAH, IT WAS KIND OF OUT
THERE, WHAT ELSE DID YOU SEE? >> SO I SAW "THREE BILLBOARDS."
IT WAS WEIRD, TOO. I DON'T KNOW, LIKE THAT LADY PUT
UP THOSE BILLBOARDS AND I WAS LIKE OKAY, RANDOM?
>> OKAY. YOU KNOW WHAT'S GETTING A LOT OF
BUZZ IS "CALL ME BY YOUR NAME." >> STOP.
STOP. I ACTUALLY LIKED THAT ONE A LOT.
IT WAS REALLY GOOD. >> YOU DID, WHAT ABOUT ARMY
HAMMER, DID YOU LIKE HIM? >> STOP IT.
OH MY GOD, YES I LIKED HIM. I DIDN'T LIKE HIM LIKE HIM.
I JUST LIKE THOUGHT HE WAS GOOD IN IT.
>> SOUNDS LIKE YOU MIGHT HAVE A CRUSH ON HIM.
>> NO, WHY WOULD YOU SAY THAT, OH MY GOD.
LIKE, JUST BECAUSE I'M FRIENDS WITH A LOT OF GUYS DOESN'T MEAN
I LIKE HIM, LIKE. I TRY TO BE FRIENDS WITH GIRLS,
AND I JUST GET ALONG WITH GUYS BETTER.
AND ITARM -- IF ARMY HAMMER SEES THIS, I'M GOING TO BE SO UPSET.
>> I'M NOT -- [ LAUGHTER ]
I'M NOT UPSET. I'M JUST LIKE REALLY DEALING
WITH A LOT. I DON'T KNOW LIKE, I KNOW YOU
GUYS ONLY HAVE TO DO THE SHOW LIKE ONCE A WEEK, BUT I'M LIKE
SO STRESSED EVERY NIGHT. WITH LIKE THE PLAY, OR YEARBOOK,
OR LIKE WHEN I HAVE TO BOWL WITH MY DAD.
I HAD MONO LIKE THE WHOLE YEAR, AND LIKE SO I DIDN'T EVEN GET TO
GO ON THE FRENCH TRIP. >> LOOK, BAILEY, YOU DID A GREAT
JOB, WE'RE ALL REALLY PROUD OF YOU.
>> OKAY, COOL, THEN YOU LIKE THIS AND LIKE MY REVIEWS THAN
CLICK THE LIKE BUTTON BLOW AND SUBSCRIBE.
>> THIS IS NOT YOUTUBE, THIS IS LIVE TELEVISION.
>> RANDOM, WHAT >> For "Weekend Update," I'm
Michael Che >> I'm Colin Jost. Good night!
♪♪♪