ELLIE KEMPER: Wow! JIMMY KIMMEL: How are you doing?
ELLIE KEMPER: I've never been here before.
This is unbelievable.
JIMMY KIMMEL: You've never been to Brooklyn,
or you've never been to the BAM? ELLIE KEMPER: To the BAM.
JIMMY KIMMEL: I see.
ELLIE KEMPER: I have been to Brooklyn.
Yeah.
JIMMY KIMMEL: You look fantastic.
ELLIE KEMPER: Thank you.
JIMMY KIMMEL: You just had a baby last month.
This is ridiculous.
ELLIE KEMPER: Well, I'm wearing [INAUDIBLE]..
[CHEERING]
Thank you!
I did it!
I'm the first one in the history of the world.
No.
JIMMY KIMMEL: Was it a tiny little baby
or a normal-sized baby?
ELLIE KEMPER: A normal-sized baby.
JIMMY KIMMEL: Wow.
ELLIE KEMPER: And this is my second baby.
And it was much easier this time.
So thank goodness for that.
And, yes, his name's Matthew. And he's--
JIMMY KIMMEL: Matthew, nice. ELLIE KEMPER: And he's an angel.
JIMMY KIMMEL: Classic. ELLIE KEMPER: Yeah.
He's so sweet. Very classic.
JIMMY KIMMEL: Classic.
ELLIE KEMPER: Yup.
My older son is James.
So [INAUDIBLE].
JIMMY KIMMEL: Oh, you got a Matthew and a James.
ELLIE KEMPER: Yeah.
JIMMY KIMMEL: It's very biblical going on there.
ELLIE KEMPER: Yeah, oh, yeah. JIMMY KIMMEL: Yeah.
And how's your older son, James, enjoying Matthew?
ELLIE KEMPER: OK.
So everyone warned me, of course,
like you need to shower the older one with like attention.
And you don't want them to feel left out.
JIMMY KIMMEL: That's what they say.
Yeah. ELLIE KEMPER: Yes.
I don't know if you did the same thing.
JIMMY KIMMEL: Yeah, I guess so. ELLIE KEMPER: Yeah?
JIMMY KIMMEL: My daughter just-- she just demands it.
It's just not-- ELLIE KEMPER: OK.
Good. JIMMY KIMMEL: --even like--
ELLIE KEMPER: It's not a question.
JIMMY KIMMEL: Yeah, right. ELLIE KEMPER: [INAUDIBLE] yeah.
I am going overboard.
I am like so worried about James feeling left out,
that I find myself like insulting the baby--
[LAUGHTER]
--to like win James's approval.
I'm like, Matthew is a baby.
He's dumb.
It's so mean to the baby.
The baby is like seven weeks old.
He's like gaaaa.
And I'm like, you know, James, Matthew
can't do what you can do.
Because he's an idiot.
It's so mean!
I love you, Matthew.
But you're a little dumb. JIMMY KIMMEL: Wow.
That will be interesting to see how that kind of
manifests itself [INAUDIBLE]. ELLIE KEMPER: I know.
Because I think I'm like so--
James knows what I'm saying.
And I'm a people pleaser. JIMMY KIMMEL: Yeah.
ELLIE KEMPER: So I'm like, Matthew
will never remember that I said this, but James will.
JIMMY KIMMEL: Do you feel guilty at all
that you had a second baby after your first beautiful prized
baby was born, and now you have to split the attention?
ELLIE KEMPER: It's a complicated thing.
I mean, I will answer you honestly.
It feels so strange.
Someone made this comparison to me.
It's like you have the love of your life.
And then one day, you just bring home someone.
You're like, oh, by the way, this other person
will be joining us, too. JIMMY KIMMEL: Yeah.
ELLIE KEMPER: It's complicated.
JIMMY KIMMEL: It's like "The Bachelor," really, in a way.
ELLIE KEMPER: Yes!
[LAUGHTER] It is.
JIMMY KIMMEL: You're from St. Louis.
ELLIE KEMPER: Yeah.
JIMMY KIMMEL: My wife is from St. Louis.
And you live in New York.
This is where you've chosen to live.
In fact, when you did "The Office," you moved out to LA.
You moved right back to New York as soon as it was over.
ELLIE KEMPER: Yeah.
JIMMY KIMMEL: But St. Louis and New York are
very, very different places. ELLIE KEMPER: Yes.
And you know this, as well.
You go to St. Louis a lot.
JIMMY KIMMEL: People are different.
ELLIE KEMPER: People, they're very friendly there.
They're very wholesome. JIMMY KIMMEL: In St. Louis.
ELLIE KEMPER: In St. Louis. JIMMY KIMMEL: Yes, yes.
ELLIE KEMPER: And there are some in Brooklyn.
But I do think when you go to New York,
you have to adopt sort of a different--
like I learned you can't necessarily say hi to everyone.
You have to be a little bit tougher.
JIMMY KIMMEL: What happens when you say hi to people?
ELLIE KEMPER: Can I say it on national television?
JIMMY KIMMEL: Yeah.
ELLIE KEMPER: If you say hi to someone, and they--
I think everyone in New York is like proud
of being in New York. JIMMY KIMMEL: Yeah.
ELLIE KEMPER: And so the friendliness
manifests itself in a way where they just don't say hi back.
Does that make sense?
Like they're just mean, but in a nice way.
JIMMY KIMMEL: They're not mean. Yeah.
There's a gruff-- a gruff but lovable quality in New Yorkers.
ELLIE KEMPER: That's gruff but lovable.
JIMMY KIMMEL: Yes. ELLIE KEMPER: Yes, yes.
Well, no, you're just lovable. I mean, I know you're from here.
JIMMY KIMMEL: No, no, I know what you mean.
Yeah. Well, I'm from New York, also.
ELLIE KEMPER: Yeah.
JIMMY KIMMEL: Yes, it's different.
There's a different thing going on here.
ELLIE KEMPER: Yes.
And so I feel like, OK, well, I can't smile
at everyone like a little rube.
So when I first moved here years ago, I adopted a tough face.
But my tough face, in my head, it's so tough.
JIMMY KIMMEL: Can I see what the tough face looks like?
ELLIE KEMPER: The tough face is just--
[LAUGHTER]
Oh, I'll look at myself as I do it.
Yeah. It looks like I'm hungry.
JIMMY KIMMEL: Yeah.
[LAUGHTER]
ELLIE KEMPER: Oh, yeah, I'm happy.
JIMMY KIMMEL: It does look like--
ELLIE KEMPER: Yeah.
JIMMY KIMMEL: It looks like your sister
got more yogurt than you did.
ELLIE KEMPER: Oh, now I'm mad.
Now, that makes me mad.
JIMMY KIMMEL: Well, now there I can see.
Now, I'm getting nervous.
ELLIE KEMPER: [LAUGHS] You should.
JIMMY KIMMEL: This is your autobiography.
ELLIE KEMPER: Yes.
JIMMY KIMMEL: May I ask, is this squirrel you have on the cover,
is that the live New York squirrel?
ELLIE KEMPER: Let's be honest.
OK.
The squirrels in New York are a different breed altogether.
They are insane.
They're way too comfortable around people.
And stay away.
I guess you're all from New York.
But stay away from the squirrels in New York.
This particular--
JIMMY KIMMEL: The squirrels are just like the people here
really. [INAUDIBLE]
ELLIE KEMPER: Absolutely.
JIMMY KIMMEL: You have to approach them properly,
or they'll strangle you. ELLIE KEMPER: Yes.
That's right.
They're just gruff.
They're not lovable, just gruff.
That is Photoshopped--
JIMMY KIMMEL: Oh. ELLIE KEMPER: --probably.
I mean, how could we have possibly gotten this shot?
Yeah. That has to be Photoshopped.
But the squirrel was real.
And his name was squirrel.
His trainer's name-- JIMMY KIMMEL: Really?
ELLIE KEMPER: Yes. I love this fact.
His trainer's name was Bambi.
Bambi was a human.
JIMMY KIMMEL: Bambi was a person.
ELLIE KEMPER: A person-- squirrel was a squirrel.
And I'm bad with animals.
I never had a pet.
And so it like took some doing to get a good photo, I think.
JIMMY KIMMEL: Whose idea was it to put an actual squirrel
on the cover?
Is that something you wanted as part of the plan?
ELLIE KEMPER: I don't know whose actual-- in my original
idea, I thought, wouldn't it be funny
if the squirrel were like thrashing at me,
and I was like bloody.
And he was like--
then I thought, what are you talking-- you want
the squirrel to do that to you? That's insane!
JIMMY KIMMEL: No.
You definitely don't want the squirrel to do that to you.
ELLIE KEMPER: No.
And you want to sell books, so no blood.
JIMMY KIMMEL: Do you feel like after writing an autobiography,
and everyone in your life and the people who really are
interested in you reading this, that you
have no stories left to tell?
ELLIE KEMPER: Correct. JIMMY KIMMEL: Yeah.
ELLIE KEMPER: Yeah.
I'm not sure I had-- look, it's a very thin book.
You're kind to call it an autobiography.
It's a collection.
Autobiography, I mean, what have I lived?
I don't have that much to tell.
But, no, I want to sell books.
I have a lot of things to talk about [INAUDIBLE]..
JIMMY KIMMEL: You've been through a lot.
ELLIE KEMPER: Yeah.
JIMMY KIMMEL: This journey you've been on
is inspiring to millions.
ELLIE KEMPER: Thank you.
JIMMY KIMMEL: It's where you came to New York from St. Louis
and survived.
And then you meet people.
And sometimes you put on a face. ELLIE KEMPER: Yeah.
JIMMY KIMMEL: And then they don't kill you.
ELLIE KEMPER: That's right.
JIMMY KIMMEL: It's inspirational.
ELLIE KEMPER: Thank you. JIMMY KIMMEL: It really is.
ELLIE KEMPER: Thank you.
Buy the book.
[LAUGHTER]
JIMMY KIMMEL: And people can learn to do all of that stuff.
ELLIE KEMPER: Yeah.
JIMMY KIMMEL: Ellie, one last thing I just want to say.
ELLIE KEMPER: Yeah.
JIMMY KIMMEL: Thank you for-- you were a part of our "All
in the Family" revival-- ELLIE KEMPER: Excuse me.
JIMMY KIMMEL: --on ABC.
ELLIE KEMPER: That's exactly right.
JIMMY KIMMEL: You played Gloria Bunker.
ELLIE KEMPER: [INAUDIBLE] [CHEERING]
Yeah.
JIMMY KIMMEL: And you did a fantastic job.
ELLIE KEMPER: I won the lottery.
I was so happy.
In fact, you were one of the first people
who I like indirectly told about my pregnancy because of that.
JIMMY KIMMEL: That's right. ELLIE KEMPER: Yeah.
Because I felt like, oh, they need to be
aware in case somehow it-- JIMMY KIMMEL: Right
ELLIE KEMPER: --should come to light.
But it was such an honor to be a part of that show.
JIMMY KIMMEL: We wanted to fire you
immediately when we heard that.
But the lawyers said it was illegal, I guess.
ELLIE KEMPER: I thought that would be your impulse.
JIMMY KIMMEL: It will be in the next book.
ELLIE KEMPER: That's right. Now I have a story to tell.
JIMMY KIMMEL: There is the book. It's called "My Squirrel Days."
Ellie Kemper, everybody. ELLIE KEMPER: Thank you.
JIMMY KIMMEL: Thank you, Ellie. ELLIE KEMPER: Thank you!
JIMMY KIMMEL: And we're right back with The National.
[CHEERING]