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>> Stephen: WELCOME BACK. YOU KNOW WHAT, FOLKS?
AFTER SUFFERING THROUGH A DAY OF WHATEVER THIS WAS OF THE
REPUBLICAN NATIONAL CONVENTION, WE DESERVE A REFRESHING DIP INTO
THE SMILE FILE.
LAST WEEK WE GOT A LITTLE BIT OF NEWS THAT COULDN'T HELP BUT
BRING A LITTLE GRIN TO MY BIN CONCERNING FORMER WHITE HOUSE
SURVIVOR STEVE BANNON.
BANNON WAS ARRESTED ON FRAUD CHARGES AND AFRAME OF MIND THE
SAME DAY.
HERE'S THE CROOM SKETCH.
AH-HA'S TAKE ON ME VIDEO DID NOT AGE WELL.
BANNON'S ARREST MEANS THAT EACH OF THE THREE PEOPLE WHO LED
TRUMP'S 2 2016 CAMPAIGN HAS NOW FACED CRIMINAL CHARGES.
JUST ANOTHER WAY TO DIFFERENTIATE THEMSELVES FROM
THE DEMOCRATS WHO'S CONVENTION THEME WAS UNITING AMERICA WHEN
REPUBLICANS WENT WITH FREE CELL BLOCK D.
THE ALLEGED FRAUD THAT ALLEGEDLY DEFINITELY HAPPENED WAS AT A
NONPROFIT DEDICATED TO CONSTRUCTING TRUMP'S BORDER WALL
CALLED WE BUILD THE WALL AND RELATED CHARITY WE TAKE YOUR
CASH, THIS UNUSUALLY PROFITABLE NONPROFIT RAISED $25 MILLION
FROM OVER 500,000 DONORS, IN PART BECAUSE ORGANIZERS PROMISED
THEY WOULD NOT TAKE A PENNY OF COMPENSATION FROM THESE
DONATIONS.
ALWAYS A LITTLE SUSPICIOUS WHEN PEOPLE TELL YOU EXACTLY WHAT
THEY'RE NOT GOING TO DO.
YOUR SURGERY IS SCHEDULED FOR MONDAY, I AM DEFINITELY NOT
GOING TO WAIT TILL YOU GO UNDER AND CARVE A DONG ON YOUR
FOREHEAD.
ACCORDING TO PROSECUTORS, BANNBANNONTOOK MORE THAN $1 MIL,
MOSTLY USED TO COVER PERSONAL EXPENSES.
HE AND THREE CRONIES KNEW THIS WAS WRONG BECAUSE THEY ROUTED
PAYMENTS FROM THE CAMPAIGN THROUGH A NONPROFIT AND ANOTHER
SHELL COMPANY DISGUISING THEM WITH FAKE INVOICES, SEEMS
SUSPICIOUS ESPECIALLY SINCE THE INVOICES ONLY HAD THREE ITEMS.
NOTHING TO SEE HERE.
NOT FRAUD, AND FRAUD.
ONE OF THE CO-CONSPIRATORS BRIAN USED THE BOAT HE BOUGHT WITH
ILLEGALLY SIPHONED "WE BUILD THE WALL" FUNDS TO SAIL IN THE JU
JULY 4th TRUMP BOAT PARADE.
( AS TRUMP ) ARE YOU TELLING ME ALL THE VOTERS WHO LOVED LEMEH
ARE DRIFTERS?
THEY REALLY ARE MY PEOPLE.
I LOVE YOU VOTERS!
CHOO-CHOO!
BANNON WASN'T ARRESTED AT HIS HOME WHICH IS UNDER A BRIDGE
WHERE HE ASKS RIDDLE 3.
INSTEAD HE WAS TAKEN OFF THE COAST OF WESTBROOK CONNECTICUT
WHEN ABOARD A MEGA YACHT OWNED BY A CHINESE BILLIONAIRE WANTED
ON CHARGES IN BEIJING ON CHARGES OF FRAUD, BLACKMAIL AND BRIBERY.
DON'T WORRY ECONOMICALLY TRUMP VOTERS, TRUMP WAS FIGHTING THE
FIGHT AGAINST THE GLOBALISTS TO GET YOUR COUNTRY BACK AND THE
ROOSTER FIGHTS.
WHAT A WEIRD PLACE TO HIDE OUT.
I KNOW WHERE THEY'LL NEVER LOOK.
DR. EVIL'S DOOM CREWS.
BLUE MAN GROUP'S PERFORMING.
BAN'S ARREST WAS A HUGE BLOW TO WE BUILD THE WALL WHICH
APPARENTLY STOPPED ACCEPTING DONATIONS.
THE WEB SITE IS STILL LIVE, BUT WHEN YOU HIT THE DONATE BUTTON,
IT SAID, AND THIS IS REAL, WHOOPSIE DAISY, LOOKS LIKE
SOMETHING WENT COMPLETELY WRONG, BUT DON'T WORRY, IT CAN HAPPEN
TO THE BEST OF US.
YES, BUT ALSO TO STEVE BANNON.
OH...
I THINK I'M HAVING WHAT THE GERMANS CALL A SHADDENGASM.
IF WE BUILD THE WALL SOUNDS FAMILIAR TO YOU, I DID A SEGMENT
LAST WEEK ON HOW A SECTION OF WALL WAS ABOUT TO FALL INTO THE
RIO GRANDE.
YOU MAY NOT HAVE SEEN IT BUT WE BUILD THE WALL DID.
THEY SENT OUT THIS EMAIL, STEPHEN COLBERT LIED ON HIS SHOW
AND SAID THE WALL YOU BUILT IS FALLING APART.
FIRST OF ALL BRIAN COLFIGGY, IF THAT IS YOUR NAME, DO NOT DRAG
MY NAME THROUGH THE MUD BECAUSE THAT MUD IS FILLED WITH PIECES
OF YOUR WALL.
SECOND, I WOULD LIKE TO POINT OUT THERE ARE THREE RECOGNIZABLE
FACES IN YOUR DRIFTER EMAIL, TWO TAKEN INTO FEDERAL CUSTODY.
I'LL GIVE YOU A HINT WHO ISN'T.
HE'S GOT TWO THUMBS AND HE'S LIVE ON CBS!
WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK WITH A PERFORMANCE BY GREGORY PORTER.