TONIGHT WE PROUDLY PRESENT SCENES FROM A TRIO OF EXCITING
NEW STAGE-- SCREEN TO STAGE ADAPTATIONS.
LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, THESE ARE INAPPROPRIATE MUSICALS.
(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE) >> I TOLL HIM GO SCREW YOUR
FRIGGIN' MOTHER, POW, PING.
(LAUGHTER) >> YOU'RE A PISTOL, YOU'RE
REALLY FUNNY, YOU'RE REALLY FUNNY.
>> WHAT DO YOU MEAN I'M FUNNY.
>> FUNNY, YOU KNOW, IT'S A GOOD STORY, IT'S FUNNY.
YOU'RE A FUNNY GUY.
>> YOU THINK I'M FUNNY HOW.
AM I CLOWN TO YOU.
>> TOMORROWEE, TO NO, NO.
YOU THINK I'M FUNNY ♪ WHAT THAT'S SUPPOSED TO MEAN?
♪ YOU GOT IT ALL WRONG ♪ YOU THINK I'M FUNNY HOW ♪ AM I HEAR
TO AMUSE ♪ AM I FUNNY LIKE A CLOWN LIKE A BIG FLOPPY SHOE ♪.
>> WAIT, WHAT?
♪ SHOULD I WEAR MAKEUP ON PIE FACE AND BAGGY PANTALOONS, WEAR
A FUNNY WIG ♪ MAKE AN MALLS FROM BALLOONS ♪.
>> IF I'M SO FUNNY ♪ AND YOU THINK I'M FUNNY ♪ HOW AM I SO
FUNNY HOW ♪ GET OUT OF HERE.
TOMORROWEE.
(APPLAUSE) >> DID YOU SEE HIS FACE.
FOR GET ABOUT IT.
PING POW.
>> ARE YOU A FUNNY GUY.
(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE) ♪ PUTTING ING ME TO THE TEST ♪
VER FIE IT, VER FIE IT ♪ MAN FIGHT, MAN FIGHT ♪ I KNOW WHAT
YOU DID ♪ MAN FIGHT, MAN FIGHT ♪ YOU TRIED TO HURT MY KID ♪
♪ WHY FIGHT THOSE FEELINGS I CAN'T
SMOTTER ♪ WHY FIGHT IT ♪ WE WERE LEFT FOR EACH OTHER ♪ LIKE ROMEO
AND JULIET OR JET RO ♪ AGAINST THE ODDS ♪ HERE WE HAVE TO SEE
WHERE THIS GOES ♪ WHY FIGHT IT ♪ I AM NO NIGHTER ♪ I'M A LOVER ♪
WHY FIGHT IT ♪ WE WERE MEANT FOR EACH OTHER ♪ THIS IS MY PROBLEM
♪ ♪ THIS IS MY WISH ♪ TO KISS YOUR LIPS ♪ I'M THE SALMON
YOU'RE THE NEST ♪ I CAN'T ♪ I JUST CAN'T SO LET'S NOT TRY TO
FIGHT IT ♪ (CHEERS AND APPLAUSE)
♪ ARE YOU NOT ENTERTAINED?
ARE YOU NOT ENTERTAINED.
IS THIS NOT WHY YOU ARE HERE?
I SAID, ARE YOU NOT ENTERTAINED ♪ IS THAT NOT WHY YOU'RE HERE ♪
WHEN I MAKE, WHY DO YOU NOT CHEER ♪ AM I LOSING MY MIND ♪
CUZ I'M ALREADY LOST MY PAST ♪ YOU ARE ONE NOW ♪ DO YOU WANT ME
TO DANCE ♪ ARE YOU NOT ENTERTAINED ♪ BY A LITTLE SOFT
SHOE ♪ WOULD IT HELP ♪ I CAN CUT A-- ♪ WHAT DOES IT TAKE TO GET A
LITTLE FEEDBACK ♪ I COULD CUT OFF HIS HEAD ♪ I CAN ♪ ♪ IN THE
OLDEN DAYS ♪ FOLKS WERE EASY TO PLEASE ♪ I NOW A DAY THEY WANT
SOME RAZZMATAZZ ♪ THEY'RE STRAIGHT FORWARD ♪ THEY WANT A
LITTLE JAZZ ♪ ♪ THAT WAS GOOD.
>> I COULDN'T TELL, I COULDN'T TELL ♪ WAS I EVER.
>> WAS I EVER?
>> ♪ ARE YOU NOT EPT TAINED ♪ DO YOU NOT LIKE THE SHOW ♪ BETTER
LET US KNOW ♪ OTHERWISE WE'LL JUST GO ♪ MY NAME IS GLADZ
YAITER ♪ MY NAME IS MOW ♪ WE'RE DYING OF ANTICIPATING ♪ DID YOU
LIKE THE SHOW?
♪ (CHEERS AND APPLAUSE)
GLADIATOR.
>> WHAT IS IT THE HERO REVEAL HIMSELF AND TELL US ALL YOUR
REAL NAME.
>> WHAT'S A NAME MAN, TELL US WHAT IS YOUR NAME MAN ♪ WHAT IS
YOUR NAME ♪ WHAT'S YOUR NAME MAN ♪ TELL US YOUR NAME MAN ♪ TELL
US WHAT NAME MAN WHAT IS YOUR NAME?
>> MY NAME IS MAXIMUS DECIMUS MER I HAD US, COMMANDER OF THE
ARMIES OF THE NORTH.
LOYAL SERVANT TO THE TRUE EMMERRER, MARCUS AURELIAS,
FATHER TO A MURDERED SON.
HUSBAND TO A MURDERED WIFE, AND I WILL HAVE MY VEN GANS IN THIS
LIFE OR THE NEXT.
>> LIKE I DON'T-- ♪ ♪ THIS, THIS, THIS ♪ SO YOU ♪ WERE
ENTERTAINED ♪ THAT'S WHY YOU ARE HERE ♪ A LITTLE BIT IS NOW A HIT
♪ THROUGH ALL SHAKESPEARE ♪ WE'LL DO A ♪ ARE YOU ENTERTAINED
♪ ♪ MR. WILL ARNETT, MR. MARTIN SHORT.
COME ON BACK, EVERYBODY.