- Hi I'm Charli, and I'm an introvert.
Today I wanna talk to you about being an introvert
and what that's meant for me as a designer,
how it's affected my career and share some advice
for my fellow introverts out there
for dealing with networking situations,
presenting your work, and just
embracing the fact that you're an introvert.
(upbeat music)
I've mentioned in videos a couple of times
that I'm an introvert and there's always someone
who comments saying, I never would have guessed that.
I would have assumed you were an extrovert.
And it's the same with people
who meet me in person sometimes.
They assume I'm an extrovert because I'm not shy and quiet
and the type of person that people assume an introvert
is going to be.
Well the thing is, whether
you're an introvert or an extrovert
is all about where you get your energy from.
So as an introvert I get my energy
from recharging being by myself,
and when I'm around a group of other people,
even a very small group of other people,
it can drain my energy and I need that alone time
to recharge and like get my energy back.
Whereas, extroverted people will get their energy
from being around other people.
They'll feed off their energy.
They'll feed off the conversations.
And that is what excites them and fills them with energy
and when they're alone they can often feel drained
and like they crave that group situation more, I suppose.
That's not to say that extroverts don't like
being by themselves or need time by themselves.
And it's also not to say that introverts
don't enjoy spending time with other people.
It's all about just where you get your energy from.
I actually place a lot of value in
making good connections with people
and having conversations, getting to know people,
but for me it's a conscious choice of spending
my energy when I'm doing that, if that makes sense.
So I'm an introvert who enjoys
spending my energy on being around people.
If you've never taken a personality test before
and you're very confused by everything
that I've talked about so far,
I would highly recommend you go and do one.
I think it's a bit of fun,
and even though they're definitely a pseudoscience,
like I think they're a little bit more accurate
than star signs because the results that you get
are based on your answers to questions
and not just like when you were born.
But yeah, how accurate can an online quiz really be?
This is not actual science, but it's a bit of fun
and I think that anything that can help you
understand yourself better or just,
yeah being more self aware,
that can't be a bad thing.
And I definitely have enjoyed reading
about my personality type and I feel like I relate
to a lot of the things that it says I work well at
and what my weaknesses are,
and it's been good for me to just
get to understand it a little bit more.
So go ahead and take one.
You can just search for any Myers-Briggs personality test
and it'll give you like four letters
that describe one of the personalities that you are.
But my favorite one I think is 16 Personalities.
I'll leave a link to that one down in the description.
If you're interested I am an INFJ,
which is known as the advocate on the 16 Personalities site,
and I'll leave a link to that as well
if you feel like you want to get to know me better,
but I also relate to a bit of INFP and ISFJ as well,
so it's good to have a read of all the profiles
because some of them you will connect with more than others
and some you will feel like that is definitely not me
and some you'll feel like, yeah,
I agree with this bit but not this bit.
You know what I mean?
But all that nitty gritty and letters aside,
the main thing for me with taking a personality test
for the first time was understanding
what an introvert was,
what introversion was as opposed to extroversion.
I think that a lot of the time being
an extrovert is seen as the ideal,
and that being an introvert is something
that you have to overcome.
And I wholly disagree with that.
I think that us introverts have our own strengths.
I think perhaps it's seen that way
because our workforce, right, like the regular workplace
is kind of set up more
for extroverted people to succeed, right?
With being around people all the time.
Careers where you have to network a lot to get into it,
involves being around groups of people.
So sometimes it can feel like us introverts
have to overcome a few things in order to succeed.
But, like I said, we do have our own strengths.
Introverts are very independent people.
We don't rely on anyone else to get our energy, right?
We can just get it from being by ourselves.
And I think that's a pretty powerful thing
to not have to rely so much on other people in that way.
Introverts are also more about depth
than they are about breadth, if that makes sense.
So rather than getting to know a little bit about everything
and being like an all arounder,
we prefer to go deep dive on a topic
and really get to know it.
Also in group situations we tend to be quieter,
like not talking so much,
so it means we do more listening.
We notice things, we take things in,
and we build this understanding and empathy,
which I think is especially great for design.
However, if we're getting real about our careers
then we know that networking and building a network,
getting to know people, making connections,
is really important.
And networking events and conferences
can be really difficult for introverts.
Like I said, I like to spend my energy on these things,
because I do really actually enjoy getting to know
people in that way and having a good conversation.
But the thing is you cannot guarantee
that a good conservation and a good connection
will be made at every networking event.
So it is always difficult for me to force myself
to like actually go to the thing.
I make myself go because I want to make the space for that.
I want to open myself up to the possibility
of these deeper connections and conversations.
And I know that I can't get that if I just
stay in my apartment all the time.
I think for me as well as introversion
there's a little bit of social anxiety going on there,
but I very rarely regret it when I
do go along to one of these events.
And I want to give you some tips for how to cope at one
if you struggle with this, too.
I saw a video from Amy Landino recently,
who is a really great person to follow on YouTube,
by the way, if you're not already,
but she talked about being an introvert
and the fact that she can turn it on when she needs to,
and I feel like it's kind of the same for me.
It's not that you're faking it and that you're faking
having this personality that you can talk to people.
It's more like I'm making a conscious choice
that this is how I'm spending my energy, right?
So I'm gonna pour it all out of me.
And I know I'm gonna go home absolutely drained
and not be able to do anything for a while after
and need that time to recharge.
But it's this conscious choice to spend my energy
for the possibility of making these deeper connections.
Accepting that makes it easier for me
to strike up a conversation or like keep on going,
and I liken it to going to the gym or something.
Like, doing squats.
It's not a super fun activity to do,
you're not super comfortable when you're doing it,
but you wanna see the end results, right?
You wanna get fit and like
improve your muscle tone and whatever.
And so you do it even though you don't particularly like,
it's not your favorite thing to do.
That's kind of how I think of networking
and how I can go into it with enthusiasm,
because I know that whatever I put in
is gonna be what I get out.
So I can go in and strike up a conversation
and talk to someone even if I don't feel totally confident
and comfortable because I know that that's something
I have to do to get to a stage where I will be comfortable
and like confident talking to this new person
and forming that connection with them.
I like to set very realistic expectations
with myself as well.
I don't go to a networking event or a conference
trying to meet everybody and be like this social butterfly
who's like, I don't know, the queen of the party,
that sort of thing.
I say when I go to one of these things
that I just want to have one good conversation
or meet like one really interesting and invaluable person.
And if I can achieve that then that's great
and I can call it a success.
Again, this is about that depth
rather than breadth that introverts have
where they would prefer to get to know someone deeply
rather than get to know everyone.
So I embrace that by just trying to meet one person.
After a particularly good conference talk or something,
it's always good to turn to the person next to you
and like bring up one of the subjects
that the speaker mentioned.
It's a good way to break the ice
and get to talking about something right away
that's not the weather.
On my podcast Design Life, we actually did an episode
about networking as well,
and one of our community members,
because we have this community for our podcast
of designers, freelancers, creative people,
and in it Isan, I think, was who suggested this said that
what he asked people at conferences or events
or whatever when he wants to get to know them is
what brings you hear today?
Which I think is a really nice question
because it's quite open ended.
So it's a good like start to a conversation
and it's not just like where do you work?
Which could have a one-word answer.
And so, yeah, having that like saved up
in the back of my mind as my thing I can pull out
if I can't think of anything else to say,
or if, I don't know, I couldn't think of
a topic to discuss from the talk,
it's a good one just to have there,
ready to pull out when you need it.
Another situation that introverts can find really tough
is presenting, whether it's a talk at a conference
or just like to a small group of your team members
showing your work, it can be really difficult.
Myself and many other introverts
do not like being the center of attention.
We're not the type of people that you would call
the life of the party,
and yet I'm speaking at conferences,
I'm hosting workshops, and making these YouTube videos.
How I deal with this and how I get through it
is thinking about my end goal.
So as an INFJ, my personality type,
one of the things that really drives us
is helping people and getting to the root of the problem.
That's something I really connect with
about this description of my personality.
And I know that by getting up on stage and facing my fear
and like putting myself out there and giving this talk,
I'm gonna be sharing advice
that I think is gonna help people.
And even if it only helps one other person
by me getting up there then that makes it worth it for me.
So keeping that goal in mind helps me kind of push through.
Public speaking for me is kind of like when I'm networking.
I know that I'm gonna be uncomfortable,
but I'm just gonna decide to spend my energy on it
and I'm gonna do it.
When I say this though,
when I say you have to push through it,
I don't want you to feel like you have to
become a different person in order to do this.
I think it's about embracing your personality.
Like maybe you're really, really quiet and shy,
but when someone gets to know you that's when you open up
and maybe you'll tell little jokes
or like be super sarcastic or something like that.
For me when I'm giving a conference talk,
I just try and pretend that I know everyone
in the audience already and that I want to act like
the person I am when I feel like I'm being myself.
It's really hard to bring that out of you
when you're feeling unconfident and uncomfortable,
and I think it's definitely a skill
that you learn over time the more you do it,
the more you get used to it, you know?
So even though there is a little bit of
fake it 'til you make it involved in this,
you're not pretending to be someone you're not.
You're pretending to be the person who you are
when you're super comfortable.
And that is how it's gonna come across as natural
'cause it's still you, it's just not how you
would normally prefer to act in the situation.
I hope that makes sense and I hope this helps somewhat
that perhaps if you're an introvert
and you are struggling with things like networking
or having to present your work to a team
or something like that that some of these tips will
help you out and help you be
a bit more confident in doing so.
I really want you to embrace your introversion
and remember that you've got your own strengths
and that you don't have to become an extrovert
in order to succeed.
All right, thank you for watching this video.
I know it was a little bit different for me,
but I hope you enjoyed it nonetheless.
Give it a thumbs up if you did.
And if you want to talk to me more about this,
I am always down to talk about personality types.
So if you've done the 16 Personalities test
or any of those Myers-Briggs,
please tell me what your personality type
is down below in the comments.
And if you haven't yet, then go and do it
and then come back and share it and let's
chat about it down there.
All right, if you're not subscribed to this channel yet,
I make new videos about design and creativity
or in this case, just working in general,
I guess could be the topic for this video,
but I make videos every weekend.
So hit subscribe if you want to see more of them.
And I will see you in the next one.
Bye.
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