I never read Homestuck, but I was around people who did.
So this is my general assumption of what went down.
Starts off with four kids.
Dave?
Jade?
The one Sammi cosplayed who is also named Sammi?
And Josh or Scott
I don't- I don't know his name.
But it's, it's, one of those two.
Anyways, they get pulled into a computer game
And they meet these things called Trolls
Uh, so that's, um...
Ramella. and she is the ram.
I assume 'cuz I think that's the symbol for ram and she kinda got ram horns.
She's a bad guy.
uuhhh... His name is Travis.
And he is the uh, is the Gemini?
And uh, he broke his sunglasses probably falling down the stairs-
He looks like he had an accident
He's got two left feet cause he's Gemini
So this is Harry Potter the Aquarius troll.
He's part mermaid, part troll and he's gonna expelliarmus your ass.
'Kay so this ones also got gills
So i'm just gonna like, throw it out there and say she's, Pisces.
So this is Priscilla.
Her power is fortune telling
and she's a Good guy
Uh, despite what her face looks like.
I actually know this one, cuz like, EVERYBODY knows which ones Gamzee.
It's the motherfucking crazy one.
And I think he kills people...
Actually I'm 98% sure he kills people.
So he's a bad guy.
Oh god, she looks like a [BLEEP]
OH GOD THAT'S THE SYMBOL FOR SCORPIO-
She's the Scorpio one.
*sigh* Oh god, I know so many Scorpio's, I don't want to call 'em out like this.
This is Cruella de Vil, she could kill you with just a glance.
But she would rather just, you stay the fuck out of her way.
Oh god, ok, that's Cancer.
This is 420 the troll.
I'd say he's a good guy but he's constantly high.
He's just like, always in the bathroom trying to give you drugs.
I bet he's he's the one that speaks in that stupid language.
Oh that's Leo!
Your name is, Le on uhhh...
Oh, no no no, I know this one. I know this one.
Nnnnnnnnnnnnnn
ayyyyyyyy
Naomi, or some shit like that.
She's a kitty. She's a good guy?
But nobody likes her because she
she, may or may not of started the nya thing.
Oh wait maybe that's Gemini-
Oh fuck I don't know now-
OKAY SO THIS IS GEMINI 2, THIS IS GEMINI'S TWIN
The other guy who got his shit kicked, this guy is the one who did the shit kicking I assume
His name is, uh, Ringo Star
Because he got annoying glasses that I don't like
And he's got one shoe
Cuz the other one, is FIRMLY IMPLANTED UP HIS ASS-
This is Taurus and his name is...
UMMMMM
I'm just gonna go with Taurosa
His power is bad haircuts, and I feel like he is a good guy.
Is he wearing Sandals?
Why is he wearing socks with Sandals?
I hate him now.
So, this is Jane
aaaand, she, hates everything.
She does her taxes on time.
And I feel like shes a bad guy,
I feel like she dies early on.
She got that look like, Please kill me off.
OH GOD I DON'T KNOW MY ASTROLOGICAL SYMBOLS-
This is Mercury the Virgo
So i'm gonna say she's a good guy.
Even though her horns kinda look like the, like they're doing the
Like they look like they can do the sex ting.
So they have to save their world, and the game world.
From, like a dude with a Jackal head.
And, like, the mask but gone wrong(?)
Then they all get super powers and to represent this, they all get tunics.
They, They do kinda good. But then I think they get pushed back in time
Where there's alternate versions of themselves
Aaaand, like it was the ones before them?
I feel like it's Alpha and Beta kids.
But they don't really matter because I think they died or something in their timeline.
And the real story is with the main kids.
And the story involves Rufio and like a lot of people die in it.
And like, took 8 years to write 5 million words about fucking nothing.
It's like the Shakespeare of our day and age
You're going to have to have translation notes on the next page to be like "What the fuck is happening here?"
This is 8 years of this man's life
He fucking spent 8 years and NOBODY KNOWS WHAT THE FUCK HE'S TALKING ABOUT-
But in the end they all get to go home. And now they're stuck at home.
And that's why it's called Homestuck.
I knew one of them was Karkat but I didn't know which one was Karkat.
(That's Karkat)
The one who sells me drugs is Karkat-
(Gamzee)
Yup, I knew that one. I knew one, I got one out of Twelve, That's not bad.
He is the worst.
Oh god I hate this person- no wait is that Cancer? That's Cancer. Is that Cancer?