Hey there it's clay with modern love.life. Uh, once again, I'm out here walking in the forest,
thought I'd take a little bit of a hike and, uh, just do some walk and talk videos here with you.
Uh, in this video, we're going to be talking about why your ex is blowing
Hot and cold. This can be really confusing for really a lot of people. Um, you
Know, your ex comes forward and says something like, oh, Hey, I miss you,
uh, was big mistake to break up. We should definitely get back together.
Things like that. And then maybe the next day, they'll take it all back and say,
you know, Hey, it's, it's probably for the best that we're broken up. We should just be friends.
We should date other people, things like that. This is super common. Oftentimes it causes
people to think things like their ex is playing mind games or using them or things like that.
But that's usually very rare, very uncommon. It is possible that your ex might be playing mind games,
but, um, most, most people out there are just genuine, decent people who are just trying to
Do their best to, um, get Through a confusing situation in life.
And they're not intentionally trying to use you or manipulate you or anything like that.
They're just genuinely confused themselves. And so
May cause them to do certain things one day and do the opposite the next day. Of course,
it is possible that they might be playing mind games or using you. I'm not gonna rule that out,
but, uh, it's, it's a much less likely scenario and you probably would know if they had it in
them to play mind games if they had it in them to use you or take advantage of you, right? Because
obviously you were together with them. You probably know their personality way more than,
than anyone else out there, to be honest with you. But usually it's because of a genuine sense
of confusion. And, um, oftentimes this confusion is, is based off of the fact that the two of you
don't really have a clear way of fitting into each other's lives after a breakup. You know, like we
talked about in the previous video, um, we don't really have a very clear way to fit into someone
else's life after a breakup in most cases. Um, and so it causes a lot of people to hold
themselves back and to play it safe and to just be extra conservative because they don't wanna
send the wrong message. They don't want to think of themselves as a bad person.
Who's a string, someone along, et cetera. But when they do actually let themselves surrender
to those positive emotions, it can cause them to have some of this hot and cold behavior here. Um,
and so what we want to do is we actually want to give them a clear path for connecting with
us a clear path for interacting with us in a, in a totally cooperative way,
which is where the whole same team conversation comes into play.
You know, you want to just be able to make it clear and obvious that the two of you
can get along in a totally friendly way without a hidden agenda, without any
added pressure and all that sort of stuff. Because obviously that's just going to put added
pressure, which is just going to keep them locked in this, uh, paralysis for lack of a better word.
You know, if they feel like they have to have it all figured out before they choose,
if the two of you are going to get back together or not, they're probably going to, uh,
take a long time, especially if there isn't an emotional connection in place
that's strong enough to really justify, um, the two of you getting back together currently.
So you need to drop the pressure so that they can give themselves permission to spend more time with
you. And then the more time they spend with you, the stronger that emotional connection becomes
and the stronger that connection becomes, the, the more likely they are to want to actually, um,
get back together with you, see a future with you, all that good stuff.
So Again, your ex is probably doing this
because they're genuinely confused, not because they're trying to string you along.
Use you, keep you as a plan B in case, you know, dating someone else doesn't work out
again. I'm not going to rule that out. That is totally possible, but, um, uh, most of
the time it's, it's just them being genuinely confused. I also wanted to let you know that,
uh, we've gotten a lot of, so like many people, well have, uh, had conversations over the past
few months with either me or Shantelle on our team about coaching. And, um, you know,
we've gotten some people into our commit coaching program and we've been working with them and have
been having a great time with all that stuff. And it's been honestly an awesome experience. Um,
however, they're, they're having a lot of awesome people that we've talked to that just
are not in a place where they can afford coaching. Um, and w I've heard that a lot of people really
do want some sort of more affordable coaching options out there. So we actually are starting up,
you know, when you sign up with one of our courses or programs, you can select to get, uh,
three coaching calls With the course.
If you want to, you'll have one coaching call with a coach, Fiona on our team, one coaching
call with coach Francis on our team and a one coaching call with me. This is to really help
people out. You know, I don't really like the whole, you know, one coaching call at a time,
you know, just, just pay us, you know, whatever, a couple hundred dollars and you get like
one coaching call for one hour. I don't like that because it feels a lot like, you know,
like a one night stand kind of thing. And maybe it's corny joke for relationship experts here,
but you know, I'm into long-term relationships because, you know, we actually do get involved
in your stories. We actually do want to know how it turns out in the end. It's not just a matter of
like, okay, let's, let's talk for an hour. All right, goodbye. You know, I want to know,
did you ever work it out? Like what happened next to the two of you ever get married? The two of you
ever do that thing that you said you were going to do? Uh, we're starting this out with, with ESP
currently though. I think pretty soon we're going to be rolling it out to all of our courses, but,
um, yeah, if you, if you've been wanting to work with us and you want to get some extra
personalized coaching, uh, you know, go check out X solution program, and when you sign up,
you know, you'll, you'll get the X solution program course, obviously, but you can also
select to get the three coaching calls as well, too. Um, and that can be really super helpful
for a lot of people. So anyway, um, the link for that, at least with ESP is right down below.
And, um, you know, if you're not watching this at the time I upload it, but you're watching it,
you know, maybe a few weeks later, um, you can probably do this with any of our other
courses as well, too, but anyway, um, I thought I'd let you know about that.
If that sounds like it's something that you would want to do, uh, please feel free to check it out,
please feel free to try that out. And, um, I can't wait to talk to you and hear about your successes.
Uh, we're here at the end of a path. And I don't know if you can see, see the, the mountains there
in the distance or not. It doesn't look like you, you can, from the little screen that I have,
but maybe you can, I'll be able to tell when I get back in and take a look at this video,
but anyway, um, yeah, I hope you like these walk and talk videos. I hope you like the
new coaching options that we're giving for people in our courses.
And, um, um, yeah, if you liked this video, if you like what we're doing on this channel,
please remember to hit that thumbs up button so that you can help us out with
YouTube algorithm. And with that being said, please take care and I'll talk to you then.