I had on the subject of our podcast
kind of a fun experience,
which is a couple days ago,
I went and visited my in-laws
up on Bainbridge island in Seattle.
So went to Seattle,
and then you get on a ferry,
and you go over to Bainbridge Island,
and there was a gathering there.
And I attended with my wife and kids,
and we had a lovely time.
And then you drive back the other direction
and you get back on the ferry
to go back to Seattle and we're waiting in line,
and I get out to kind of just stretch my legs,
and cause we're waiting on the ferry
and sitting in our car, our cramped rental car.
Nice dig.
I'm sorry. It was, it was a little,
you know what it was?
It's a perfect, I'm not going to name the car.
It was a perfectly fine car.
But I, as you know, I have freakishly long legs.
Yeah. Right.
And not the most generous interior on this car.
Hmm.
It's very hard to rent a Bugatti, and
Oh, Jesus.
Wow.
This was an American car
that was a little cramped up front.
And so I get out and I'm stretching my legs,
and these people in the car next to me recognize me.
And they're very excited, which is nice.
And their windows are down and they go, this is so weird.
And I said, what?
And they said,
"We listen to the podcast on this commute
back and forth to Bainbridge Island all the time.
And here you are."
And you know, as path leaning into their car
invading their space.
Sounds like it
Cause I'm a needy person.
And I really wanted to get my head all in their car,
and be like, oh, how are you?
(Co- host laughs)
You Nixoned them?
I Nixoned them.
I gave them the old Nixon.
That's Nixon, motor boating woman.
(Conan motorboats)
I am not a crook.
I could have gone my whole without that.
I hadn't lived until I heard that
So, that, I can't.
I leaned, you know,
I'm talking to them and it just was so funny
because it just tickled my fancy
that here are people who, they do this commute a lot.
And can you imagine if you commute every day
and you like this podcast, so you're listening to it,
and it's part of your regular diet.
And the next thing you know,
I'm sticking my head in your window.
It's like, they summoned you.
Yes, exactly.
It was like The Conjuring.
And so it got me thinking that I should make it.
I wanna pledge to people out there who listen
to this on a commute, there's a decent chance
you will encounter me while you're in your car,
and I will stick my head in the window.
The more you listen, the more that is likely.
Yes, and it'll be kind of like,
you know when you hear sometimes
about someone who hits a deer with their car,
and the deer gets partially through the windshield,
and then the deer starts thrashing.
That's me.
If I know you've been listening to the podcast
and I encounter you, and I stick my head in,
I may become wild and start thrashing.
Oh man.
Yeah, and then you've got to just
put me out of my misery as quickly as possible.
Do you ever get upset that people mention the podcast,
but don't mention that 28 years you were on television?
You know, what's so funny? I don't.
Really?
Yeah. You'd think I would.
I think if someone went way out of their way to say,
"I love this podcast, what were you doing before?"
That would.
Well, it means they keeping up with you.
That's a good thing
But I'm telling you, I have, you know,
it doesn't happen a lot,
but there are still times when I encounter someone
and they go like,
"Oh my God, Conan O'Brien.
You are, I just love what you did
on The Simpsons." And I'll say, oh, that's great.
And they sometimes almost look like they don't
know what happened after that.
Yeah, so I'm happy if anyone likes anything I did.
If someone says that that crocheted pot holder you made
for Mrs. Gaines in the fifth grade was just killer.
I'll take it.
So I'm just happy that people like it,
but it did get me interested in oh right,
A lot of people listen to podcast while they're commuting.
Yes.
And I just want you to know if you're commuting right now.
Or if you're in your car and you're listening,
Look in your backseat,
Look in the backseat.
And I wanna say there's an 11% chance
I will rise up behind you.
You'll see me in the rear view mirror.
Oh God.
And I'll give you the old Nixon motorboat.
Oh no!
(Conan motorboats)
Come here, Pat.
Oh, no, Dick, no!
(motorboating sounds)
Now give me those boobies there.
(motorboating sounds)
Hadelman, Ehrlichman, get in here.
(motorboating sounds)
(co-hosts laugh)
He's motorboating those guys too?
No, he wants them to watch.
He wants Hadelman and Ehrlichman
to watch him motorboat Pat.
This is what was on the missing portion
of the Watergate tapes.
Yeah. Yeah, exactly.
He wasn't worried about being caught.
Just his decency.
When they suspected him of having his assistant,
Rosemary Woods, delete the crucial 18 minutes.
It wasn't it wasn't him worried about being caught,
orchestrating the break in or the cover up of the Watergate.
It was the 18 minutes of him Motorboating Pat.
(Conan motorboats)
And more so, cause he had a method
that he didn't want to get out there.
You know what I mean?
No one must know, I have a secret method
with ladies to drive them crazy.
No one must know my motorboating.
How about the old five o'clock shadow?
Grow out.
Oh, no!
A little friction there.
No!
Get the old peace signs in the air.
(Conan motorboats)
(Co-hosts laugh)
Five o'clock shadow.
It's just gonna hurt.
No, just if you grow it out just a little bit.
It's an exfoliant.
Yeah, it's an exfoliant.
Come here.
You lose your loofah?
Come here and take off your top.
Please, Mr. President.
If you don't have a loofah, take off your top.
I'm going to give you the breasts of a 20 year old.
I'm going to loofah you up real good.
Give her the old Dick Nixon motorboat.
(Conan motorboats)
No Checkers, don't go in there!