So, I don't know about you,
but I used to dread going to meetings because I always felt like I didn't really
have that much value to add to the meeting,
or I was afraid that I would mumble everything I said to the point that it would
sound so ridiculous. Hey, there, welcome to Mak TV. My name is Mak,
and this is a space for first time people managers who are looking to build
their confidence as well as their skills so that they can lead their teams
effectively.
So I have been meaning to do a video like this in terms of how you can speak up
in meetings for quite some time,
because I know it is a huge pain point for a lot of you in my audience out here.
And so I'm super excited to be like diving into this topic today.
So for today's video,
we're actually gonna like consider the entire subject matter in three chunks.
So we're going to talk about what you should do before the meeting.
What you should do during the meeting and then what you should do after the
meeting. Okay. So let's dive into this. Okay so first things first,
we're going to talk about what you should be doing ahead of time.
So one of the first things you need to do is get prepared. Now,
if you've been following me for some time,
then you have probably heard me mentioned numerous times how important it is for
you to be prepared. And I mean,
I'm such a huge advocate of being prepared because I know for me,
it has saved me a lot.
Like it has saved me a lot of hassle of being like anxious and stressed.
And I know that it'll do the same thing for you,
which is why I'm constantly preaching that it's really important for you to be
prepared. So for example,
something that I suggest to like a lot of my clients that have like this issue
of speaking up confidently in meetings is that I ask them to ask for an agenda
ahead of time. So if you know that you need to participate in a meeting,
that's going to be held maybe on a Thursday afternoon.
Maybe on the Monday or Tuesday,
you can ask the person who is like scheduling the meeting or hosting the meeting
to send you an agenda. That way you can look through the agenda,
look through the topics that are going to be discussed so that you can just
focus your mind or get prepared in terms of what to expect during
that hour or two that you're going to be in that meeting.
That way too you can think through like what kind of value you can add to
that meeting rather than having to think on the fly and think in terms of what
you can say on the fly, right?
Which usually makes people feel more flustered and more nervous.
And so they don't speak up.
But if you ask for an agenda ahead of time and just get yourself in that mental
space of, okay, so what is it that we're going to be focusing on then you're,
you can start like thinking through like,
what are the things that I can talk about?
What are the relevant things that might be useful in this meeting?
Okay so this brings me to my second point,
which is something that I really need you to hear the value that you bring to
the table isn't necessarily going to look the exact same as somebody else's
value. And I'll explain what I mean to you in a second.
I think that a lot of people feel that in order to add value or to speak up in
the meeting, that they have to say something like super insightful.
And if they don't have something super insightful to say that they might as well
just not speak up at all, but that's not necessarily true.
You can still add value by even just asking a question.
Even a clarifying question is adding value.
And let me just give you an example of what I mean.
So I actually worked on a team where there was someone on the team who,
who was like really good at like throwing out provocative statements that like,
that was his thing.
And I think maybe like a lot of people found him to be a little bit abrasive
because of this. But I didn't,
I loved it because it often got me thinking differently.
Like his provocative statement would like trigger something in my head and I'd
be like, oh yeah, I wonder if we did it this way, how that would change things.
And all of a sudden then I can add something. Right?
All because he added value by throwing out his provocative statement.
So do you see how, like, it's all it's different for each and every person,
depending on what they're bringing to the table and it doesn't all have to look
the same.
So don't feel like you have to say something that's like super cool sounding or
like life-changing in order to add value.
Sometimes it's just something very simple that adds value.
Or maybe it's even asking like a clarifying question that somebody else at the
boardroom table was nervous about asking.
Now you've asked on behalf of that person.
So never underestimate the value of what it is you're thinking.
And then obviously saying it out loud.
The third thing you want to do is make sure that you're dressed for it. I mean,
the way that you're dressed definitely affects the way that you show up the way
that you feel as well as the way that you are perceived. As human beings
we're very visual and we definitely draw conclusions based on what we see.
And so if you go to the meeting put together,
then that definitely has an effect on the way that you are viewed by others
around that board table.
And so just set aside some time to make sure that you've picked like a specific
outfit that looks good and put together or tailored or whatever,
so that when you get to the meeting, you're perceived well.
If you don't take yourself seriously, then no one else will. Right.
So people who respect themselves are listened to.
So make sure that you are showing on the outside,
that you respect yourself by making sure that you're dressed well and put
together. Okay so now we're going to talk about during the meeting.
So I think the very first thing is that you should know yourself and then
participate based on that. So what I mean is like,
if you know that you are kind of a shy or anxious person and that you
probably will chicken out of talking the longer the meeting goes on,
then maybe you need to adjust and make sure that you speak right at the
beginning of the meeting so that you can just like chill and listen for the rest
of the meeting. Right?
So you're adjusting based on what your personality style is. Um,
the second thing I want to talk about is interruptions.
So I'm actually very fortunate.
I've never worked at a place where I was in a meeting and people were
interrupting me constantly.
But I do know that this is like a huge pain point for a lot of you,
especially for my female leaders out there where people are constantly
interrupting you.
And the one thing I'll say about this is that it's really important that you
take the conversation back, right?
Like let that person know that you weren't finished speaking and take back
control of the conversation.
Now I know that I'm talking to some of you who are people pleasers out there ,
and that you might feel uncomfortable doing this,
that you might fear that you're coming off as a beotch by simply saying,
you know, Hey, I wasn't finished talking, but I got to tell you the truth.
You are not coming off like mean or like a beotch for lack of a better
term, by taking back control of the conversation,
because the truth is that you were actually speaking and that you were saying
something, so it's actually rude of them to be interrupting you. So it's okay.
Um, to take it back.
And you're probably just a little bit sensitive to the way that, you know,
you're being perceived, because like I said,
the truth is that you were interrupted and it is completely your stage to
continue what you were saying. So do not feel bad about this at all.
My next tip is to not apologize or downplay what you're
about to say. Now I used to be super guilty of this, right?
Where I would just like preface what I was about to say by saying, well, I,
you know, I'm not sure if this is right or I'm not sure if, um,
what you guys would think about this before I would say something.
And I think it's because I was uncomfortable to be quite honest.
I knew I was sitting in rooms where I was the youngest or with people whose
years of experience added up to more than, you know, my age.
And so I felt uncomfortable talking about my opinions and thoughts and my ideas.
So I would always like preface what I was about to say.
But that was really bad because I was literally casting doubt on what I
was about to say, it's called negativity bias, right?
When you say something negative, and then you say what you have to say,
and that person only hears really that negative sentence that you used.
So don't fall into this trap,
make sure that you're just stating what you have to say and use lead in
sentences to help you. Instead of saying, I just say, here's my idea,
or these are my thoughts, or I don't necessarily agree.
And this is my reason why. Just state what you have to say,
because what you have to say is super valuable and they should hear it without
hearing the negative, like thing that you say ahead of time.
The next tip is to try and use gestures when you speak.
Because when you use gestures,
you're basically adding body and clarity to what you're saying. We,
people who use nonverbal communication in their favor are easily understood.
And I mean, that's the whole point, right?
To be clearly understood to get your point across.
So try and take advantage of the different communication tools that you have in
your arsenal to make sure that you're able to get your point across.
The other thing you want to do is to just try and take notes because staying
focused and present will actually help you to better participate.
It's so easy to get distracted, right by the phone or notifications,
or somebody doing something ridiculous at the table. But if you,
if you're focused and you, you take notes,
then it actually helps you to stay present.
And you'll be surprised at what your brain will pick up on based on what you're
like taking notes on. And then you'll all of a sudden start thinking, you know,
a little bit differently or know exactly what you want to comment on.
So it's super important to take notes and stay focused.
Okay so I have one final thought that I want to talk to you about for after the
meeting. So after the meeting,
it's important that you not overanalyze everything that happened,
whether you spoke up or not,
or didn't speak up enough or not just don't beat up on yourself about it.
I mean, beating up on yourself is not going to do anybody any good.
And so there's no point in doing that.
Thinking about every perceived wrong that you might've done in that meeting room
is just not helpful to you. And honestly, at the end of the day, it,
the meeting a purpose and that purpose isn't necessarily about you.
And I mean then in the kindest way as possible.
Like nobody's going to be judging you because you didn't speak up that much.
You know, they they're trying to, um, achieve a set purpose.
So as long as you're like focusing on the purpose then you did your job,
you will get better at this.
Speaking up in a meeting is not something that we're just naturally good at.
It comes with practice.
And if you try and apply all these steps or all these suggestions that I
mentioned in this video, I know that over time you will get it.
It just takes a little bit of time. So you gotta be patient with yourself.
Alright. That's pretty much it for this week's video.
I hope you found it valuable.
Don't forget to hit on the like and subscribe button.
So you don't miss out on any other content I share on this platform every single
Tuesday, it was great to be with you.
I hope you have a fantastic rest of the week friends,
and I'll see you in the next one.