Hey everyone!
Welcome back to Lavendaire.
It's Aileen.
Today is the first video in our Dream Life Series, and I am so excited to get started.
If you missed the intro of this series, I'll link it below.
Basically, the Dream Life Series is a video + email series program
where I will be sharing videos on how to create your dream life
and also sending emails with extra content, worksheets, and bonuses.
So if you want to be part of the full program, the link is down below.
It's completely free.
So we're going to start with talking about mindset,
because if you want to create your dream life, you really have to start with the right mindset.
So today I'm going to go over a few different mindset shifts and mindset habits
that you should have in order to create the life that you've always wanted.
The first thing is: You must believe in yourself.
And I mean, fully truly believe in yourself.
I know it sounds very obvious, but some people make the mistake of having dreams
but deep down, they don't truly believe that it's possible.
To them, that dream is up in the clouds, it's so lofty,
and it will "never happen" in their reality.
So you have to really dig deep and ask yourself:
"Do I truly believe that that dream life that I want is possible?"
You basically have to be so sure that it's going to happen no matter what.
The second mindset shift that is super important is:
You have to learn to take 100% responsibility for your life and everything in it.
So remember this formula: Events + Response = Outcome
So events are the things that happen to you, are the circumstances that you cannot control.
But the response is how you respond to those events.
And how you respond to those events helps to create that outcome in the end.
So it means that you always have a choice
in how you respond to everything that happens to you in your life,
whether you respond positively or negatively.
You do have a say in the outcome of your life.
A mindset mistake that a lot of people make –
whether they realize it or not – is playing the victim,
meaning they blame external sources for their current life situation.
They may be blaming people or circumstances for where they are right now.
Maybe you're saying, "I can't succeed because I'm poor,"
or "I didn't go to a good school, so I can't get this good job that I want."
There are so many excuses that you can make, blaming external situations,
but learning to take full responsibility for your life is really learning
that you have a piece of that control over your outcome in your life.
Yes, you do have events and circumstances that happen that are out of your control,
but you can always control how you step up and respond to those situations,
how you step above it and not let it control you.
Always remember that you have the power to take responsibility for your life.
You have the power to step up and make that change, make whatever change you have.
Rather than blaming the parts that you can't control and feel sorry for yourself,
take advantage of the part that you can control
and use that to change your life, take responsibility for your life.
Next, you want to make sure that you have a growth mindset vs. a fixed mindset.
There is a book called Growth Mindset by Carol Dweck,
where she says people are split into two:
some have a fixed mindset and some have a growth mindset.
People with a fixed mindset generally believe that people don't change
and people just stay the same.
People with a growth mindset believe that people can grow, can change, can evolve.
So out of those two, it's pretty obvious that it's better to have a growth mindset
if you want to change your life because you want to evolve
and create that dream life that you want.
I go into more detail on this in another video that I've posted in the past, so I'll link that below.
But just know that you have to believe that you can grow, believe that you can change.
Don't believe that the way you're born and the way you are right now
is the way you're going to be forever.
It is possible to change.
You just have to get out of your comfort zone and push yourself.
But it is possible.
The fourth mindset habit is having a positive perspective on your journey.
So I took a course by business coach Todd Herman,
and he said that, after doing research and talking to a lot of people,
he could immediately tell which ones would succeed,
and which ones will have a hard time succeeding, based on their perspective on their journey.
Imagine two people who are in a similar point in their journey.
The first person looks ahead in their journey and thinks,
"Oh my gosh, I still have so much left to go," and they end up feeling discouraged
because it seems like such a struggle because they have a lot left to go.
And the other person, when asked about their journey, they're like,
"Well, I'm not exactly where I want to be, but look how far I've already come.
I've come so far and I'm so inspired by what I've already accomplished."
So from those perspectives, the latter is going to be the one that's more likely to succeed
because they're looking back and appreciating what they have accomplished.
They're remembering that they have done something.
And even though the journey ahead is long,
they're not focused on the difficulty and the struggle of it.
They're focused on, "Wow, look how far I've already come,"
and they just keep going because they have that positive mindset.
Whereas the first person looks ahead to the struggle and feels discouraged
and has that mindset of, "I don't know if I can do this.
I don't know if I can last that long."
So I hope that you understood that it's so important to have a positive perspective on your journey.
It's important to be grateful and appreciative of everything that you have right now,
everything that you've already accomplished, to be proud of yourself and inspired by that,
rather than focusing on everything that you don't have and everything that you lack.
When you focus on what you already have and what you've already accomplished,
you're creating that energy for more of that to appear in your life.
If you're so focused on what you don't have
and you're feeling discouraged and you're focused on the struggle,
then you're just going to create more of that struggle and discouragement in your life.
I hope that makes sense.
The next mindset habit is learning to listen to your intuition.
Your intuition is your guiding compass in your dream life.
It really is how you find your true path.
And I truly believe that your intuition is connected to the divine and the spiritual,
if you choose to believe in that.
It really is the voice of truth in your life.
I feel like I can always trust my intuition.
I do know that in the beginning of my journey, my intuition wasn't very strong.
It was easy to listen to other people and external sources,
because in this world everybody's telling you, "Do this, do that."
Everybody has an opinion, right?
So the only way that you know that something is right for you,
is if you feel it inside, is if you listen to your intuition.
Strengthening your intuition is a whole other topic.
I actually have a podcast about that that I'll link below.
But just know that if you want to create that dream life,
you got to learn to follow your heart.
Follow your intuition.
Next is to learn to cultivate an endurance mindset, meaning you're in this game for the long haul.
You're gonna build your stamina, because life is marathon.
It's not a sprint.
So having principles instilled in yourself, like commitment to your journey:
you gotta learn to commit to whatever that dream is.
Having patience, because you know it's not going to be easy and it's going to take time,
so you gotta learn to be patient.
Don't take shortcuts.
Really take it slow and steady.
And persevere no matter what.
It's so important to persist because you never know when that breakthrough is going to happen.
You never know when the next step or next action is going to create amazing results.
You just have to keep trying, no matter what.
And one quote that I wrote in my phone, in my journal, everywhere, was:
"No matter how hard it is or how bad it gets, I'm going to make it."
So you gotta really build that strong, strong mindset, have that mentality.
And it's not easy.
It's kind of like exercising.
It's not easy when you start out, but you have to just show up and keep going
in order to get stronger and stronger and stay in this game as long as possible.
I really believe that when you fail, that's only when you stop trying,
and people fail when they just give up.
But if you just don't give up and you keep trying,
and you keep trying new ways to get to your goal, eventually you're going to make it.
Or you're gonna get somewhere, okay?
It's all about having that endurance mindset.
Lastly, I gotta mention self love.
Having self love is so important, so central to living your dream life,
because you have to love and support yourself through this journey.
It's not going to be easy, so why beat yourself up over it?
You know what I mean?
You gotta be encouraging, loving, compassionate to yourself.
So, learning to be your own best friend in this journey is so important
because it's going to help you last longer,
if you truly give yourself the love and the care.
Previously I talked about the endurance mindset, which is pretty bam-bam-bam hard,
but having self love and self care in the end is the gentler way to balance it all,
because yes you gotta work hard,
but yes you also gotta love yourself and take care of yourself,
or else you're not gonna last that long.
You're gonna get burnt out.
Alright, so if you are ready to get started with the right mindset to create your dream life,
I have some journal prompts for you to help you look within
to kind of decode what your current mindset is
and figure out how you can shift it to having the right mindset.
And that's going to be in the email that I've sent to you guys.
So if you are not signed up for the email course yet, definitely click that link below to get started.
Also, if you make any posts about the series,
if you're working on your journaling prompts or something –
make sure you hashtag #DreamLifeSeries and #Lavendaire so we can see it and share it.
And I will be back with the next video on Wednesday,
so make sure you're signed up through the email link so you can get that notification.
And I think that's it for today.
Have a beautiful day, and I will see you guys next time.
Bye!