If you're looking for a healthy, satisfying meatless taco, look no further than the prickly
pear cactus you may have growing in your backyard right now. I've got one. No plant
has ever been easier to grow. This thing gets zero direct sunlight and it's still exploding.
That flower will turn into a cactus fruit that I can eat in the fall. But here in the spring,
you have the nopales — the new growth of paddles that pops up in the spring.
The young paddles at the tips are a little lighter in color, they're much more tender,
and those big spike-looking things are actually floppy and soft.
That doesn't mean you should touch these with your bare hands — I'm using tongs to twist
these off the plant. One paddle will yield one or two tacos. Oh, sorry to disturb you there. Yikes,
that cicada is still alive — there's the exoskeleton that it just molted out of. You
can buy nopales in the store of course, though you might have to seek out a Latin grocery.
So here's the part of these you have to be scared of — it's not
the big floppy spikes but these almost microscopic bunches of spikey hair.
These are called glochids. They have micro-barbs, and all you have to do
is brush up against them to have hundreds lodged beneath your skin. It's the worst.
So I'm grabbing the nopal by the tip with tongs and I will simply scrape at the surface with my
knife. Scrape hard — it's fine if you take off some skin while you're at it. Scrape both sides,
all sides until smooth. And then you generally go around and you trim off
the outer rim of the paddle — it's fibrous and it tends to have a very
heavy concentration of pokey things that you cannot easily scrape off.
Once done, you can just wash these off — thoroughly, and I'm still using my tongs
at first. There's tons of loose glochids in there that could still lodge in your skin,
and you definitely don't want them in your throat, so rinse and drain thoroughly.
One traditional way to cook these is to slice them into strips or squares,
boil them until soft and then maybe fry them quick
in a little oil. Another thing you can do is marinate them and then grill them.
I've got a lime and a lemon I'm squeezing in. I'm basically pretending this is
carne asada. Use less citrus if you don't like your food as tart as I do.
A big splash or two of soy sauce — enough to get everything covered.
Obviously not traditional but it'll make this taste meaty.
I've got some garlic I've chopped up. Then maybe some herbs and some spices. I've got
dried oregano, some pepper, toss in some oil — no salt, because we have the soy sauce. And
then I'll let that sit for as much time as I've got. 20 minutes would probably make a difference.
That'll make the nopales a little bit tastier. To make my writing a little bit tastier,
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Anyway, I'll chop up some toppings for these tacos. I've got a couple of mild
fresh chilies — I'll dice those up. Pretty red and orange ones because
cactus paddles don't look pretty when cooked, so it's good to top them with
prettier things. You could use tomatoes, but we already have lots of acid in this taco.
Hey, remember the Vidalia onion farm we visited in Georgia? Apparently, those guys are gonna send
me a box of onions every spring from now on. I'm not complaining. Sweet onions are particularly
nice for eating raw, and I want crunchy raw onion to contrast with the soft cactus.
I've got some fresh cilantro that I'll mow through. And then what's really good with
this is fresh, ripe avocado. It cuts the acid and it provides the richness and the
warmth you'd get from some fatty, braised piece of meat on a taco.
Gah, I broke the pit! This is not the safest way to get it out now but let's
just pretend that didn't happen. Scoop out the flesh with a spoon, and then I'll just
re-cover that with the skin to keep it from oxidizing and turning brown while we grill.
My grill is already hot. You could certainly just fry these off in a pan inside. Onto the
hot bars, and look at that string of slime hanging off. Cactus is full of mucilage,
the same stuff that makes okra slimy.
The boiling process is intended to get lots of that slime out, but I find that marinating the
cactus in acid and then grilling really hot also seems to cut or purge the excess slime. Lots of it
is now in the marinade, which you can see is being thickened by the mucilage, like gumbo.
I'd like it even thicker and this is a heat-safe bowl,
so on it goes and I'll just reduce that down to a sauce.
The nopales are ready to flip whenever you like the color. They taste to me
like little green bean steaks, and they're much less delicate than other vegetables.
You have to cook them a lot or else you can't bite through them. I might
even cover that for a minute — run in and get a plate to put them on.
These are definitely ready to flip, though I can feel they're not floppy enough to pull
yet. My sauce has reduced a bit. Maybe now I'll summon forth the upside-down
bear to balance out that salty and sour with some sweet. If I'd put it in the marinade,
the nopales would probably be burning by now. Sugar burns. Give that a stir.
After 10 minutes on the grill, those paddles feel almost floppy enough. I'll pull them
soon — I like them still a little toothsome. I can throw some corn tortillas on the grill for
a minute. If you're like me and you have trouble with the mealy texture of fresh corn tortillas,
just grill them for a sec or fry them in a pan for a sec — the texture totally changes.
Just don't go for too much color. You don't need any color at all,
and if you get these too hot, they'll lock up stiff as they cool. The cactus you can easily
reheat in the microwave if necessary, by the way. It's not crispy or anything.
My sauce has reduced a lot — it'll be thick enough after it cools. We're done here.
I'll cut the nopales into strips, like carne asada. Just stack it
up and slice through. I can feel these will still have a little bite,
which is nice. Throw them strips on a taco, top with some peppers,
onions — whenever possible I like to slice avocado at the last second, to prevent enzymatic browning.
Lay a slice on there, top with some cilantro. No other seasoning on here
because my sauce is citrusy, garlicy, reduced soy sauce — it's very salty,
so the net salt content of the total taco is just perfect.
That tastes really meaty, and fresh and healthy. I've been meaning to try
to cook that damn cactus for a while now and I'm shocked my first attempt came out
this good. This is no one's traditional taco, obviously, but it's mine and it's real tasty.
I feel like I should end with a pun about prickly things or sharp things but I have none so bye.