This is not hyperbole.
You make it possible.
You make it possible
for ordinary citizens
to question authority.
And yes, even the laughing autho
without fear, intimidation.
That's what makes this nation st
So tonight,
let us show ourselves in the wor
our strength,
not just by the example of our p
but by the power of our example.
Folks,
I know a lot of change in the pr
and a lot of conversations, a lo
This is not your father's press
from 20 years ago.
No, I'm serious.
You all know it better. Than I d
But still,
it is
absolutely consequential and ess
After all,
I believe in the First Amendment
not just because my good friend
Madison wrote it
A lot of ways
this dinner sums up my
first two years in office.
I'll talk for 10 minutes,
take zero questions, and cheerfu
walk away.
Yeah, I know.
I just announced my reelection c
Some of you
some of your scoop
that I announced in the video.
Really?
You really all thought in your h
And I just blurted out, didn't y
try
and laugh?
I get
that age is completely reasonabl
So in everybody's mind,
and everyone by everyone
I mean The New York Times
headline
Biden's Advance Days The Big Iss
Trump's, however, is not
So that was a New York Times pie
But I apologize
I love that guy.
I should do an interview with hi
You might think I don't like
Rupert Murdoch.
That's simply not true.
How could I just like a guy
who makes me look like Harry Sty
Call me old
I call it being seasoned
You say mention.
I say eyes
the same over the hill.
Don Lemon would say that's a man
in his prime
Folks, it's
wonderful to be back here again.
Proving I haven't learned a damn
I want everybody to have fun ton
But please be safe
if you find yourself
disoriented or confused.
Either you're drunk
or Marjorie Taylor Greene,
can
thank you for hosting us.
I love NPR.
Because they whisper in the mic
like I do
But not everyone loves NPR.
Elon Musk
tweeted that it should be defund
Well, the best way to make NPR g
is rely Musk to buy it.
And that's more true
than you think anyway.
This dinner is one of the two
great traditions in Washington.
The other one is underestimating
Kamala
Well.
Well, the truth is,
we really have a record to be pr
Vaccinates the nation
transform the economy
earned historic legislative vict
and midterm results.
But the job isn't finished.
I mean, it is for these
for Tucker Carlson.
What are you doing about like th
Why do you think that's not reas
Give me a break.
Look, like I often say,
don't compare me to the almighty
Compare me the alternative
We added 12 million jobs.
That's just counting.
The lawyers defended the preside
at Ron DeSantis.
I had a lot of Ron DeSantis joke
for baking,
but Mickey Mouse beat the hell o
Got their first
hello
Can't be too rough on the guy.
After his reelection as governor
he was asked if he had a mandate
He said Hell no. I'm straight
and straight.
I'll give you time to think.
That went through
You got it.
Look, y'all keep reporting.
My approval ratings is 42%
But what?
I think you don't know this.
Kevin McCarthy called me
and asked me, Joe,
what the hell is your secret?
I'm not kidding
about that one.
The speaker's trying to claim
a big win this week,
but the last time Republicans
voted on something, this that ha
it took 15 tries
that was good.
Luck.
It's great.
The cable news networks are here
MSNBC, owned by NBC Universal
Fox News, owned by Dominion
Voting Systems,
last year.
Your favorite Fox News reporters
able to attend
because they were fully
vaccinated and boosted
this year.
Well that $787 million settlemen
They're here because they couldn
say no to a free meal.
And how
I'd call Fox honest, fair and tr
But then I could be sued for def
and nothing could can they do to
Look,
I hope the Fox News team
finds this funny.
My goal is to make them
laugh as hard as CNN did
when I read the settlement
But then again, CNN was like, wo
they actually have $787 million
Whoa!