*High-Five* Top O' The Mornin' To Ya Laddies!
My name is Jacksepticeye and
welcome back to Sniper Elite 4.
I have a new gun on my back.
I was able to upgrade my gun for
five dollars. Apparently that's all it takes to
buy a new gun.
I had eight, I bought a gun for five,
so what does that leave us with?
*pauses for answer*
Oh, I thought it was two. Jeez, god, my math is bad.
What's up, fellers?
What are we doin'? "Talk to Lucio?"
From Overwatch?
You guys got any like biscuits?
What's in those boxes?
It says "Achtung" on it.
I know that that's not what's in it.
But seriously, like it doesn't even have to be sweets
or treats or anything like that.
Like sausages!
Potatoes!
Nothing.
Well, I GUESS I'M GOING HUNGRY ON THIS MISSION!
THAAAT is a big gun!
Good mother of god, that is a giant gun on a train.
You think somebody's compensating for something?
*distant boom* Sniper: "That's loud enough to disguise my rifle fire."
Whoa, even from here! Holy shit! That's awesome.
Sniper: "Jager troops. Bohm isn't taking any chances."
"Jager troops?" Doesn't "jaeger" mean like "hunter?"
*du's "Attack on Titan" theme* Da da du du du du
DAH!
Oh, it's a sniper is it?
I fucking got this-
Oh god, they are SO far away!
*BANG* OH my GOD, that is far away!
*intense wooshie woosh*
Holy shit! Oh, right in his head! *splat*
Oh yeah! How far was that?
"Longshot."
Five hundred and fifty five meters!
Good lord!
That was AWESOME!
Ok, I THINK there are Explosive things over there, that I can shoot.
Uh, I need to highlight them.
There...
That's the ones...
That's the ones, by Crockett!
*BANG* HA!!!
Dude, I hope you don't like the smell of burnt hair! *CRACK*
Ooooh yes!
Did he have metal inside him?
*BANG* AOHh! That's- That's
That's a Kill Shot right there!
Tink! *splat* *PING*
Yikes!
*sucks through teeth*
That is some attention to detail.
I love that when you can see the bullet come out,
it's all, like, crumpled.
This place is nice!
This is a nice ass place.
Did I say how nice this place is?
Do I really only have to-?
Ok, no there's a lot of fucking missions to do.
Good mother of Christ!
That's the railway gun,
I have to locate a pilot, I have to
secure a checkpoint, (x3)
destroy car, place charge,
locate plane, and destroy cache!
That's a LOT of things to do for me.
I don't have the attention span for this.
[German accent] A little kampfire...
[German accent] Vould there be some bad guys around?
Maybe? Hopefully?
"Hold for- Rig for explosion?"
Could I do that?
Nah...
There's nobody here yet.
There's- Everybody's everywhere else. Good lord.
This is a big map!
I don't know what to do.
I'm gonna give people a taste of my rod though! ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
Oh god, there's a guy right there,
and there's a guy over there! Hello?
OhhOh.
Sneaky-sneaky-killy-man!
*WUMP* Tshooo!
Ohh! Ok, I'm 'a hide the body.
Daahh, you didn't see anything!
Hello. Hi.
Nice ta meetcha, nice to meet you!
That was easy,
I just gave him a little neck massage, and he went to sleep.
Huh!
There's FOUR more guys over there!
BALLS!
Oh god, I hope climbing over this wall doesn't give me noise-do!
*no noise*
HaHA!
Sniper: "Need to deal with that checkpoint."
*groans* Euhhh...
I almost got Le Spottay!
I fuckin' see ya,
I fuckin' see ya!
I see EVERYBODY!
With my special eyes!
Oh yes, oh yes! OH YES!
AH, COME ON!
What are you gonna fuckin' do, go up and give him a pat on the back?
No, stand ri- right there!
Right there, come on.
*BANG* DOH NO!
Shit, I knew as soon as I let go!
Or, soon as I clicked the fucking trigger that it wasn't gonna work.
God damn it.
*BANG* PA-DOOSH-KOO!
*wooshy woosh*
*SPLAT* *PING*
Ooooh!
I would say you'd be eatin' all your meals through a straw from now on,
but I don't think you'll be eatin' many meals!
You know what?
If it wasn't for all the soldiers around trying to kill me,
this would actually be a very nice place.
Just go down by the river,
sit with my feet in the water, and do a bit of fishing.
That'd be lovely!
But NO... some motherfuckers, just want to
watch me SUFFER! *BANG*
"Warning: Mines." Hmmm...
Are you sure about that?
Oh, there's one, I see it.
[whispered] I got this. Shhh...
[hushed] Even the smallest fart could set these off!
*tools click* Sniper: "This could be handy."
[whispered] There we go, there we go! See?
When a TRUE PROFESSIONAL gets his hands on them,
it's very useful.
I feel like such a Peeping Tom in this game.
Just walking up to peoples' areas, and then
spying on them with binoculars.
"Destroy cache." Oooooh!
OOOHhh, could I do that now?
Sniper: "That truck's carrying ammo. Have to stop it."
Okay, let's see if we can do this.
Let's see,
if Jackaboy has what it takes,
to fuck shit up!
*KerBOOM!* YEAA HE DOES!!!
HAHA! Sniper: Nice work, if I say so myself.
FUCK yeah, that was awesome!
I AM the ground.
I am nature.
Dude, this is like a whole fucking village of enemies right here.
Don't you guys have anything better to do?
Shh!
Silent... as a fuckin' mouse...
Silent as a HAWK!
WHAT?!?!
*stunned silence*
Oh, I got lucky!
I pressed E, and then he turned around
and stood up and didn't do anything.
Sniper: Think I've grabbed all I can. Jack: Uh, yeah, did you grab all you can?
Did you get a good FEEL there? *BANG*
Do you wanna come into my fort, buddy?
*machine gun* Ahh!!! GOD! FUCKIN' HELL!
Go away! (x8)
Okay, you can come in and walk over my THING though, if you want.
*enemy shouts in German*
Jaaa! Walk over my mine.
Walk over my mine, you son of a bitch!
He's not gonna do it.
He's just not gonna do it. That's it. That's it. It's final.
*machine gun* FUCK YOU, then!
I PUT DOWN THAT TRAP FOR YOU!
*sob* He didn't even appreciate it.
Good lord, EVERYBODY'S out to
*BANG* FUCKIN' SHOOT JACK!
I can shoot back, you know! *PINGGG*
Yeah, ya see? That was a nice helmet shot.
And you. *BANG* AND YOU.
Yeah, I didn't forget about'cha!
*woosh*
*CRACK* OH! Right through his NOSE!
I have a mine set down at this door.
Yeah, that wire riiight there.
I'm waiting for fuckin'... Pablo to come on through.
Did he just go AROUND?
*pop* Why are you suddenly VERY SMART?!
Sons O' Bitches, man.
I was trying to do something cool!
Sneak-y, deak-y, deaky does it.
Who the FFFuck is there?
There's a guy right there, but I don't have him tagged.
Why don't I have him tagged?
Right in your fuckin'
*BANG* SHOULDER, BRO! *crunch*
Oh yeah! How you gonna shoot a gun without THAT?!
OWWW! JEESUS FUCK!
Right in your fuckin' shoulder as well. Wait, hold on!
*BANG* AND the other one!
*juicy crunch*
Ohhh, I actually shot you right through the fuckin' arm. Owww...
So I was supposed to be here to locate a dude...
Any- Any you guys see anything?
Friend? Hello?
NOBODY gives me ANY answers around here, man.
Is this him in here?
Aw nooo! Sniper: The body of the pilot from the crashed plane.
Sniper: This footage could be invaluable.
The sons a bitches killed him!
I WILL have your revenge!
Ohh, there's a sniper over there!
And a tr- treehouse...
OOHH! There's a guy ON that!
Ooo, nice, let's get the sniper first.
Let's kill this sniper bitch.
Annnnd, hold your breath and
*BANG* SQUEEZE!
*woosh* SQUEEZE your way to Bloody Brain Town!
*CRACK* YEAAH!
*BANG* Down you go! *laughs*
There was a guy standing on that, and I knocked him down!
Explosive... Explosive...
More explosives...
There are LOTS of explosives!
Including one big giant cannon!
Which is actually really fuckin' cool lookin', but...
I'm here to blow shit up!
*BANG* Did I? Did- AH!
*splat* OWWW! MISTER ONE-BALL! Oh god!
It NEVER gets any easier to look at that!
Okay, where are guys gonna come from? I- I know there's friends up here!
I got friends in high places.
Can I climb this tree? *tsk* *groan*
Wanted to relive my childhood.
Ok, that guy-
That guy wants to come this way.
That guy's gonna come this way.
So I'm a put a mine right there.
*evil laugh*
Ohh god, ohhh uhhh...
*grenade clangs against the rock*
*boom* *BOOM (from mine trap)*
YES! Got him!
And he fuckin' missed me!
Hahaha!
Fuck you, dude.
Ooh now I can do THIS.
Put the fuckin' trap down,
put the other trap down, and GO!
Go go go! (x2)
*BOOM* *SPLASHT* YEAH!
There they are.
Did I get the guy behind him as well?!
DOUBLE KILL!!!
*machine gun* AAAH! FUCK! *BANG*
Owww... my fuckin' shins!
I WAS gonna leave this truck and not blow it up,
but there's so many EXPLODY-DOOS!
Now I HAVE to.
Um... I have a whistle?
*Sniper lip whistles*
Ohhh, I thought it was an ACTUAL whistle,
Not just me going Whoot, Woohoo. *laughs*
Okay, let's see if we can get a better angle on this
Yeah, let's go up.
*KERPOW* Boom! Hahaha!
Completely pointless.
But always awesome.
This motherfucker... Ohh! Too shaky!
Oh god (x2.5)
That's a fuckin' TANK!
What do I do against a FUCKING TANK?!
*enemy gives orders in German*
Ohh, it stopped right here. Ohh g- Oh, no.
There's SO MANY of them.
Ooh, I have a grenade?!
*more orders*
["interpreting"] "The mon is cold?"
Maybe you should heat it up then! Ha ha ha.
*BOOM* *SPLASHT*
Ayyy! I got one guy!
Did I throw the other grenade?
*distant boom* I didn't fuckin' mean to.
I can shoot the TRACKS on this thing-
Ohhp! *BANG*
*BANG*
DRIVER kill!
Aaah FUCK! *BANG*
GUNNER kill!
AAHH!!
Hey, there's a guy down there.
Hello?
Uhh, there's nothing I can drop down there.
Can throw a rock at 'cha.
Hello- Hi...
Aww, I wanna be his friend!
But he can't-
He can't get up to me, and I can't get down to him.
Okay, I'm a blow up your giant gun first! And then I'll come down to ya.
*gasp* There's bad guys, that side.
Oh, there's bad guys, that side. Uh oh.
I'm a put a mine down... and then I'm also
gonna put one of THESE down...
Yep, yep, just like that...
And then hopefully one of you guys will come around there.
*enemies shooting*
...Maybe? I don't- AHH!
Ok ok, I'm plan- I'm planting a Satchel Charge!
Sniper: "It's time to move."
Do I have time, or something? Oh, umm...
Ok, "Time to move." That means "Get the FUCK off this thing!"
Uh, OYAH! Wup!
*bang* Ah! Fuck!
Ok, bandage yourself up, there you go.
Now you're ready for the ball, Cinderella.
HaHA! My PLAN all along!
This whole fuckin' bridge is coming down.
How do I set off my bomb? Do I shoot it?
*BANG* oHHo!
*woosh* I thought I had to go Beep!
Oh yeah. *satisfying ker-thud*
There you go!
OHHH YES!!!
Ohh! Let it ALL come down!
Let EVERYBODY DIE that's on that BRIDGE!
*metal grinding*
Oh JESUS! That's AWESOME!
*crumbling thuds*
[peacefully] Ahhh...
See, this is what happened when...
the Little Pigs wouldn't let the Wolf in.
He huffed and he puffed and he blew their house down.
Oh, I'm just done.
Best mission!
Kay, well THAT does it for THIS EPISODE of Sniper Elite 4.
That was a MUCH shorter one than the others that I've done- well,
That mission itself could've been like an hour and a half long if I did the whole thing.
Because there was so many teeny tiny parts to do, all the way around.
But I only did the main one, because
once I saw the giant cannon, I had to explode it really quickly! *chuckles*
But I like this, it's almost like a Long-Range Hitman kind of game.
Um, not as "complex" as the Hitman games, but I like that you can just pick people off,
piece-by-piece as you go around the level.
Really fun. Anyway,
THANK you guys, so much for watching this episode, if you LIKED it,
PUNCH that Like Button IN THE FACE
LIKE A BOSS! And,
*leans in* High fives all around W'psh! W'psh!
But THANK YOU GUYS, and I will see all you dudes...
IN THE NEXT VIDEO!!!
*"I'm Everywhere" by Teknoaxe plays*
*music ends*
[proudly] Every night, I go to bed,
and I dream about shooting testicles.