are you feeling unworthy of love stay
tuned
this is Damon Cart from NLP Gym how
to love yourself
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Okay I lied. I can't teach you how to love
yourself why because that's just an idea
that is not true you never stopped
loving yourself that's just an idea that
you picked up from someone and you can
drop it just as easily as you picked it
up if there is such a thing as love and
I do believe that there is you never
stop loving yourself you love yourself
even if you don't know it not loving
yourself or this idea of not loving
yourself just means that you don't feel
whole you feel somehow incomplete or
that something is missing but of course
you are a human being and it's when you
feel that wholeness that you you feel
loved oneness is that love that
you feel with someone else when you're
in love with someone or you feel love
for someone that could be your kids, that
could be your parents that oneness with
them
that is love and then some people even
feel oneness with the world and that's
one of those more enlightened states and
that is when you actually feel that
wholeness with the world because you
don't experience separation the lack of
love for yourself are not feeling love
for yourself is basically you divided
it's the illusion of separation between
parts within yourself that gives you
this feeling of not being loved NLP
actually offers a lot of processes on
dealing with this and there are some
simple solutions and
give you one in this video first of all
understand that you do love yourself you
cannot not love yourself
the feeling of not loving yourself must
mean that you know what it's like to
then love yourself because to think that
you don't love yourself to feel like you
don't love yourself you can't know that
unless you compare that to having loved
yourself or the feeling of loving
yourself
so how do you know you don't love
yourself what what is that like what you
see, what you hear, what do you feel in your
internal experience that let you know
that you don't love yourself? and then is
there something externally that you
interpret as you not loving yourself
as in has someone told you you must
not love yourself if someone has told
you that and that is what you believe
based on what someone else told you what
qualifications do they have to make such
a judgment about your own internal
experience I've heard this a lot of
people come to me sometimes they say
that their life coach told them or their
therapist told them that they don't love
themselves. I think that's a pretty awful
thing to say to someone and the
therapist or the coach probably said
that with good intent so I don't want to
demonize the coach or the
therapist for saying that because they
probably meant well but I think what
happened as they introduced a very
limited idea to that person or to you
where this might originate from and where it
originates for a lot of people is in
childhood and in childhood there was
likely an adult
perhaps your parent but not necessarily
just and usually someone older
communicated to you that you were
unworthy of love or that love is
conditional or that you have to earn
love in order to have love to keep love
and they might not have articulated in
those exact words they could have done
it in another way such as you wanting
something from them or wanting to
receive love from them or want some
attention from them and they put a
condition on their attention and at the
time a lot of a lot of children actually
and some adult still do this, confuse
attention and love and at the time as a
child you might have confused the
attention love and also the person
communicating this message was probably
coming from a very limited place their
limited communication coming from a very
limited place was likely the origin of
this idea that you don't love yourself
get in touch with this feeling of not
being loved
where does it actually occur in your
body once you know where that is get a
sense of it and then trace it back to
its origin and the strange thing is that
sometimes this can actually go back to a time
when you didn't even know how to speak
when you didn't have the cognitive
ability to articulate a concept like
love
it's amazing sometimes how far this will
go back and it's, did it actually
happen or not is completely
irrelevant this is part of your
experience this is what's happening
inside of you and this is how you're
making sense of it so go back to the
origin of it and find out who
communicated this to you
where did this start and once you have
that look at the person who's
communicating this to you and again it
doesn't have to even be in words they
could have communicated to you through
touch so once you have this person in
front of you imagine this person in
front of you tell them to shut down a
dialogue with them and then tell them
that you picked up this idea from
them and that you don't want it anymore
and actually hand it back to them
give yourself some sort of symbolic way
in which you can give this idea back to
them and tell them you don't want
anymore you're done it was never yours
to begin with and let it go I've done this
a number of times for a number of bad
ideas that i picked up from people when i
was a kid and one time I was having this
dialogue with this imaginary person and
telling them that there was a particular
idea that I was
burdened by and I didn't want it anymore
and here i'm giving it back to you. The
funny thing was this that person didn't
want it anymore either and didn't
believe in that idea so they didn't want
it back which was interesting and what I
did was at that point is I just dropped
it on the ground like a sack of rotten
potatoes and just said ok I don't care
if you don't want it anymore you don't
want back
I'm not taking it anymore i'm not going
to be burdened by this anymore and like
I said I just dropped it on the ground
and then walked away in my imagination but
that unburdened me I didn't feel like I
don't feel like I carry this idea around
anymore which is an amazing thing is
amazing what the mind does symbolically
when you drop things when you drop false
ideas like not loving
yourself just let it go and drop it on
the ground like a sack of rotten
potatoes in other words the person
doesn't have to take the idea back when
you give it back to them
the main thing is to unburden yourself
of this idea let it go drop it on the
ground like a sack of rotten potatoes
you don't want this idea anymore it was
never yours to begin with this idea that
you don't love yourself is just not true
drop it like any other bad idea and let
it go
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