- Hello.
- I'm Matthew.
- Is it wrong to say
Matthew is a really gay name?
(laughing)
- Hi!
- Oh, I am affectionately known
as L.L. Royal.
- I'm me. I like what I like when I like it.
I prefer women, I do,
but I am not opposed to giving
an entity with a penis an opportunity.
- Oh, wonderful.
- I'm probably going to suck,
but it's going to be a lot of fun
watching me go down.
- How's it going?
- Sometimes you can see,
a sorta gay face, straight face.
- Do I have a gay face?
- I can see things.
- What do you see?
- Metro screams from you.
Like you're very clean, you're very neat.
Okay, so let's talk porn.
- Okay.
- What kind of skin to skin do you like?
You like the humping,
you like insertion?
You like things going in multiple holes?
- Yeah.
Like basically doggy style, if that works.
- Doggy style is nice.
It's aggressive.
- Yeah.
(growling)
- Yeah, I'm thinking he's bi.
- I'm gay.
Does that surprise you at all?
- No.
- No?
- You strike me as an individual
that does not go along with stereotypes,
and I can respect and appreciate that a lot.
I don't want to just come straight out
and be like, dude, you're not straight,
but I'm like, nah.
- What about me like, gives off like, you know,
not straight vibes, off the bat?
- You're very neat, you're very tucked.
I'm not saying all straights are basic,
you know, but you just have this flare.
What's your favorite sex position?
- Ooh, missionary.
- Are you more like a romantic?
You like being in a relationship?
- I'm a hopeless romantic.
Like I'm always, I'm constantly
searching for love.
- Yeah, you're not straight.
- I am bisexual.
You're correct, I'm not straight.
Before, I would present myself
as like pansexual more, but like now
I'm starting to prefer to the term
like bisexual or queer.
I'm attracted to more than one gender.
Like I get a lot of women,
but I also date a lot of people
that are non-binary.
I find myself attracted to, like, men.
- I mean, me personally,
I'm not going to say I'm a bisexual.
I don't like any term.
I like what I like when I fucking like it.
That's it.
- I don't need to prove anything to anyone.
- You know, you and I are one and the same.
- Hi!
- Hi, I'm Kathleen.
- You are beautiful.
- Thank you so much.
- I'm really trying not to be pervy,
so I'm gonna try to keep myself together.
I kind of figured that she was straight
from the moment she walked in,
just because I could be attracted to her.
- I am, and that's stupid.
- Aww, that's hard.
(laughing)
- Oh, boy.
Yeah, I find her beautiful.
She's straight.
- Why? What makes it?
- It's the first impression.
I thought you were absolutely beautiful.
I couldn't stop looking at your ass.
I apologize, I'm not trying to be a pervert.
- I know.
I got that double bump humper dumper.
(both laughing)
- I am asexual.
- Asexual.
- I'm ace.
- The fuck is that?
- It's where someone doesn't experience
sexual attraction for another person,
that my mind never goes to sex.
- Wow.
- I don't think of people like that.
- Interesting.
Is it possible to be straight and also asexual?
- Yeah.
I'm heteroromantic.
I just don't see sex in my mind.
- So, I appreciate the education.
Thank you.
Oh, y'all love to see me blush.
- Hiya.
- Hello, I'm L.L. Royal.
- I'm Matthew.
- Is it wrong to say Matthew
is a really gay name?
(Laughing)
What do you like to do?
- I'm a video game developer.
So I do that in my off-time as well as on my on-time
because that's just kind of person I am.
Also my favorite hobbies is wasting time
on the internet and sleeping.
- Okay.
(both laughing)
I would say, I have a thought already
when he walked in.
First impressions, I think you're very straight.
You just seem like the little, you know,
quiet guy that, you know,
grows up and is into the software development
and then gets the bad bitches,
because then you get, like, money and shit.
- I hope you're right.
(both laughing)
That sounds like a great life.
- You're straight.
- Yeah, I am.
- You are.
(laughing)
But it was lovely meeting you, Matthew.
- It was lovely to meet you, too.
- Even though you have a gay name,
that didn't fool me either.
- Hello.
- Hi.
What do you like to cook?
Not that, you know,
straight people have their own menu.
- I do mostly like, home cooking stuff.
Like, I make really good mac and cheese.
I make a good beef stroganoff.
I make good tacos, pico de gallo,
my own tortillas.
- I think you're straight.
Fuck, maybe there is a straight menu.
I have a lot of straight friends
that are females and like literally
cater to that dude, like cooking for him,
and bring them their plates, their slippers,
their fucking newspaper, their fucking coffee,
fucking remote.
- Yeah.
- Yeah, you scream that to me now.
(laughing)
Now, that's my decision.
You're straight.
You're definitely straight.
- Yes, and I'm exactly like what you just said.
- Yep, as soon as you started naming items.
It was incredible meeting you.
- Thank you.
- I'd love to see you again.
- It was great to meet you too.
Bye.
- Buh-bye.
Oh, you're so cute.
- What do you do for fun?
What do you like to do?
- I like to go rock climbing.
- Are you into sports?
I like my football, but I don't play it.
- Were you a good church boy?
- Was I a good church boy?
(laughing)
I actually was a youth leader.
- Did you do sinning while in church?
- While in church?
- Yeah, while at church.
It ain't no hornier placed than church,
unless you on a porn site.
- I've known people that watched porn in church.
- Hey, that's what I'm talking about.
Now I'm not guilty of that,
but did I get some fucking in on the premises
while the preacher was preaching?
You're God damn right I did.
- Okay, there we go.
(laughing)
- So what're you thinking?
- I think you are not straight.
- You sure?
- Yeah, I'm sure.
I don't think you're gay.
I just think you're not straight.
- So yeah, you're right.
I'm not straight, but I am gay.
- Ah, okay.
- I like the dick.
(clapping)
- So gay.
So not straight.
Have you seen a naked vagina before?
- Yes.
- You're not straight to me.
- I am straight.
- You scream not straight to me.
- I'm trans, so maybe that's why I seem queer.
- Do people normally think you're
queer or gay?
- Yes, they think I'm, yeah,
like a gay boy.
Prior to me being read as male,
people would just assume that I'm into girls.
But now that I'm being read as male,
then people will sort of like,
feel like I'm probably gay.
- Yeah.
- It's confusing.
- Yeah, society confuses me.
- Yeah.
- This was interesting.
- No.
I don't think that you need to broadcast
what society deems you should look like
because you are interested
in one sex or another.
You should just be you.
If that's your style, I mean as I saw,
there are some people that have
the gay swag that are not gay, you know.
And then there are some people
that have the straight swag
that are not straight.
So it doesn't really matter,
if that's your style, that's your style.
- Thank you for having me!
- Oh my gosh, this is great!
(clapping)