- In this video I will share with you six ways
on how desperation can ruin your dating life
and your relationship.
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Hello, my name is Greta Bereisaite,
I'm a dating and relationship coach for women.
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And just before I will share with you those six ways
how you can ruin your dating and relationship life
by acting desperate,
don't forget to take my free self-awareness test
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or a low value woman,
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So now without further ado,
the desperate behavior number one is,
so this is kind of like, a lot of insecure women
behave very, very desperate when a guy pulls away.
Seeing that when guys play many, many games
and when a woman doesn't see him playing those games,
she starts getting more and more insecure.
So let's not just blame women for being insecure.
Let's put some blame on men
to constantly, purposely making women feel insecure
that they reach their desperate point.
The way I'm gonna describe to you, ladies,
no one should ever go this way,
however, when you keep purposely making a person
feel insecure, insecure, insecure,
and the person doesn't have guts,
doesn't have strength to leave a relationship,
we can potentially make the most crucial mistakes
in their life.
And this happened to actually one of my friends
a long, long time ago.
The guy kept making her insecure, insecure, insecure,
and anyway, years later, I think maybe five years later,
after them dating, she eventually met his parents.
And after meeting his parents, he pulled away from her,
and she didn't hear from him for about three or four days,
which can kind of be somewhat natural.
However, it can also be a game,
and she got so insecure and so upset.
She ended up going out and having a one night stand
with another guy and becoming pregnant.
And now she has twins with that guy.
So, I'll leave you with that.
Desperate behavior number two is
women that reach an age where their time is ticking
and they are in need to have children fast.
I find that nowadays, especially in like London,
it is becoming a big problem
because I see men in their 40s, or even later,
still staying they not ready to have a family
or be not ready to have children
or men in their 30s saying like, you know, "When I'm 40,
I will be ready to get married and have children."
Well, for many women, the year 40 to have children
is already too late.
And nowadays I see a lot of single ladies at 40
with no children because we were being careful
that men we were dating in the past,
in order not to get pregnant,
in order not to put a baggage on her and the guy,
if you are not married,
and now these women are 40 years old or just over 40
or in their late 30s, and they are quite desperate
to have children.
So when we date a guy, the guy starts to feel the pressure.
He feels her desperation
and a lot of times,
she ends up pushing that guy away from her.
It's really hard to advise these women
because I totally understand
the position they are in.
Me personally, I'm a Christian
and I have insane amount of faith in God,
and God doesn't work by these type of rules.
And there are a lot of famous stories in the Bible
where women were barren or they were way too old
to have children, and it just happened.
So I would say whatever you do, do not pressure the guy,
whether it's having faith,
whether it's having a plan B, such as adopting a child,
but do not push a man to have a baby if he is not ready.
Long term, he might have resentment
if it does happen, towards you
or he'll just see "I'm not ready," and you'll just run away.
Which case, actually, maybe it's not even that bad,
'cause there are men
that are quite desperate to have children too
and they are in their mid or late 40 as well.
Number three desperation is
when women are desperate to get married.
So we just want marriage desperately.
We just want children.
We just want a husband. We want a family.
There is nothing wrong
in wanting children and the family and the husband.
However, it becomes wrong
when you behave from a desperate side.
Why does it become wrong?
Because women that behave desperate,
they lose their standards.
They literally don't care who they are dating.
They just put any guy
that gives them a little bit of attention on a pedestal,
imagine the most beautiful things about them
and they just keep pursuing this fantasy with a guy.
It's a big turn off, ladies,
especially when you don't even know a person.
It's even insulting to a guy.
He's like, "Wow, she's like so desperate to get married.
She doesn't even know me
and she is putting me on a pedestal,
she's complimenting me,
she's asking me where is this going,
she wants a relationship with me, she wants to marry me,
but she doesn't even know me as a person.
We literally just met two weeks ago
or a few months ago.
Showing to a guy that this desperation
that you are very naive,
that he can't even trust you because how can he trust you?
If you don't even know him
trying to pursue the relationship to go very, very far.
You know, you don't even come across wise.
So not only that,
it's a turn off from a side, but you're behaving masculine,
you're sweeping him off your feet
and you're pressuring, pressuring, pressuring
but you are also coming across very silly
and very naive and absolutely not a wife material.
No man wants to marry a woman that's naive.
Ladies, guys date naive woman,
so we take advantage of her.
We don't marry naive women.
We take advantage of them.
If a guy wants to get married
he's gonna look for a wise wife.
Who's gonna be a good example to his children growing up.
Who's not going to be dumb and act desperate.
Number four that came across quite recently
for my clients is girls start to behave
a bit desperate when we feel a bit of coldness from the guy.
So you start to feel insecure
and automatically we assume the worst
that like bad things will happen
and that he's dating others
or he lost interest or he lost attraction for her.
And automatically even while being in a relationship
that women start to go on the dates with other guys.
Ladies, a guy can pull away
from you for a couple days
and it's okay if you don't hear from him for a day or two,
especially if you are in a long term relationship, you know,
things happen, people get busy.
Sometimes, something is on our mind.
Sometimes people just need space.
Guys have pull aways.
Girls sometimes need space.
So if you get so insanely insecure
that you didn't hear from him for two days
and now you start to run and date others.
And when he comes back to you, he finds out about that.
Well, it just shows that he can't trust you.
He can't trust you when he pulls away for a day or two,
maybe even fishing with his guys for like a weekend
and you didn't hear from him for a couple of days
and now you are desperately like running on the dates.
Once he finds out about that,
the likability of him dumping you on a spot
is very, very high
because it shows that you are insanely insecure
and that you're not to be trusted.
Have a really good video, ladies.
Check it out, why men need to pull away.
You can find it just by following the link right here.
Number five is again,
when you start to feel insecure in a relationship,
you think of the ways on how to get more attention.
So a lot of women, what we do,
we purposely make a guy jealous
and it's so easy for us to do that because let's face it.
We get male attention everywhere and anywhere
and if we wanted to have a lots of guy friends
to keep them as friends,
especially the ones that we are not into
but we into us, we could have them, right?
So when you're dating a guy that you actually fancy or love
and he doesn't give you maybe quite a bit of attention,
like right now and you feel insecure,
it is a very tempting to be sneaky
and make him jealous with your guy friend
and a lot of times these guy friends, yes,
they will take you out and they will pay for everything
because he's now thinking about maybe he could snatch you
from your current guy, right?
However, ladies, if you behave this way
especially quite regularly, you are just showing to a guy
that he can get better.
He can get a better woman
who's much more secure who doesn't need to make him jealous
on regular basis
and who's basically have better things to do in life
than create drama situations
and yes, some guys will still fall for this
and we might give you a bit more attention
for the time being cause there is competition now.
These guys are usually still quite insecure.
However, a mature high value man,
he will see right through your game.
He will see you as insecure
and is gonna be a big big put off to him, towards you.
Number six desperation
and I feel like it should have been number one
because it is so popular.
So when women want love and we want affection
and attention and touch and just feel loved.
A lot of girls, we have one night stands.
You know, we look for love in lust.
We look for love in one night stands.
Ladies, none of the guys will ever make love to you
if you are sleeping on a first date.
He doesn't care about you.
He cares about meeting his needs only
that perhaps a pretty picture.
That's all that it is.
Looking for love in these situations
is not only desperate and naive
but it can also be dangerous.
Consequences for that usually are a lot of hurt feelings.
Disrespecting, devaluing your own body,
losing value and respect towards yourself
and yes, maybe in the beginning
you can like sweep these feelings
under the carpet, right?
But when 20 years down the line,
you're gonna be going to therapist, after therapist,
after therapist and
after therapist, thinking what is wrong with me?
And where did I got these unresolved issues from?
Oh, basically it's not worth it.
Do not do it and do not let society influence you otherwise
because it's dumb and it's stupid
and no, it does not make you look cool
and no, it does not give you any value.
If anything, it completely crushes your whole self-esteem.
So ladies, these were my six ways
on where women behave desperate
and we turn guys off in dating and relationships.
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So thank you my ladies, thank you so much for watching.
Have a beautiful day and kisses from UK.