LAST TIME YOU WERE HERE IN THE FALL, YOU SAID YOU DON'T GIVE A
DAMN ABOUT DONALD TRUMP.
>> I DIDN'T.
>> Stephen: YOU DID NOT GIVE A DAMN ABOUT DONALD TRUMP.
>> WE WERE NOT IN THE ELECTION YEAR AT THAT POINT.
>> Stephen: BUT WE WERE ALREADY STILL --
>> WE WERE IN THE PROCESS -- LET ME HANDLE THIS FOR YOU.
(LAUGHTER) WERE WE IN THE PROCESS, JOHN?
YES, WE WERE.
WE WERE IN THE PROCESS.
>> Stephen: WE WERE IN THE PRIMARY PROCESS.
>> STILL NOT AT THAT POINT, NO.
>> Stephen: WELL, THE PRIMARY PROCESS, OR PROCESS AS WE SAY ON
THIS SIDE OF THE POND DR. .
>> WE INVENTED THE WORDS, WE'LL TELL YOU HOW THEY'RE SUPPOSED TO
SOUND.
(LAUGHTER) >> Stephen: THEY WERE STILL
CAMPAIGNING.
>> YES.
I DIDN'T CARE, AND I DIDN'T THINK I HAD TO CARE.
NO ONE THOUGHT WE WERE GOING TO BE HERE, BUT WE ARE.
>> Stephen: NOW YOU CARE A LOT.
YOU DID A WONDERFUL 20-MINUTE PIECE TWO WEEKS AGO --
(VOICE CRACKED) -- WITH TWO WEEKS AGO --
(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE) >> YES.
>> Stephen: TELL THE PEOPLE ABOUT THAT.
>> HERE'S WHAT WE DID ON OUR PIECE IF YOU DIDN'T SEE IT.
WE WERE TRYING TO SEPARATE THE KIND OF MASCOT DONALD TRUMP FROM
THE MAN, SO WE WANTED TO -- THE TRUMP NAME IS VERY POWERFUL,
WHAT HE EMBODIES IS POWERFUL.
>> Stephen: VERY LARGE ON BUILDINGS.
>> IT COULDN'T BE LARGER WHILE BEING SAFE.
SO WE WANTED TO SEPARATE THAT, TO FIND A DIVISION SO YOU COULD
LOOK AT HIM WITH FRESH EYES, AND HIS ANCESTORS WERE CALLED
DRUMPH.
>TAKE A NAP.
>> Stephen: THEY DON'T PAY ME IF I TAKE A NAP.
I'LL KEEP MY EYES OPEN.
>> THEY WERE DRUMPH.
>> Stephen: WHY WOULD YOU CHANGE YOUR NAME FROM THAT?
>> THE GERMAN LANGUAGE IS SO SUBTLE, ISN'T IT.
>> Stephen: BEAUTIFUL LANGUAGE, LANGUAGE OF POETRY,
ANGRY POETRY.
SO WE MADE HATS AND WE SOLD 35,000 OF THESE.
(APPLAUSE) >> Stephen: NOW, WHERE DOES
THAT MONEY GO?
>> WE SOLD IT AT A COST WHICH YOU MIGHT IMAGINE HBO FOUND
HILARIOUS.
WHAT'S MORE FUNNY THAN NOT MAKING MONEY ON AN INEXPLICABLE
HIT?
BUT JAY-Z'S PEOPLE CALLED HBO ASKING FOR A HAT.
I'LL TELL YOU THIS FOR STARTS, BUY THE HAT, JAY-Z.
>> Stephen: HE WANTED ONE FOR FREE?
>> HE WANTED ONE FOR FREE.
SPRING FOR A HAT, LET IT TRICKLE DOWN.
THAT'S HOW ECONOMICS WORKS, RIGHT?
>> Stephen: YOU GET THESE ON eBAY.
>> I SAID, OKAY, SEND HIM ONE.
THEY WERE ALREADY RUNNING OUT.
I DID SAY, BE CAREFUL, BECAUSE IF HE PUTS THAT ON HIS HEAD IN
PUBLIC, YOU'RE GOING TO NEED MORE HATS.
AND IF HIS WIFE PUTS IT ON IN PUBLIC, WE ARE NOT LONGER A TV
SHOW, WE'RE A HAT MANUFACTURING COMPANY.
>> Stephen: THAT'S TRUE.
YOU HAD TO BRING THAT.
>> I HAVEN'T SEEN ONE.
THIS IS THE FIRST TIME I'VE SEEN ONE.
YOU AND I PUTTING THIS ON OUR HEAD --
>> Stephen: DOES NOTHING.
PUT IT ON.
(LAUGHTER) >> I WILL AND WATCH THE SALES GO
DOWN.
LOOK.
IT'S OVER.
(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE) >> Stephen: THAT LIKELY LOWERS
YOUR INTELLIGENCE.
VERY NICE.
>> YOU'RE TELLING ME KIDS DON'T WANT THIS?
(LAUGHTER) >> Stephen: COULD TRUMP HAPPEN
IN ENGLAND?
COULD HE HAPPEN -- THIS KIND OF CANDIDACY IN ENGLAND --
>> IT COULD HAPPEN, IT HAS HAPPENED.
WE'VE HAD MANY KINGS IN THE PAST IN BRITISH HISTORY AND YOU SEE
LOTS OF DRUMPHs WEARING GOLD.
THERE IS AN EQUIVALENT WEARING OF GOLD BETWEEN 18th CENTURY
KINGS AND CURRENT PRESIDENTIAL CANDIDATES.
>> Stephen: BUT DONALD TRUMP HIMSELF IS GETTING 35% OF
PRIMARY VOTERS OF THE REPUBLICAN PARTY, SAY 40% OF AMERICANS
IDENTIFY AS REPUBLICAN, LESS THAN HALF VOTE IN THE PRIMARIES,
HE'S GETTING 35%, SO IT'S, LIKE, 12% OF THE ELECTORATE IS VOTING
FOR HIM.
>> THAT'S AN CREDIBLE MEANINGFUL 12%, THOUGH.
>> Stephen: BUT IN THE AMERICAN SYSTEM, THAT 12% IF HE
CAPTURES THE NOMINATION GETS 50% COME NOVEMBER TO GET YOU TO VOTE
FOR HIM.
>> YEAH.
>> Stephen: SO IT'S NOT AN IMPOSSIBLE IDEA THAT HE'S THE
NEXT PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES.
>> I THOUGHT WE WERE IN A POLYSCI CLASS JUST NOW.
>> Stephen: BUT THAT WOULDN'T HAPPEN IN A PARLIAMENTARY
SYSTEM, BECAUSE HE WOULD GET 12% THERE.
>> THAT'S WHY OUR CRAZY LEADERS WERE KINGS BECAUSE YOUR ONLY
QUALIFICATIONS IS YOU MAD TO COME OUT OF A QUEEN'S VAGINA.
(LAUGHTER) THE CRAZY THING IS, I DON'T KNOW
IF YOU HAVE TO BLEEP THAT, BUT YOU PROBABLY SHOULD.