-Donald Trump fell asleep again
during his New York criminal trial.
And while to most that may seem like a bad thing
to his lackeys in the right wing media,
that actually makes him a hero.
For more on this, it's time for "A Closer Look."
[ Cheers and applause ]
Despite his many criminal charges and financial penalties,
Trump remains completely unrepentant.
Trump can't even stay awake during his criminal trial,
as he showed yet again on Tuesday.
-The former president's eyes are reportedly closed
again as he listens to testimony
from the third prosecution witness of the day.
-There was some belief that Donald Trump was indeed sleeping
today, and certainly that he had his eyes closed
for much of the time.
-His eyes are closed a lot, and to me,
what I will say is he appears to be at rest
for considerable periods of time.
Every time I looked up today,
particularly during the first part of the day,
Donald Trump's eyes were closed.
He could have been meditating.
He could have been napping.
That's not for me to say,
other than I think he appeared to be at rest.
-I love the euphemisms.
Reporters are talking about a former president
like he's a sick cat.
Is Mr. Butterscotch okay?
We gave him the dewormer, and now he appears to be at rest.
[ Laughter ]
Maybe it's not for you to say, but I'll say it.
He wasn't [bleep] meditating.
[ As Trump ] It was something I wanted to do today.
What was it? Alright. Quiet reflection.
Mel, Mel.
If you're looking for me, I'll be out of the koi pond.
[ Laughter ]
[ Normal voice ] I can guarantee you Trump
has never meditated in his life.
Although, now that I think of it,
there were a few days in '68
where he overlapped with the Beatles in Rishikesh.
[ As Trump ] Give peace a chance.
All you need is love, peace, love and money.
Let's not forget money and power.
Of course you need power, too, peace, love, money and power.
And of course, the other thing you need total
and complete immunity for all crimes committed as president.
Ringo knows what I'm talking about.
I remember the Maharishi came up to me.
Big guy, spiritual guy,
tears pouring down from his eyes
onto his magnificent beard.
And he said to me, Mr. Trump, sir, build the wall.
[ Laughter ]
Namaste.
[ Normal voice] By the way,
I wanted to point out real quick we predicted on Monday
that Trump would fall asleep again.
We missed Trump falling asleep in court.
But guys, good news.
I think it's going to happen again.
You guys, I'm not an expert in many things,
but when it comes to Donald Trump,
I'm like an FBI profiler.
If you ever flees justice,
I can tell the Feds exactly where he is.
Gentlemen, you can call off the search.
He's in the bathroom in Mar-A-Lago
with his head stuck in a bucket of chicken like Winnie the Pooh.
[ Laughter ]
I know we spent a lot of time on Trump falling asleep,
but I still have one more thing to say about this.
In a segment we're calling --
"Seth Has One More Thing To Say About This."
If your main criticism of your opponent is that he's sleepy,
so much so that you call him "Sleepy Joe,"
then I would say that your one job as a candidate
is to not fall asleep in public.
And again, you called her Crooked Hillary
and have since been indicted four times.
So we should have seen this coming.
When Trump gives someone a nickname,
it's only a matter of time before he can apply it to him.
If he ever calls someone
"hides in a suitcase to get smuggled to Russia Bob"
just know he's in that extra large Samsonite.
You can say a lot of things about Joe Biden.
Yes. He's old.
Yes, he sometimes flubs a word
or loses steam in the middle of a story,
but at least he doesn't pass out his own criminal trial
like he's on a redeye to Barcelona.
If you can't make it through your own trial
for defrauding voters during a presidential election
without nodding off,
how are you going to make it through your
daily security briefings as president?
Are you going to put a bunk bed in the Situation Room?
Who's going to be on the bottom?
Rudy. Oh, here's a good idea.
Just paint Rudy eyes on the outside of your eyelids
and it'll look like you're always awake.
[ Laughter ]
And now he's the only one who will be sleeping tonight.
This has been...
Trump falling asleep in court has been such a problem
that his lawyers are considering various tactics
to keep him awake during the trial.
Oh, did a stack of papers
not work at keeping Donald Trump awake?
Have you also tried Dramamine soaked in bourbon?
Trying stack of papers to keep Donald Trump awake
is like trying to get a dog to stop licking
its stitches by giving it a Rubik's Cube.
Also, when you said devices,
I was hoping you meant like a cattle prod
or the "Clockwork Orange" eye clamps.
So far, there only seem to be one thing
that actually works when it comes to keeping Trump awake.
Showing him video clips of himself.
-What's interesting is there is a witness from C-Span.
The whole point of this witness was to bring into evidence
a few pieces of video,
all of which were Trump at various rallies saying
how horrible all these women were
and that he's never met any of them,
you know, who were accusing him of these affairs.
Never met any of them. They're liars. It's fabricated.
And basically to play those words again and again.
But then they play the little clip and Trump goes from this
and listening, not asleep, but leaning in
because he has a little monitor right in front of him.
Trump watching Trump.
Trump watching Trump is a fully engaged,
very invigorated individual.
-When he watches clips of himself,
he's an engaged, invigorated individual.
That's how you describe a patient
who just got out of a coma.
They're talking about him like he's a monkey
who just saw a magic trick.
He's engaged. He's invigorated.
He stopped throwing his own feces.
Everyone who actually witnesses Trump's behavior in courtroom
describes him like he's barely even a functioning adult human,
except for his loyal servants and right wing media.
The same people who routinely accuse Joe Biden
of being in cognitive decline
now see Trump's inability to stay awake
during his own criminal trial not as a flaw,
but as a relatable quality or even a heroic act of defiance.
-Did Donald Trump nod off for a moment?
Good for him. These things are boring.
-I'd be falling asleep at that trial, too?
-Trump appearing to sleep and be bored is exactly the response
this Kafkaesque persecution deserves.
Trump should go to trial,
bring a big book, big fat John Grisham novel.
Just sit there and read.
-Again, He's not going to read.
Even if he did have a John Grisham book,
you'd be able to tell he'd only seen the movie.
Oh, the Firm, great book. What part are you at?
[ As Trump ] Tom Cruise just met Gene Hackman,
and they're really --
They're really getting into it.
[ Laughter ]
[ Normal voice ] You have to have very little self-awareness
to criticize Joe Biden for being old,
but then call Trump a hero for falling asleep
when Biden does something silly.
At least we make fun of him on this show.
You know how many times we played the clip of him
tripping up the stairs?
We would never play that and say,
Good for him. Stairs are dumb.
If I was walking up them, I tripped too.
So the MAGA crowd thinks Trump is a hero
for falling asleep at his own criminal trial.
And that's why Trump is so unrepentant.
He knows his most loyal servants will never abandon him,
no matter what he says or does.
For example, Trump and his allies
have been drawing up plans to get revenge
on Trump's political opponents
using the Justice Department.
Trump has also called for the Manhattan D.A.
overseeing the criminal trial, Alvin Bragg, to be prosecuted.
But when Trump was confronted with those comments
by an interviewer for "Time" magazine this week,
he pretended he never made them.
Here's that exchange from the transcript --
[ Laughter ]
What do you mean, "No"?
You can't just turn down a fact check
like it's an hors d'oeuvre at a dinner party.
Although there was a way
to change that question to get a yes.
I can pull it up.
No. It's a clip of you.
[ As Trump ] Let me see, let me see, let me see.
Color me engaged and invigorated.
[ Normal voice ] It's just mind boggling that he still gets away
with saying no to true things.
What else did Trump say no to in this interview?
You lost the popular vote twice.
Nope. You were impeached twice.
Didn't happen. You've been indicted four times.
Not true. You have five children.
I'm aware of only the one.
Which one? Ivanka.
What about Donald Trump Jr? No relation.
You're not related to Donald Trump Jr?
Never heard of him.
I can pull up the birth certificate.
No. It's right here.
No, it's not.
Under "Father" it says "Donald John Trump."
No relation. That's your name.
No it's not. Then what's your name?
[Imitates snoring]
[ Laughter ]
The rest of this interview, however,
is very much worth reading
because while he avoids specifics whenever possible,
Trump nonetheless makes it clear
that he would expand the presidency
into an imperial entity nearly unlimited in its power.
He would construct camps and deploy the military
to deport millions of people.
He would allow Red states to prosecute anyone
who violates an abortion ban.
He would fire any US attorney
who refuses to prosecute his political opponents,
and he's weighing pardons
for all January 6th insurrectionists,
among many other things.
It's a chilling vision of a possible future
that could well be imminent.
If Trump wins a second term.
The only way we can avoid it is if Trump loses,
which would be more likely if he's...
-Napping.
This has been "A Closer Look."
[ Cheers and applause ]
Hey everyone, If you enjoyed "A Closer Look,"
that's enough for me.
I don't need you to do anything else.
I made it, you watched it.
I don't need you to, like, subscribe, or do anything else
but live your life.
Whatever it is you've been dreaming of doing now
is when I want you to do it.
I'm gonna stick around because I got...
nowhere else to be.
Go.
Go do whatever it is you've always --
I mean, don't just [bleep] watch, like, Kimmel videos.
[ Laughter ]