Wrestling video games are great aren’t they?
Being able to take the action of your favourite wrestling promotion into the comfort of your
own home.
You control the action, you make the booking decisions you feel are right.
You can even make dream matches come to life!
But not all games are worth your time, and buggy controls and awful ideas mean you may
have wasted your hard earned money.
Some people will tell you WrestleMania: The Arcade Game is awful, but they’re wrong.
I am Luke Owen, and these are five video game disasters.
WWF Betrayal
Sometimes a wrestling game just being about wrestling matches isn’t enough, and in 2001
THQ - on top of the world with their Smackdown series of games - released WWF Betrayal for
Game Boy Colour, a side-scrolling beat-em-up where you control a WWF superstar trying to
save a kidnapped Stephanie McMahon at the request of Vince McMahon.
You can select one of four characters - The Rock, Steve Austin, Triple H and The Undertaker
- and the final boss will be different depending on who you chose.
The game sees you go through various stages, beating up various people with various weapons,
before finally discovering that it was Vince who kidnapped Stephanie all along!
What a swerve!
You then fight your chosen end boss before capturing the WWF Championship.
“At six levels, only the most die-hard of WWF fanatics is going to be able to tolerate
the game's idiotic AI and limited control.”
- Gamespot, August 23, 2001
WWE Crush Hour
When you think of wrestling video games, what’s the first thing you think of?
A Twisted Metal rip-off where WWE superstars drive cars and shoot giant weapons at each
other?
Yeah, me too.
WWE Crush Hour was released for the PlayStation 2 and GameCube in 2003, and takes place in
a world where - get this - Vince McMahon realises his dream of owning all of the television
networks and can now put all of his superstars on every TV show and commercial.
This is clearly an idea suggested by Vince, as the WWF movie No Holds Barred is about
television networks fighting over wrestlers so they can get the best ratings.
But it did mean we got to see Kane barbecue.
The game sees you choose your favourite superstar - from The Rock, Rob Van Dam, The Undertaker,
Brock Lesnar and more - and then drive their vehicle into the demolition derby battlefield.
There’s various modes to play, like Iron Man, Hell in a Cell and Royal Rumble - but
they all play pretty much the same.
Jim Ross provides commentary, which is worth it just to hear him say “The Undertaker
has just got Twisty Rockets!”
You can then unlock bigger weapons to unleash on your opponents, and even perform special
moves like firing super rockets.
Although WWE Crush Hour was released as a budget title, it received very mixed reviews
and a proposed Xbox release of the game was cancelled.
“If you happen to end up with this thanks to a clueless relative or some other reason
we won't embarrass you by going into, you could feasibly enjoy it for a few minutes
- perhaps even an hour - but by the time you finish your 7th or 8th encounter, you'll be
wishing you'd just whipped out Carmageddon again instead of plodding on with this gaudy
nonsense.”
- Eurogamer, 2003
WCW Backstage Assault
In the late 90s and early 2000s, there was a real emphasis on wrestlers brawling backstage.
The introduction of the Hardcore Championship in WWF meant that wrestling could take place
in the streets, in bars and even in the Mississippi River.
WCW tried to capitalize on this craze - made popular by the wild brawls in ECW - with their
own hardcore division and a 2000 game which took place specifically backstage.
WCW Backstage Assault was released on PlayStation and Nintendo64 to a critical panning for its
awful controls, bland visuals and the fact there isn’t a bloody wrestling ring in a
wrestling game.
Instead players choose characters from WCW’s roster and compete in Hardcore Challenge,
where you fight to win the championship which you then can’t defend.
The biggest issue with WCW Backstage Assault is that it’s a stripped down version of
WCW Mayhem but with somehow worse graphics, and it’s backstage gimmick - though brave
- becomes very repetitive.
“It’s hard to recommend a wrestling game that doesn't contain any actual in-the-ring
wrestling.
EA's Backstage Assault is a novel idea, but in the end, it doesn't have enough variation
to make it worthwhile.”
Gamespot, 2000
Backyard Wrestling 2: There Goes The Neighbourhood
Speaking of popular fads in the late 90s and early 2000s, Backyard Wrestling became a popular
VHS and DVD brand in the days before this sort of thing was readily available on YouTube
with The Best of Backyard Wrestling Series,which gave us names like future WWE Tough Enough
contestant M-Dogg 20.
2003’s Backyard Wrestling: Don’t Try This At Home was a fairly decent game, but Backyard
Wrestling 2: There Goes The Neighbourhood is a rushed sequel, with zero improvements
in gameplay despite Paradox Development’s big promises.
It does, however, feature a more varied roster than its predecessor, including former ECW
wrestlers New Jack, Sabu and The Sandman, as well as TNA star Sonjay Dutt and rock musician
Andrew W.K.
And yes, just like the DVDs the game features scantily clad ladies - in the form of adult
film stars Tera Patrick and Sunrise Adams.
Still, it’s classier than BMX XXX.
The game does boast a decent soundtrack, but it was reviewed very poorly by critics when
it hit PlayStation 2 and Xbox in 2004.
“Two or three years ago, Paradox Development's Backyard Wrestling 2: There Goes the Neighborhood
might have been a pretty decent entry-level wrestling game.
But the reality in the here and now is that it's a pretty lackluster realization of our
favorite pseudo-sport.”
IGN, 2004
The Simpsons Wrestling
Since their debut in the late 80s The Simpsons have had many video game adventures.
Bart has fought off space mutants, saved the world and even survived nightmares.
Although they had the fantastic arcade game, The Simpsons wouldn’t have a decent outing
on the home consoles until their GTA clone Simpsons Hit N Run in 2003 - and never is
that more true than the 2001 disaster The Simpsons Wrestling.
How did this go so wrong?
There are a great variety of characters, brilliant locations and a simple gimmick, but Simpsons
Wrestling remains a wretched game.
Bugged by horrible controls, ugly graphics and a repetitive grappling system.
The game does have the lure of unlocking classic characters like Bumblebee Man and Professor
Frink, but it’s difficult to stay invested and continue playing, with Game Informer’s
Andrew Reiner calling it one of the worst games on the PlayStation.
As Botchamania’s Maffew put it: “Wrestling is great, The Simpsons are great, video games
are great, and yet…”
Those were bad, but what about WWE spooky characters that failed?
And what is The Undertaker’s missing WrestleMania 21 match?
Click the videos to the left to find out more.
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I have been Luke Owen and that was wrestling.