My name is Luján. I'm 17 and I just finished high school.
I'll be starting university soon.
Here, it's typical for those graduating from high school
to do an end-of-the-year trip together, to finish off the year.
When we started talking about this in our final year, and the possibility of going to Bariloche,
I said: "I am not going to Bariloche"
- Are you sure? Don't you feel any pressure to just say: "Ok, fine..."
- I prefer to go somewhere else, some other plan. Even if my parents did let me go
I think I still wouldn't go.
I think I would get bored of it, seeing everyone get wasted...
- Well for me, I would at least want to think it over calmly for myself.
- But I did think it over myself.
- And still no?
- I don't want to.
My name is Daniel. I'm Argentinian,
I'm a doctor, racing fan,
and I'm the father of four children
I'm Rosana, I am the mother of four children.
I am a school teacher and right now, the director of studies.
Bariloche is a beautiful city in Patagonia, in the south.
All the kids in their final year want to go to Bariloche, generally speaking, to close out the year.
They do go around the city a bit,
but basically what they do is go to different nightclubs, etc. Places with a very intense nightlife, basically.
We are not big fans of this custom because
it basically leads to situations that are out of control.
It's not that you shouldn't drink, or that you shouldn't go out or go dancing,
I think all of that is wonderful and part of being young,
but that the only option they have is to go to Bariloche, I really don't think that's good.
My wife - a school teacher and director at a school -
she sees what's happening. I am a doctor, so I also see the consequences of it all.
I see the reality where it hits.
It's good that parents communicate their fears to their kids so that they come to understand.
It's good for parents to understand that
their children want to be with their friends and classmates from school.
The parents shouldn't treat it as something of little importance.
My parents got pretty involved at meetings with the parents at school, especially my mom
and I know she was pretty upset because
she felt like she was the only one proposing something else, with all the other parents saying,
"Why are you doing this? Just let her go to Bariloche, prep her well" and things like that, and that was it.
- I made some tea, do you want some?
- Oh, sure.
- How was your day?
- Tremendous.
- Tremendous?
- Yeah, but just some stuff at work...
You know what, I'm a bit worried. We had the parent meeting
and I was the only parent offering the kind of perspective that we have.
and the thing is that I don't know, this makes me doubt... I know what we have to do, but I suffer for Luján's sake
Do you think maybe we're wrong on this? Do you think what we're proposing is too strict?
Well this is what scares me. I think we need to go back and talk with her about it again.
Peer pressure isn't heavy: it's almost unbearable.
It's a constant thing. Everyone, even your friends say,
"Come on, why don't you just let her go? Nothing's going to happen."
We would love for them to do a final trip: it seems logical, normal, wonderful, fun... but not this way.
It's like you have no other choice to do anything else.
Yes, peer pressure often makes you stumble because, although you know where you're going,
sometimes the road is cut off, and we have to find an alternative route.
Many people were angry with me, some called me "Mama's girl" and other things to make me listen.
But it wasn't just a thing of listening to them, but rather what I already said: I was doing what I believe in
Now I am still a rebel, I don't want to protest anything without offering a positive solution
I don't want to fill my life with disorcer.
I rebel against all of that. I want to be a son of God, to have a relationship with God, and in addition,
I want to live my life doing all the good that I can, understanding, asking forgiveness, granting forgiveness, living in harmony with others
We were able to talk with a lot of peace: I understood their point of view,
and they understood that I wanted to do something with my friends
because this is my last year and it's understandable that we want to go out or whatever
In a family where there is habitual dialogue with the children
the ideal thing would be that the decision follows from a mutual agreement,
because this is coherent with the educational role that the family plays
from the time they are very young.
(knocking at the door)
- Yeah?
- Hi Luli. - Hi.
- Hi Lu, do you have a moment? - Sure.
- We wanted to talk with you a little bit
about the end-of-school trip, which has us a bit worried,
because we don't want you to get left out either.
- I understand your perspective,
and even I myself don't really want to follow the tradition of doing the trip to Bariloche
but with my girl friends we have actually come up with another plan, which is to do a trip to the beach.
- And you already know more or less who's going and what not?
- Yes, our group of friends.
- Oh that's perfect. - Very good, and you are happy with this decision?
- Yes, really I am.
- Well then, let's go ... - yes, great.
Those who seem to make history are those who are different,
those who think and do different things,
those who somehow manage to say, at one point or another:
"Look, this leads us here but I'm going to do something else."
I understand there's a lot of peer pressure, and it's true that it affects our life and we can't change that fact:
we can't block the sun with our hand.
So you have to be convinced about what you do, period.
It's difficult, because you are going to be different. These are your principles and not everyone shares them.
But it's worth it because you avoid having to do something "just because", which you'll regret doing later:
those things that you never really wanted to do. And to do things because you really want them
or because you really thought about it and said, "This is worthwhile."