A question from anonymous: he asks... hi Tripp amazing podcast. I've been listening
to your podcast and your advice that I had been slowly implementing has helped me start to change
my mindset. However, I still have yet to be successful in initiating any moves past the
friend-zone. I was always the type of guy that would wait for the girl to initiate contact
when escalation would occur. I know you'd like the detailed emails so here you go. Recently,
I got put in charge of creating and making social events with other chapters for colleges
for a business club that I joined. I just joined the club last semester and now I'm
starting to meet some of these girls in person. I was wondering if you had any advice towards
talking to girls at these socials, as I've never been a part of any college clubs before.
Second topic, and we'll go into that in just a second. I want to comment on this for a second.
You said here, anonymous, you said I was always the type of guy that would wait for the girl to
initiate contact when escalation would occur. That is a big mistake. And that's one of the
reasons why you are in the friend-zone and can't move past the friend-zone. I'm a little confused.
I don't know if you fixed this problem or not. But hopefully it's a problem. And for all the
listeners out there, I need to help you understand that that is a problem. You cannot wait for the
woman to make the first move. The reason why is because a woman is always waiting for you
to make the first move. She's waiting for you, generally speaking, she's waiting for you to lead
the relationship in terms of getting physical and moving it forward with asking her out or
asking her on a date. She's waiting for you to take the lead. Don't believe me? Try not taking
the lead and see how far it goes with any girl that you end up with. You say here, second topic,
there's this one girl from another college who I just did a hiking event with and it went well.
We hung out twice at the beach but it was my usual small talk without any flirtation. I know
I shouldn't be putting her on a pedestal, but I really like her energy. It's funny you say this...
I know I shouldn't be putting her on a pedestal... you say that, yet, you're still probably doing it.
Anyways, you say I really like her energy and feel that I could definitely grow as a person with her.
She's a party girl and she... that's interesting. She's a party girl and sees me as a cool,
funny person. But I feel like I'm getting trapped in the friend-zone. She seems very
comfortable with me and I know that I have to keep it professional for the business club. But I feel
like when the semester is over, I should ask her out and call it a real date. I may be wrong though
and should ask her out sooner. But I don't want anything to be weird between us at our meetings.
Here's what you need to understand. Let's talk about the second topic first. With this woman,
this is not work. This is a business club that happens to be at college. I don't think this is
that big of a deal personally to just ask her out now. However, you have to figure out
what's more important to you, the business club or this girl? Because... or I should say,
you have to be okay with the fact that this girl that you are going to be potentially asking out,
if it's going to be awkward and you can't handle that awkwardness and it's going to ruin the
business club for you, you shouldn't be asking her out. While it's not the biggest deal in terms of
the fact that this isn't a work environment, it's still an environment in which you are
you could feel uncomfortable and that could ruin business club for you. You got to figure out what
your priorities are there. Is it more important to keep it calm and collected and not a big deal
when you're going to the business club and making sure that it's not going to be awkward?
Or is it more important for you to ask out this girl? That's up to you. But that's
the idea there. Then you asked... any advice towards talking to girls at these socials? I've
never been a part of any college clubs before. Yes. Well, this whole podcast is dedicated to
talking to girls so I can't spend three hours answering this question. But I can tell you this,
from my experience in college, one of the things that I wish I did more was talk to more girls in
general. I feel like you have this opportunity to talk to a lot of girls in your social clubs
and at these socials. The idea here is volume. Talk to as many women as possible
and learn how to flirt. First, get used to talking to these women, get comfortable
with having conversations with women, and then learn how to flirt. You can learn how to flirt
by checking out my Hooked program. If you don't want to do that, I can give you a
few quick tips. Make sure that you're giving good eye contact, you're teasing her a little
bit to make it playful, showing her that you're not intimidated by her
and qualifying her. Which means that you are asking her questions to make sure she's someone
that you're actually going to be interested in so she sees that you're challenging her.