>> Stephen: HEY, EVERYBODY. PLEASE SAY HELLO TO LOUIS CATO
AND "THE LATE SHOW" BAND. NICE TO SEE YOU.
NICE TO SEE ALL YOU BEAUTIFUL PEOPLE OVER THERE.
DID YOU HAVE A NICE WEEK OFF? ANYBODY DO ANYTHING PARTICULARLY
FUN IN YOUR WEEK OFF? >> I WENT TO SEE ENDEA PLAY WITH
ELVIS COSTELLO. >> Stephen: HOW DID IT GO?
DID YOU SAY HI FOR ME? >> I DID SAY HI.
>> Stephen: DID HE RECEIVE IT WELL?
>> IT WAS OKAY. >> Stephen: THAT'S WHAT YOU
GET. THAT'S WHAT YOU GET FROM ELVIS.
IN A MINUTE, SITTING RIGHT OVER THERE WE'RE GOING TO HAVE, UNTIL
RECENTLY, CHIEF OF STAFF TO PRESIDENT JOE BIDEN, RON KLAIN
IS GOING TO BE OUT HERE. I'M GOING TO ASK HIM ABOUT, HE
WAS STILL THERE, HE WAS STILL IN THERE WHEN THEY WERE FIRST SEEN,
CERTAINLY THE CHINESE BALLOON. AND THEN THE OTHER THINGS BEFORE
THEY SHOT THEM DOWN, HE WAS STILL IN THERE I BELIEVE.
I THINK HE GOT OUT RIGHT BEFORE THEY POPPED THEM.
>> Louis: HE MAY HAVE SOME INTEL.
SPIN AND I HOPE YOU WELL. LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, BEFORE
THAT, WE HAVE OUR FIRST GUEST. MY FIRST GUEST IS ONE OF MY TOP
SIX FAVORITE JOHNS. WE COUNTED.
WE COUNTED BEFORE THE SHOW. TOP THREE, I WAS LIKE "EH, SIX."
PLEASE WELCOME BACK TO "THE LATE SHOW," JOHN OLIVER.
♪ LIFE GOES ON DAY AFTER DAY ♪ ♪ ♪
THERE YOU GO. >> John: GOOD EVENING.
GOOD EVENING. TO ONE AND ALL.
>> Stephen: NICE TO SEE YOU. HEY, HOW ARE YOU DOING?
HOW HAVE YOU BEEN? >> John: ALL RIGHT.
TOP SIX? >> Stephen: I HAVE A LOT OF
JOHNS AND MY FAMILY. >> John: I WILL GIVE YOU THAT
FOR FREE. >> John: BATISTE LEFT YOU.
EXPERIENCE STRICTLY JOHN. >> John: I'M NOT EVEN GETTING
INTO THE JONS. COMING HERE FOR A TOP 6H.
>> Stephen: LATER I WILL TELL YOU WHO SCORED ABOVE YOU.
LET'S EARN IT. >> John: LET'S SEE HOW MUCH I
AGREE. >> Stephen: THAT'S CALLED
DRIVING TO AN END. NOW THEY'VE GOT TO STICK AROUND
TO FIGURE OUT WHO I LIKE MORE THAN YOU WHO'S NAME JOHN.
>> John: WHAT COMMERCIAL CLAIMS TO COMMERCIAL -- WHAT A
GLIMPSE TO COMMERCIAL TELEVISION THAT IS.
I HAVE THE OPPOSITE. IT'S NOT TOO IN, IT'S LIKE YOU
CAN'T LEAVE UNTIL I FINISH TALKING ABOUT COMPOUNDING
PHARMACIES. IF I EVER HAD ONE COMMERCIAL
BREAK IN THE STORY, EVERYONE WOULD LEAVE.
>> Stephen: IF YOU EXHALED. ONE BREATH.
>> John: ONE BREATH. THAT'S THE END.
THAT'S THE ONLY WAY TO ACTUALLY GET PEOPLE TO LISTEN TO THE
[BLEEP] WE HAVE TO SAY. >> Stephen: SPEAKING A
BROADCAST, YOU'RE AN AMERICAN. >> John: YES.
>> Stephen: DID YOU WATCH THE SUPER BOWL.
>> John: OF COURSE. >> Stephen: DID YOU ENJOY?
>> John: I LOVE IT AS AN EVENT.
IT IS A CARTOONISH EVENT, LITERALLY TOO BIG IN EVERY
POSSIBLE WAY. WHAT'S NOT TO LIKE ABOUT IT?
YOU HAVE THE CITY OF PHILADELPHIA REPRESENTED AS
WELL. COME ON.
>> Stephen: YES. I WAS HOPING THEY WOULD WHEN
ACTORS BECAUSE I ENJOY WATCHING THE PEOPLE ATTEMPT TO CLIMB THE
GREASED UP LIGHT POLES. >> John: EITHER WAY, IF THE
PHILLIES ARE IN -- IF THE PHILLIES IN THE
SUPER BOWL, EITHER WAY THE CITY IS GOING TO BURN.
ARE THEY FLAMES OF JOY OR RAGE? YOU ARE WORKING BACKWARDS FROM
ARSON ON A MASSIVE SCALE. THE THING THAT'S GROSS TO ME
ABOUT THE SUPER BOWL, THEY GIVE IT TO THE OWNER FIRST, THE
TROPHY. >> Stephen: THE LOMBARDI.
>> John: THE TEAM HAS WON, THE COACH HAS --
YOU HAVE A [BLEEP] 70-YEAR-OLD BILLIONAIRE SAYING "I WOULD LOVE
TO THANK MY FAMILY FOR THIS." WHAT?
YOUR FAMILY HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH THIS, NOTHING.
YOU SHOULDN'T EVEN BE ON THE FIELD.
YOU SHOULD BE IN YOUR EXECUTIVE BOX SHUTTING UP.
THAT'S WHAT SHOULD BE HAPPENING. IN NO OTHER SPORT DO YOU GIVE IT
TO THE OWNER FIRST. >> Stephen: THEY DON'T DO THAT
IN YOUR FOOTBALL? >> John: DON'T DO THAT WITH
YOUR HAND. DON'T DO THAT.
I FELT IT. I SAW IT IN MY PERIPHERAL VISION
AND I FELT A GUST. >> Stephen: I'M HAPPY FOR YOU.
>> John: NO, WE DON'T. IT'S ABOUT PEOPLE THAT DID IT.
THE FACT THAT YOU WOULD GIVE IT TO THE OWNER FIRST AND THEN
INTERVIEW HIM IS ABSOLUTELY GROTESQUE.
IT HAS TO STOP. >> Stephen: IT MUST BE FUN
FOR TEM BECAUSE WHO ELSE GETS TO DO THAT OTHER THAN THE OWNER
OF THE FOOTBALL TEAM? >> John: SURE.
I HAVE $20 BILLION AND NOW I HAVE THIS SHINY THING.
I TIRE OF IT NOW. WHAT ELSE WILL FILL THIS VACUUM
INSIDE ME? >> Stephen: THE REASON THEY
BUY THE TEAMS, THE REASON THEY BUY THE TEAMS IS BECAUSE THEY
HAD $20 MILLION BUT NOBODY KNEW THEY HAD $20 MILLION.
THEN THEY BUY THE TEAM AND EVERYBODY KNOWS.
>> John: YEAH, SURE. PART OF ME THINKS IT'S ALSO THE
KIND OF STILL OWN PEOPLE BUT ANYWAY, IT DOESN'T MATTER.
THEY'RE NOT THE NICEST PEOPLE, NFL OWNERS.
THEY HAVE PROVEN THAT. THAT'S NOT ME PROJECTING THAT.
THEY HAVE PROVEN THAT. >> Stephen: HOW WOULD YOU
COMPARE AMERICAN FOOTBALL FANS WITH EUROPEAN FOOTBALL FANS?
THERE IS SOCCER HOOLIGANISM AS WE CALL IT OVER HERE.
IT'S FAMOUS. HOW WOULD YOU COMPARE THE FANS?
>> John: WE LIKE TO BREAK STUFF TOO.
THAT'S WHAT I LIKE ABOUT THE CITY OF PHILADELPHIA.
IT MAKES SENSE. A CITY THAT WAS KIND OF BORN OUT
OF SOME BRITISH INFLUENCE, AGAIN, LET'S NOT GET INTO WHAT
YOU DID AFTER THAT. BUT IT REALLY FEELS LIKE THERE
WAS SOME CONNECTIVE TISSUE TO HOOLIGANISM IN PHILLY.
THAT'S WHY I LIKE WHAT THEY DO. BEFORE THE GAME STARTS.
YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING THIS RIGHT.
>> Stephen: THAT'S THE SPECIAL RELATIONSHIP.
DESTROYING THINGS. WE HAVE TO TAKE A QUICK BREAK
BUT DON'T GO ANYWHERE. WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK WITH MORE
MR. JOHN OLIVER, EVERYBODY.